The Merits of a College Education
by Mitsuru Aki
Summary: When Roxas gets picked up from his college for the weekend by his older brothers, he doesn't mean to unleash them on his professors. Honestly. It just sort of...happened. Anyway, they are not pleased. AxR CxL ZxD
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: No, I do not own Kingdom Hearts or Final Fantasy, sorry to disappoint. Owning them would make me deliriously happy, and if there's anything I've learned in my life, it's that I am not destined to be happy. So there.

Warnings: Ummm, the usual? Yaoi...eventually. Language. College stuff. Axel. You know.

Author's Note: I know! I'm sorry! I'm supposed to be working on chapter five of Catch Me. And I am! Really! I just....Kingdom Hearts has pwned my soul for the last year, but this is the first of it I've posted. I will get around to chapter five! It's half written! And yes, this is more than just a one-shot. So don't worry. Yes, I am aware of Cloud's OOCness. I just...don't care. It's not horrible, so I won't freak out over it. Besides, this was highly amusing to write.

So many mistakes! Argh! But thank you for pointing them out so I can correct them! I'm pretty sure I got them all...

Okay, I swear. All the mistakes should be gone now. I promise not to post without editing properly ever again.

xxxxx

Title: The Merits of a College Education

xxxxx

College was a bitch, Roxas decided.

Sure, it was Friday and all, but that didn't really matter in the grand scheme of things. Not at all. And because he hadn't had class until 11:40am, he took the opportunity to catch up on some much needed sleep, which resulted in him oversleeping and sending him into a frenzy of panic as he ran around his dorm room trying to find his mysteriously misplaced textbooks, decidedly NOT being helped by his roommate, Riku, who burrowed under his covers and ignored him.

Then he missed the bus, he _saw_ it drive away as he set foot on the street, but he didn't do much more than hiss curses under his breath since it was too far away to make chasing it worthwhile. Waiting twenty minutes for the next bus was torture, spent nervously watching the seconds tick by on his watch and anxiously checking the street.

By the time he caught his ride and arrived at campus after an agonizingly slow journey, Roxas had four minutes to get to class. He could NOT miss his chemistry quiz. It would kill his already dismal grade.

The sprint across campus with his skateboard tucked under his arm (using it was pointless, as he was going uphill) definitely made the top of his "Things I Never Want to Do Ever Again" list. When he finally bolted through his classroom door and collapsed in his seat, he was three minutes late. Professor Zexion was calmly explaining a problem on the board at the front of the classroom as though Roxas hadn't practically sacrificed ten years of his life to make _his_ class. Bastard.

Twenty minutes later, the quizzes were out, Roxas' mind not-so-conveniently blanked out on how to write empirical formulas, Professor Zexion kicked everyone out of the classroom fifteen minutes early, finished or not, and the class ended.

Was it worth all the stress he'd been through that morning? No, no it wasn't.

Which left Roxas in his current state of moodily riding his skateboard to the closest pick up/drop off lot of Radiant Twilight University, mentally complaining about the sad, depressing thing also known as his life.

A loud, obnoxious honk knocked him out of his thoughts and almost off his skateboard, making him scramble to regain his balance and locate the origin of the sound. His eyes focused on a small black car twenty-five feet away. Roxas could see his older brothers through the windshield, Cloud shoving Demyx away from the steering wheel with no small amount of annoyance.

Roxas leveled a glare at them.

Demyx glanced up from Cloud's impenetrable defense of his side of the vehicle, his eyes lighting up at the sight of Roxas. The dirty blond abandoned his failed attempt to take over the car and waved energetically, drawing Cloud's attention to his youngest brother. Cloud nodded, jerking his head back and to the side, telling Roxas to get in without any verbal effort on his part.

"Roxas!" Demyx exclaimed happily, twisting awkwardly in his seat to see the aforementioned as the back door opened.

Roxas threw his bag on the empty seat and hauled himself in after it. "Was that really necessary?" he asked Demyx grumpily, setting his skateboard in the empty floor space of the empty seat.

Demyx frowned. "I didn't think you would see us," he explained, trying to loosen his seatbelt so it wasn't restricting his unnecessarily yoga-like position.

"Turn around and sit properly," Cloud told Demyx irritably, turning himself to look at Roxas with one hand on the steering wheel and the other over the back of his seat. "As though Demyx needs an excuse to do anything _un-_necessary," he remarked dryly.

"Point taken." Roxas nodded in resigned acknowledgement, both of them ignoring the middle brother's complaints and protests.

"Come on, Roxas, close the door so we can—" Cloud stopped abruptly, eyes locked on something moving beyond Roxas' right shoulder.

"Cloud?" Roxas questioned, raising an eyebrow.

Demyx stared at Cloud for a few seconds before leaning around his seat to see what had captured his older brother's attention. Not even a moment later, he froze just like Cloud, eyes widening with interest and eyebrows slowly rising to his hairline.

Roxas watched, vaguely fascinated, as both sets of his brothers' blue eyes followed the same path just behind him. How…creepy.

"_Damn_…" Cloud and Demyx breathed at the same time, simultaneously shifting to the right to keep a clear view of whatever they were watching.

"What?" Roxas questioned with bewildered amusement, finally turning around. "What are you watching?"

"Not 'what', 'who'," Demyx corrected, not bothering to spare Roxas a glance.

Roxas looked briefly back at his preoccupied brothers before returning to his window. "Who, those two?"

Two well-dressed men were walking by the drop off/pick up area to the buildings at the other end of the lot, deep in discussion of some kind. One of them was almost a head taller than the other, with long deep brown hair and intense gray eyes. It was hard to see from their current angle, but a scar arched between his eyes and across the bridge of his nose. He nodded to something his companion said, slipping his hands into the pockets of his black dress pants.

Said companion gestured to emphasize some sort of point, then reached up to brush long, metallic-blue bangs from eyes of the same color, looking up to judge the other man's reaction. It was easy to almost mistake him for a woman due to his build (was it even legal for men to _have_ a figure like that?) yet something about the way he moved and held himself was definitely male.

"Do you know them, Roxas?" Cloud inquired distractedly, reaching blindly forward to start the ignition without removing his eyes from their current subject.

"Uh yeah," Roxas said, not understanding what the big deal was. His siblings were so strange. "They're my professors."

Two pairs of blue eyes snapped onto him, full of disbelief and…was that resentment? Envy?

"Your _professors_?" Demyx repeated, and yup, that was definitely jealousy there.

"Yeah. The taller one is Professor Leonhart, he's my calculus teacher; and the other one is Professor Zexion. He's my chem. lecture teacher."

"_My_ professors never looked like that," Cloud muttered in a way that could almost be described as _sulkily._

"I think I'm gay," Demyx announced, still watching the two men walking away.

Roxas' eyebrows furrowed in consternation, staring at his semi-mohawked brother. "What?"

Cloud didn't even bat an eyelash. "I've been gay."

"SINCE WHEN?!" Roxas exclaimed shrilly, pulling at his hair in a misguided effort to understand what the _hell_ his brothers were thinking.

"Since that brunet walked by…" Cloud answered seriously and started the engine. Temporarily forgetting his 'Use It Or Die' policy about seatbelts, the eldest blond tossed his arm back over his seat, looked backwards to check for pedestrians, and threw the car into reverse.

"Cloud, what are you doing?" Roxas asked, not bothering to hide the panic in his voice, clearly evident by how his words rose several octaves into the stratosphere. "Why—"

His professors were rapidly getting closer. _Oooooh._ That's why.

"Cloud, stop!" Roxas hissed, absolutely mortified at his brother's behavior. As though his teachers wouldn't notice a car rapidly backing up beside them. Please. "Stop, don't—"

Too late.

Professor Leonhart glanced sideways at the car, then quickly did a double-take as he realized the car was not vanishing from his peripheral vision. He paused, watching the car warily, confusion flitting over his features. Professor Zexion peered curiously around his colleague, wanting to see what had stopped him.

"Cloud—" Roxas began desperately, horrified this was happening. This couldn't possibly be happening.

"Ask him something," Cloud snarled, giving Roxas a fierce glare his status as the oldest brother had perfected. "Anything. Do it. Now."

Roxas reluctantly scrolled his window down, humiliation and awkwardness preferable to the torture his brother would inflict on him otherwise.

Professor Leonhart's eyes brightened with recognition at the blond's face. "Ah…Roxas…right?"

"Yeah, uhhh…" Roxas muttered. "Umm, I had a question about…the…homework," he lied. Damn Cloud.

The other man nodded, taking a few steps closer to the car so he could hear him. "Okay."

"Ummmm…well, you said the homework is due on Monday, right?"

"Yes…"

"Well, did you mean in class on Monday, or…I think you said something about later…"

His professor's face smiled slightly. Maybe. Or Roxas might have imagined it. But that would be a strange imagined-thing. "No, no. Well, if you have it ready by class, go ahead and hand it in. But it's due by the end of the day, not necessarily in class."

"Ohhhh…but then where should I…?"

"Just put it in my mailbox. That'll be fine."

Roxas frowned. "Where is that?"

Professor Leonhart opened his mouth to respond and paused, glancing around at the nearby buildings. "They're in the Office of Mathematics and Sciences Department."

Roxas stared at him blankly.

A new voice sighed, Professor Zexion appearing at the brunet's elbow from his other side. "It's five doors down from my classroom, Strife," he said flatly, crossing his arms.

"Oh. Okay."

The chemistry professor rolled his eyes. "Anything else?"

"I don't think so…"

Professor Zexion's eyes flickered over the other occupants of the car, settling on the more visible of the two. They locked eyes, and Demyx gave him a slow smile.

"We'll be seeing you on Monday then, Strife," Zexion said calmly, holding eye contact for a few more seconds before looking back at Roxas. "My homework, however, is due _in class_."

Roxas swallowed. "Right."

Professor Zexion began walking again and Professor Leonhart nodded at the blond, amusement tugging at the corners of his lips. "Goodbye, Roxas. Have a good weekend."

"You too…" Roxas said softly, glaring at Cloud out of the corner of his eye. He scrolled his window back up as his calculus teacher caught up to Professor Zexion.

"I hate you, Cloud," Roxas snapped. "That was so middle school."

"I hate you too," Cloud retorted. "And you can't possibly be learning anything in those classes. He's too distracting. I want you to drop his class."

"Cloud!"

"No, seriously," Demyx added, giving Roxas a sort of stern look while Cloud pulled away from the drop off area and headed towards the street. "How can you possibly be paying attention to chemistry with Zexion teaching it? You're probably watching them for the whole class anyway."

"Especially in calculus," Cloud agreed.

Demyx pulled a face, giving Cloud a weird look. "Uh, no. Chemistry is definitely more distracting."

"Nuh uh," Cloud disagreed, returning Demyx's expression. "Calculus is. Did you see that body?"

"My point exactly!" Demyx exclaimed, throwing his hands in the air and sending Cloud a 'Hell-o!' look. "Have you ever seen a guy shaped like that? No, you haven't. The man's got hips!"

"Yeah, and a charming personality," Cloud said sarcastically, making a right onto the main road.

Demyx smirked. "That's cuz he's a _real_ man."

"What's that even supposed to mean?" Cloud asked, eyeing Demyx suspiciously when he should have been watching the road. "_Real men_ don't have hour glass figures."

"He didn't have an hourglass figure!" Demyx said heatedly. "He's just…hot. Who wouldn't stare at him all day?"

Roxas couldn't believe how ridiculous this was getting. "Why would I stare at _either_ of them all day?"

Cloud stomped on the brakes and Demyx gasped, both of them whipping around to stare at him incredulously.

"What do you mean '_why'_?" Demyx asked, aghast.

"Are you blind?" Cloud questioned, actual concern in his voice.

"Oh dear god, the boy is blind," Demyx moaned, covering his face with his hands and slumping against his door. "Oh god…"

"I don't see the big deal here!" Roxas said loudly, crossing his arms and huffing in annoyance. Why did he have to be related to such drama queens? "So they're good-looking guys. I get it. What's your point?"

"THAT IS THE POINT," Cloud and Demyx said simultaneously, as though that were obvious. Which it was, obviously, to them.

Roxas scowled. "You two are so shallow," he muttered under his breath.

"Hey, first impressions are important," Demyx insisted. He grinned at Cloud. "And those two made a _fantastic_ first impression."

"Oh yeah," Cloud agreed. "_Very_ nice."

Roxas leaned his head against his window. "I can't believe I'm related to you two."

Demyx just laughed, leaning his head back to look at his younger brother. "Awww, just wait 'til little Roxie meets his special someone…"

The youngest blond glared at him. "Call me that again and I'll castrate you in your sleep," he threatened.

Cloud chuckled. "Well, that would put a kink in your plans with Zexion, wouldn't it, Demyx?"

"Okay, STOP," Roxas interjected. "Seriously, you guys. I'll never be able to look them in the eyes again if you keep this up."

"Such virgin ears…" Demyx said with feigned nostalgia as Cloud pulled into their driveway. "I remember those times…"

Cloud turned off the ignition. "Well, it's good to have you two home for the weekend. I'll have to pick you two up from college more often."

"Especially Roxas," Demyx quipped, trying to smother a grin due to the murderous glare on Roxas's face.

"I think I'll have to have a little talk with your professor, Roxas. Wasn't calculus the class you were having trouble with?"

Roxas frowned, thinking. "Well, yeah, but…"

"Good. That's settled then."

Roxas sighed, grabbed his bag and skateboard, closed the car door, and headed up to the house, listening to Demyx chatter about chemistry and teacher meetings. This did not bode well. As though he needed his siblings involved in his college life.

He heaved a sigh and followed Demyx inside to face his parents. Things couldn't possibly get any worse.

xxxxx

Author's Note: Review! You people are the reason why we authors bother posting most of this stuff, so let us know you exist and that we're not hallucinating your presence! Tell me what you think about it. And I will keep writing. Thank you! *bows*


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: No, I do not own Kingdom Hearts or Final Fantasy, sorry to disappoint. Owning them would make me deliriously happy, and if there's anything I've learned in my life, it's that I am not destined to be happy. So there.

Warnings: Ummm, the usual? Yaoi...eventually. Language. College stuff. Axel. You know.

Author's Note: Another update! A miracle! I'm very pleased at how well this is being received. Thank you to those of you who reviewed! I promise I edited this so it shouldn't be as painful to go through as the first chapter. On another note…I believe in crack pairings. There are a few very minor pairings that are mentioned but will most likely not show up again. But crack side pairings are fair game. And fun to try and justify. I only use them for unimportant characters and parents, just so you know.

Hopefully you'll like it and more of you lovely people will leave this story equally lovely reviews! Onward!

xxxxx

Chapter Two

xxxxx

"We're home!" Cloud called as they trailed into the house, boots and shoes thudding against the hardwood floor in a cacophony of sound. Demyx flitted past his older brother and into the kitchen, where their mother was most likely to be found (whether she was cooking or not), chattering a mile a minute about Roxas, most likely.

Her laugh floated into the hallway as Roxas moodily carted his bag and skateboard to the stairs, planning on dropping them off in his room before he could be caught by either of his parents. One of their favorite pastimes seemed to be playing Twenty Questions about their children's lives. And while this was understandable after not having seen any of their four kids because of school or work, he really wasn't in the mood for it.

After stomping his way up the stairs, Roxas made a beeline for his room at the end of the hall. He was about three feet from his door when a shadow fell over him, its outline darkening the wood's white paint. He sighed.

"Hi dad."

"'ello there, stranger! How's my Roxy been doing, all alone in the big bad world?"

Roxas made a face as a heavy hand ruffled his hair, a couple rings snagging on a few lone strands. "Fine, dad. Or I was, until Demyx and Cloud showed up."

His father chuckled. "Just doing what they do best."

"Yeah, humiliating me."

Another chuckle. "Put your things in your room and head on downstairs. Has your mother seen you, lad?"

"No," Roxas muttered.

"Don't be keeping her waiting, then. She'll want to know how her littlest one's been doing."

He scowled. "Her 'littlest one' isn't so little anymore, dad."

His father turned and headed for the stairs, calling over his shoulder, "You keep telling her that Roxy. See if it makes a difference!"

Roxas attacked his door with a vengeance, the panel bouncing off the wall, and chucked his bag into the farthest corner of his room. Stupid weekends and having to visit stupid family. Just stupid.

"ROXAS!" Came Demyx's voice from the first floor, using way more lungpower than was absolutely necessary considering he couldn't possibly have been any more than five inches from the bottom of the staircase. "NAMINÉ'S HERE!"

Spirits lifting significantly, Roxas slammed his door shut and hurtled down the stairs, almost flattening Demyx as he flew past his startled brother. "Naminé?"

A gentle laugh came from the entryway before she entered the hallway to the kitchen, blue eyes, blonde hair, white dress and all. "Miss me, Roxas?"

Roxas practically tackle hugged her into the wall. "_Yes!_ The sane one's here. You have no idea how relieved I am."

Naminé laughed again and returned his hug. She turned them towards the kitchen, her arm held comfortingly around his waist and one of his around her shoulder.

Cloud glanced up from his seat at the kitchen table as they entered with Demyx following behind them, arms crossed. "Finally getting married?"

Roxas made a face at him. "You're just jealous she likes me better than you."

Cloud shook his head emphatically. "She played dress up with me until you were born because I was 'prettier' than Demyx. _Not _the attention I'm looking for. I don't miss those times at all, Roxas. Just wait 'til she tries to put you in a dress."

Roxas snorted, looking at Naminé with raised eyebrows. "Seriously?"

Naminé nodded. "Mum has pictures."

"_What?_" Cloud turned violently to stare accusingly at his mother, who was stirring pasta on the stove. "You told me you got rid of those five years ago!"

"Who got rid of what?" Their father entered the room and pulled out the nearest chair, sitting down and leaning on the table.

"Oh Luxord, lunch is almost ready. And we were just talking about how Naminé used to dress Cloud up when they were little," their mother said from the stove, smiling.

"I could have sworn you'd given me another girl instead of a son, Aurora," Luxord said thoughtfully, stroking his goatee and ignoring Cloud's glare.

"Why do you still have those?" Cloud asked heatedly, running a hand through his spiked hair in frustration. "They're embarrassing. I'm twenty-three now."

Demyx sniggered.

Aurora frowned at him, laying a calming hand on Cloud's shoulder in passing as she went to take down the plates from the cabinets. "They're part of your childhood, Cloud. We're not just going to throw them away."

"Is that the only reason? Because I'm pretty sure I've got some other childhood memories I'm a _lot_ more fond of."

"Can I see them?" Roxas asked, glancing at his mother for approval.

"_No,_" Cloud snarled, slamming a fist on the table. "I'll never be able to put the fear of God in you again if you see them."

"Cloud, control yourself," Luxord said sharply. "No need to get all miffed over a few photographs."

His oldest son took a couple deep, supposedly calming breaths. "But they're not just photos, dad. She's got _albums_. Of _me_. In _dresses._ You've never been in a dress. You don't understand the humiliation my masculinity is going through."

Luxord waved a hand dismissively. "It's not that bad. I would know."

His children all stared at him as Aurora handed him a cup of tea.

"What? 'S it that unusual?"

Cloud turned to his mother. "Mum. Tell him."

Aurora started putting the other cups of tea and food-laden plates on the table. "Tell him what, honey?"

"That that's not normal."

She paused, thinking, as her other children started taking their seats. "Your father was wearing a dress when I first met him," she said thoughtfully. "He was in the drama club in college."

"Ohhhh," Demyx said in a voice of dawning realization. "So _that's_ why we're so screwed up and weird!"

Naminé swatted him on the arm as Aurora said, "None of you are weird, sweetie, you're all perfectly normal."

Roxas raised his eyebrows and Cloud took a drink from his cup to keep himself from responding to that sincerely uttered statement. "Can we _please_ just throw those away?"

"Don't be a flibbergibbet, Cloud," Luxord said confidently, digging into his lunch as his wife sat down. "We're not going to get rid of them. Those are the sort of things we show your future wife when you're ready to settle down. Make sure the woman really wants to lash herself to you for all of eternity and such."

Cloud choked on his tea and shoved himself away from the table, staggering to the sink.

"Or a boyfriend," Demyx said deviously, speaking around a mouthful of fettuccini alfredo.

Luxord raised an eyebrow, an intimidating look.

"Don't speak with your mouth full, Demyx," Aurora said reprimandingly, handing her middle son a napkin.

"Sorry Mum."

"What's this about a boyfriend?" Luxord asked, frowning, watching his oldest son at the counter. "Cloud has a boyfriend?"

"Well—" Demyx started.

"_NO._" Roxas cut him off, feeling his shoulders rise in anticipation of the upcoming subject matter. "No, he doesn't."

"Cloud?" Luxord asked, wanting to hear it from him.

Cloud just continued to thump his chest with his fist and occasionally gagged, eyes watering from the burning pain in his throat.

"You know," Naminé said conversationally, completely innocent. "Tea is supposed to go down your esophagus, not your windpipe."

Cloud glared at her with pink eyes.

"Leave Cloud alone for now," Aurora said gently. "What's this about a boyfriend? Who has one?"

"I do," Naminé said, fighting a smile.

"Yes dear, we know. I meant the boys."

"Just thought I'd join in."

"They _don't have boyfriends,_" Roxas declared, leveling a warning look at Demyx.

"Not yet," Demyx agreed, purposely mistranslating Roxas' 'Tell Them and DIE' expression into something much more friendly and agreeable with flowers and bunny rabbits.

"'Yet'?" Luxord's other white-blond eyebrow rose to follow the first.

"Roxas' professor's are _hawt,_" Demyx said, a broad grin splitting his face as he leaned across the table towards his mother. "Seriously."

Roxas kicked out under the table.

Naminé gasped and reached for her shin. "Ow!"

"I'm so sorry, Ne. I was aiming for Demyx," Roxas told her apologetically, putting a comforting hand on her shoulder.

"_Blindly _aiming," she muttered, her face now parallel with the table.

Cloud went to the freezer and took out a bag of frozen vegetables, dropping them on Naminé's head. The small amount of unexpected extra pressure forced her forehead to the table with a thud.

"Ahh—ow," she repeated, sighing. "Thanks."

Cloud sat back down in his seat, looking marginally more pleased.

"Roxas, don't be acting like a little one. You passed that stage ages ago," Luxord told Roxas sternly, looking at the son on his left.

"Sorry Dad."

"So, you have good-looking professors, Roxas?" Aurora said brightly.

"No—"

"YES," Demyx and Cloud said together, the older one's voice slightly hoarse still.

Roxas huffed disbelievingly, stabbing at his pasta irritably.

"Since when have you ever looked twice at a man, Cloud?" Luxord inquired, puzzled. "You've always been popular with the ladies."

"I've always looked twice at men, dad," Cloud said easily, clearing his throat. "I just wasn't interested in dating them. Zack's not my best friend for his brains."

"Excuse me," Naminé said sharply from under the table. "My boyfriend is very intelligent, thank you."

"Admit it Ne," Cloud retorted flatly. "'Smart' was not the first word you thought of when you met him."

She peered over the top of the table, looking pensive. "Okay, it wasn't," she admitted.

"What was?" Demyx asked.

She sighed again. "'Dork'."

Roxas and Demyx burst out laughing. Aurora and Luxord smiled.

"What about you, Cloud?" Demyx poked Cloud's bicep. "What did you first think?"

Cloud leaned back, thinking. "'Hot'," he said finally. "And then he opened his mouth."

His older sister smiled ruefully, fully sitting up. "But he is smart," she insisted.

Zack's best friend tilted his head in acknowledgment. "Yes. But you don't figure that out until later."

"About these professors," their father said loudly. "What sort of gents are they?"

"Yes, tell us about them," Aurora added interestedly. "What do they teach?"

Demyx responded promptly. "Calculus and chemistry."

Luxord stared at Roxas. "You're taking calculus? Whatever for?"

"For my major," Roxas muttered obstinately, pulling his cup towards him. "Biotechnology."

"Sounds expensive," the blond man mused, settling back in his chair.

His wife nudged him hard with her elbow.

"I mean complicated and difficult," he amended, rubbing his side. "And what are their names?"

"Professors—"

"Zexion," Roxas' immediate older sibling cut in.

"And Leonhart," Cloud continued, pushing his cold lunch around his plate.

"First names or last names?"

"Ummm…actually, I don't know, Dad," Roxas said, realizing it as the truth.

"Well find out," Cloud said shortly.

"Don't most professors have websites nowadays?" Naminé asked curiously, looking from Demyx to Cloud for confirmation. "They might even have pictures up."

Both brothers perked up immensely at that idea. Roxas was suddenly glad he'd kicked his sister. He must have known she'd turn against him.

His half-mohawked brother bolted out of his seat. "I'll get my laptop!"

"But I don't know—"

"It'll be on their syllabus, Roxas. Go get them," Cloud commanded, narrowing his eyes.

Roxas hesitated, thinking about refusing. After all, how frightening could Cloud be when Naminé used to—

His oldest brother seemed to know what was running through Roxas' mind. He leaned forward, unhurried, holding Roxas' eyes in a cold gaze, the two of them seated on opposite ends of the table. "Until you find those photo albums," he said slowly, voice low and threatening, "I own your soul. Go. Get. The syllabus. _Now._"

Roxas fled.

xxxxx

Author's Note: Review! Poor Cloud. Lol. The crack pairings weren't that bad, eh? It was fun writing Luxord, but a bit difficult. And Luxord is a very good-looking guy, so it's no wonder where Cloud gets his looks from. Has anyone else noticed how similar their genetics are? Maybe it's just me. *shrugs*

And I've posted a poll on my profile page to see what you guys want me to update next. VOTE. I will not post anything else, for any of my stories, until I get a result of some kind. Maybe some of you guys will find that easier than reviewing, since there's no actual typing or anything. Just button clicking. So do it! Or you'll never know how many ways Roxas can be tortured by his siblings…


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: No, I do not own Kingdom Hearts or Final Fantasy. Shocking, I know. And here I thought Axel and Reno were all mine, too.

Warnings: Ummm, the usual? Yaoi...eventually. Language. College stuff. Axel. You know.

Author's Note: And here's chapter three for you all! Sorry about such a long time between updates, but the poll dictated that I update my Gundam Wing story first; it beat this fic by double the votes. Just wow. Them Gundam Wing peeps are crazy fierce. So now you get your chapter, and it is significantly longer than the previous two. Hopefully you will enjoy it and review for me! Let me know if you see any mistakes, and I shall promptly fix them.

xxxxx

Chapter Three

xxxxx

When Roxas woke up the next morning, he'd sincerely hoped that the events of the previous day had only been a dream, brought on by ice cream for dinner and his roommate's weird taste in music. The second he'd opened his eyes, however, had unceremoniously dispelled that idea at the sight of his own bedroom wall. Damn.

He was now sitting in the kitchen eating toast ("No, Dad, I do _not_ want tomatoes on it!") with yogurt and orange juice, ignoring both his father and the events that had happened in that very room a mere twenty hours ago. That had lasted for the rest of the day. Roxas scowled at his juice.

Once Roxas had brought his teachers' papers down to the kitchen at Cloud's command, Demyx had arrived with his laptop ready to go and his brothers had practically attacked him for the information. His parents had been just as enthusiastic about the whole thing, wanting to know who it was that had so thoroughly captured their sons' attention, while Naminé couldn't have been more amused if she'd tried to be. Stupid family.

Demyx and Cloud spent the rest of the day searching the internet for anything and everything even remotely relevant to Roxas' professors, Demyx even going so far as to read every article or thesis ever written by one Dr. Zexion Ienzo (and asking anyone within hearing range to translate the scientific jargon…which often happened to be the whole work).

Professor Squall Leonhart, on the other hand, was quite a bit less prominent on the web, with his university website being the only source of verifiable information on that specific Leonhart. But apparently he, like the Strifes, had a large family. Or it was just coincidence that so many Leonharts existed in the world.

Either way, Cloud was not satisfied.

"Roxy," came Luxord's voice from behind his paper, voice knowing. "I can hear your teeth grinding from here."

"They're not grinding," Roxas responded automatically, chomping viciously into his toasted bread. Crumbs flew everywhere.

His father lowered the newspaper he'd been reading just enough to peer at Roxas over the top. It rose back up slowly. "Sure they're not, lad."

"They're not!"

"You have anything to do today?" Luxord asked, calmly changing the subject. "Any more good looking blokes to tell me about?"

"No," Roxas snapped, glaring daggers at the blaring headline FORMER MODEL ACCEPTS JOB AT LOCAL UNIVERSITY on the front page. "I wasn't even going to say anything about the other two."

"So secretive, Roxy!"

"Not secretive! Just not important!"

"Mmmmhmmmm…"

Roxas had half a mind to throw the rest of his orange juice at the man when Naminé's shuffling entrance declared the presence of a witness. "Morning all!"

Luxord beamed, transferring his newspaper to one hand and holding his arms out to her. "How's my beautiful little girl doing on this fine morning?"

She laughed, leaning down to give him a hug. "Fine Dad. Where's the coffee?"

Their father shuddered, the newspaper re-opening. "I don't understand how you and your mother can drink that…that…ugh…"

"Mum made some," Roxas said, rolling his eyes. "Over by the window."

"Thanks Roxas."

Roxas tore the foil cover off the top of his yogurt. "Are you doing anything today, Naminé?"

His oldest sibling paused in the act of adding sugar to her drink, looking thoughtful but wary. "Well…did you need something?"

"Kinda, yeah." He balled up the foil and launched it at the trashcan, then watched as it hit the edge and bounced onto the floor. His father's blue eyes reappeared over the newspaper. Roxas went and picked it up.

"…what, exactly?" Naminé hinted when it became clear that Roxas was looking for some sort of response before he elaborated.

"I have a study group at noon," Roxas explained, dropping back into his seat. "So I sort of need a ride. Can you drop me off in like…" he glanced at the clock, "two hours?"

Her expression dropped slightly, looking a little guilty. "I'm sorry, Roxas. I'm meeting Zack at noon for lunch. Otherwise I'd take you."

"Oh," Roxas said, feeling slightly disappointed. "Okay then, no problem. Tell Zack I said hi. And that I didn't find how he switched the covers on my textbooks as amusing as he probably did."

Luxord snorted.

Naminé fought to hide a smile. "Will do."

Roxas sighed and stared at the clock over the stove, thinking. If he had to be there at noon and it took about forty-five minutes to get to school…wait…noon? He looked at his sister, dressed in her pajamas and a bath robe with bed head only a little better than Roxas' had been.

"Ummm…Nam?"

"Yes Roxas?"

"You said you're meeting Zack at noon…?"

"Yes."

"Do…do you realize what time it is?"

Naminé spun to look at the clock, the coffee sloshing dangerously in her hands. "Why? What is it?"

"…it's a little after ten, Nam."

She gasped. "Oh my god! I overslept! I had no idea it was so late! Thank you Roxas!" Naminé flew out of the kitchen, abandoning her drink on the counter.

Luxord shook his head. "Women…"

"What women?" Demyx asked, strolling into the kitchen and rubbing at his messy hair. Which, quite frankly, didn't look too much different from his everyday hairstyle. "Naminé's only one woman, Dad."

Roxas and Luxord rolled their eyes simultaneously.

Demyx grinned. "So Roxas, any more—"

"_No_," Roxas cut him off irritably, yanking his spoon out of his mouth. "Dad already asked."

His brother pouted. "Dad!"

"Sorry mate," Luxord said, turning a page in his paper. "Early bird gets the worm, you know."

"There was no worm!" Roxas snapped.

"Roxy, that's not the _point_," Luxord said patiently. "The point is—"

"Yeah, yeah, I'm a lazy bum," Demyx said, rooting around in the fridge. "You staying the whole weekend, Rox? Or are you heading back to school early?"

Luxord huffed at being interrupted, but brought his eyes to watch his youngest son.

"No, I'm staying. But I have a study group today I need to get back to campus for."

"Neat," his older brother said brightly, pulling out a container of apple juice and reaching for a cup. "You need a ride?"

"Yeah."

"And what class's it for?"

"Calculus," Roxas said, swirling his yogurt around in its cup. "He holds extra sessions on weekends for those of us who are—" he glanced at his dad. "Who, uh, need it."

Demyx's eyes snapped onto Roxas, suddenly intense. "Who does?"

"Professor Leonha—" He stopped, staring wide-eyed at his sibling.

Demyx's grin re-surfaced, and Roxas could read the intent residing in his eyes. His brother strode over to the doorway, his expression filled with the ultimate evil.

Roxas threw himself out of his chair, scrambling around the table and his father to reach the other teen. "No, Demyx, don't—"

"CLOUD!" Demyx shouted, his lungs, Roxas thought furiously, producing a volume that no human should be capable of. "CLOUD!"

Roxas sunk his nails into Demyx's t-shirt and wrenched it backwards, attempting to strangle the other using his own collar. "Shut up, Demyx, shut _up_!"

There was an unintelligible response from upstairs as Demyx dug his fingers under his shirt, trying to loosen the fabric cutting into his throat while pulling on Roxas' hair with his other hand. They stumbled heavily into the doorframe, Demyx clawing to free his voice and Roxas just clawing at him.

"Don't tell Cloud, or I swear I'll—"

Demyx lashed out with his foot as his face started turning pink, the strangulation starting to become effective over time. He connected solidly with Roxas' thigh just above the knee, sending a fiery ribbon of pain shooting through the younger teen's muscles. Roxas gasped at the sensation, staggering as his leg half-buckled and gave Demyx the chance to pry his fingers from his shirt.

"ROXAS NEEDS A RIDE TO HIS PROFESSOR'S _CALCULUS _STUDY GROUP! WANNA TAKE HIM?"

With a long-suffering sigh, Roxas draped himself over the kitchen counter, suddenly lacking the energy to even stand upright. Today was going to suck. Like yesterday.

In the kitchen's newfound quiet they heard the sound of a door slamming and someone thundering down the stairs, the unsteady sound making it clear they were either taking more than one step at a time, banging into the wall repeatedly as they came down, or both. Cloud's hand appeared on the doorframe before his body swung around sharply after it, his socked feet skidding on the carpeted floor, eyes locking with Demyx's.

"What? A ride? Calculus? Professor?" Sharp blue eyes darted instead to Roxas' form slumped next to Naminé's now cold coffee, their owner now fully alert. "You need a ride, Roxas?"

"Well…yes…" he muttered. "I can catch a bus though, it's okay…"

"Roxy, don't be childish," Luxord said, rousing himself from his decision to ignore the roughhousing that had been taking place moments ago. "Cloud can take you. You're not busy, right Cloud?"

"Not anymore," Cloud declared. "Come on, get ready Roxas. We'll leave in ten minutes."

Roxas frowned, pushing himself onto his elbows. "But it's not until noon…"

"I want to have a talk with your professor, I told you yesterday." Cloud raised an eyebrow at his youngest sibling. "Did you think I was kidding?"

"I was hoping…"

His brother ignored him. "Leaving in nine minutes, forty-six seconds," he said seriously, picking up the juice Demyx had left on the counter.

Roxas dragged his hands over his face, wishing he could just go back to bed and not wake up. Ugh. He shuffled to the door and hesitated in the doorway, watching the pleased smirk on Demyx's face. Hmmmm…

Making a split second decision, Roxas kicked Demyx in the same place he'd been hit, raced out of the kitchen, and sprinted for the stairs, knowing he only had a few precious seconds before his brother came after him. And Roxas' legs were nowhere near as long as Demyx's…

He heard Demyx hiss in pain behind him, and after a few all-consuming heartbeats, the footsteps started after him.

"Dammit, Roxas!"

Roxas grinned and shoved past his sister at the top of the stairs—"Sorry Nam, 'scuse me!"—and bolted to his room, slamming open the door, shutting it, and throwing himself against the wood as he snapped the lock into place. Demyx's fist smashed against it seconds later, his words vaguely muffled on the other side.

"That was dirty, Roxas!"

"You did it to me first!"

"You were _strangling me_!"

"You were going to tell Cloud! You told Cloud!"

"He would have found out anyway from Dad!"

"He's following me to my study group! It's your fault!"

"Well he's not staying the whole time, right? He said he was just dropping you off and talking to your professor, right?"

"…"

"Come on, Cloud's not the type to make stupid excuses just to stick around, Rox, you know that."

Roxas wandered over to his discarded backpack, thinking over Demyx's words. He had a point. Cloud was straightforward and to the point, and in public, a man a few words. He didn't do long conversations very well. So maybe…

"Okay," Roxas acquiesced. "Maybe it won't be too bad."

"See, Rox, it'll be fine! And Cloud says you have seven minutes and fifteen seconds."

Roxas scowled, deciding not to bring his skateboard for once and unlocking the door. He opened it to Demyx's bright face—until his brother pulled him into a headlock and noogied him within an inch of his life.

"Demyx, no! Not the hair!"

His brother just cackled in response and shot down the hallway to his own room, shutting the door with a bang. Roxas ran his fingers through his hair disgruntledly, trying to restyle it into its usual look and giving Demyx's door a black look as he headed back downstairs.

"You ready to go Roxas?" Cloud asked from the front foyer, foot tapping impatiently on the tile floor.

Roxas scowled. "Don't I have six minutes and twenty-five seconds left, or something?" he asked snidely, stomping into his sneakers. Actually tying shoelaces was overrated.

Cloud frowned at him, eyes narrowing. "Get in the car."

Roxas scurried past his older brother as Cloud called into the house that they were leaving, shutting the door and taking a moment to lock it up. He slid into the passenger seat, his backpack thumping into place between his shoes. Cloud came around the car and climbed into the driver's seat, slamming the door after him.

"So….what are you learning in calculus, Roxas?" Cloud asked, glancing in the rearview mirror as he pulled out onto the street.

The younger of the two raised an eyebrow. "…the volume of a solid rotated perpendicular or parallel to an axis of revolution."

Cloud blinked. Several times. "Yeah, that doesn't ring a bell."

"Didn't think it would." Roxas turned back to the window as Cloud turned onto the entrance ramp of the freeway and immediately floored it.

The majority of the drive was spent in silence with Cloud's window rolled down, effectively rendering all the time Roxas had spent on his hair that morning completely wasted. Roxas kept himself occupied by counting the number of near death experiences they narrowly missed as the car's speedometer flirted with ninety miles an hour.

"Roxas," Cloud started again, having to slow down as the traffic increased the closer they got to the city. "Where on campus to you guys meet for this tutoring thing?"

"We don't meet in his office," Roxas said flatly, staring boredly out the window. Despite the slight blurred effect due to Cloud's undeniable instinct to defy the speed limit, it was the same scenery he saw nearly every weekend.

"Well do you know where—"

"No."

Cloud's eyes narrowed. "Let me finish."

Roxas's eyes darted over to look at the dark countenance of his brother. Okay, yeah. He could do that. "Sorry."

"Do you know where his office is? He's got to have open hours, or something."

Slouching in his seat, Roxas glared at Cloud's hands on the steering wheel. "I guess," he muttered.

The older blond looked up at the rearview mirror, eyes darting back and forth, and promptly cut across three lanes of traffic, tires squealing, to reach the exit ramp. Roxas tried not to have a heart attack at the sudden feeling of moving sideways rather than forwards.

"CLOUD! You can't just do things like that! This isn't Fenrir!"

Cloud smirked at the mention of his beloved motorcycle before shrugging. "Old habits die hard."

"Your habits don't die at all and are going to kill me," Roxas scowled, hugging his seatbelt closer to himself. He doubted it would actually help, but it made him feel better.

"So what exactly does 'I guess' mean? Is that 'I guess I know where his office is' or 'I guess—'"

"I may have been to his office once a few weeks ago."

Roxas glanced at the other blond, noticing the twitch developing with his right eye. Oops.

"_Let me finish,_" Cloud growled, glaring at his brother.

"Umm…'kay."

"So you know where his office is?"

"I think so…"

"Yes or no?"

"….yes?"

"And does he have open hours?"

"Uhhh…I don't know—"

"It's a yes or no question, Roxas."

"…yes?"

Cloud nodded in satisfaction and showed his approval by running a red light, ignoring the honking that ensued from people who actually had the signal to go.

"Cloud…" Roxas moaned pitifully, dragging his hands over his face and likening him to a ghoul a few weeks too early for Halloween.

His brother frowned as he took a sharp turn onto the main street, almost hitting a bus just coming through the intersection. "What?"

"You were supposed to yield there," Roxas pointed out, silently apologizing to the wide-eyed people riding the public transportation.

Cloud looked briefly confused. "'Yield'?"

Roxas stared at him in disbelief.

His deranged driver kept his eyes on the road. "Right. I'll remember that next time."

They continued down the road for a ways in silence, Roxas wondering why the Department of Motor Vehicles allowed people like his brother to drive on public roads. He was a menace to the world, not just society.

"Is this the right parking lot?" Cloud asked finally, hands wavering on the steering wheel as he debated whether or not to turn.

"Yes, but there's a _stop sign there,_" Roxas said loudly before his brother could step on the gas, pointing at the red, octagonal object.

Both blonds flew towards the windshield as Cloud stomped on the brakes, eyes widening. "Where?"

Roxas could feel himself developing an eye twitch of his own. "Right there, _Cloud_."

The car remained stationary as the older male stared disbelievingly at the sign with the letters S-T-O-P emblazoned across the front of it. "That was _not_ there yesterday," Cloud declared firmly, brow furrowing.

"Yes, Cloud, it was. It's been there all year."

"You've only been here for a little over a month."

"…that's not the point."

"Well Demyx didn't say anything about it when I came to pick you up."

Roxas threw his hands in the air, ruffling his own hair in agitation. "That's because he drives like you do! He's an adrenaline junkie, he gets _high_ off of driving with you!"

Cloud snorted as he drove across the street and pulled into the closest parking spot. "You make it sound unhealthy."

His youngest brother graced him with a withering glare. "I like my internal organs right where they are, I'll have you know."

A roll of the eyes. "Okay Roxas. Because my driving _always _leads to disembowelment."

Roxas huffed unhappily as he opened his car door, ridiculously pleased to be out of the vehicle. His backpack followed moments later and he slammed his door shut moments after Cloud did the same.

Cloud lifted a hand tentatively to the back of his head in what Roxas recognized as a gesture of nervousness, the traitorous limb dropping back into place at his side when Roxas raised an eyebrow at him. "What?"

The college freshman smiled innocently, walking around the car to his brother. "Are you neeeeeeeeervous, Cloud?" he asked sweetly, hefting his bag over his shoulder.

Cloud glared at him, spitting rays of death from his irises. "No. Why would I be nervous?"

"Because it's Professor _Leonhart_, and you _liiiiiiike_ him, and he's _sooooooo_ good-looking—" Roxas began in a high-pitched sing-song voice. It wasn't very often he got to poke fun at Cloud.

His brother swiped at him. "Can it, shrimp. Let's go. Where's the math department?"

Roxas couldn't quite wipe the satisfaction from his face. Yes, it felt nice to be the persecutor for a change. "Right there, the first building. That way students have an easy escape route when their math class is over."

Cloud gave him a weird look.

He shrugged. "Just a guess."

Roxas lead the way along the sidewalk towards the math classrooms, paying no to attention to the scattered groups of students talking and giggling and _watching_ them. Well, Cloud really. He scowled. Just because Cloud was _taller_ than he was, and _muscled_, and wore those _stupid sleeveless shirts _even though the weather was starting to turn cold_—_

"What floor are the offices on?" Cloud interrupted his thoughts, peering around with interest as they entered the multilevel building. "These all look like classrooms."

Re-adjusting his backpack on his shoulder, Roxas nodded towards the staircase. "They're on the second floor. Professor Leonhart's is the first one, I'm pretty sure."

Cloud nodded and they headed towards the stairs. Roxas frowned at a sudden thought, glancing up at his brother.

"Hey, Cloud…you're just going to talk to him, right? That's all?"

The older blond turned to look at him as they climbed, eyes scouring his expression. "Yeah. It's not like I was planning on holding a tea party or anything, Roxas."

"A _tea party_?"

"It was just an example."

"A _questionable_ example."

"Whatever. Are you worried?"

Roxas hesitated, his hands tightening on his backpack straps. "Well…it's just that…this isn't high school anymore, Cloud. I…parents and siblings shouldn't be coming in to complain about grades and that sort of thing. It's just not done."

Cloud looked away, thinking. "You're right, Roxas. But I'm not here to raise a fuss about your grades. You need to find a way to bring those up yourself."

"Okay…so then…"

Cloud shrugged when they reached the top of the stairs and paused in front of a door marked _Professor Squall Leonhart_. Then he smirked. "I just want an excuse to talk to him."

Roxas sighed, looking up at the ceiling for salvation. To his extreme but not unexpected disappointment, nothing happened.

"Right," Cloud said, evaluating the door before him as though it could tell him about the man behind it. "Let's get started then."

xxxxx

Author's Note: And so, it begins! And yes, Roxas, this is just the beginning of the madness. Just wait. Anyway, there will be more Cloud/Leon interaction next chapter, I promise. Don't you wish Leon was a tutor for you? I certainly do. I might be passing calc if he was my teacher. Review and let me hear your thoughts on this chapter. I love hearing comments, ideas, and criticism from you all!


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: I don't own anything even remotely close to the value that the rights for Kingdom Hearts or Final Fantasy probably amount to. Let alone their actual rights. I just borrow characters to practice my writing and make other people laugh. Don't begrudge me that, ya?

Warnings: Ummm, the usual? Yaoi...eventually. Language. College stuff. Axel. You know. Oh, and the horrors of college calculus.

Author's Note: And here's chapter four. Yes, it's been some time, I'm sorry. This took a while due to…not so much Writer's Block, but more like Writer's Confusion. I knew what I wanted to happen, but wasn't really sure how to do it, which resulted in a stalemate that was incredibly frustrating. Worse than the Block, really. That and there was severe drop in the number of reviews for the last chapter, and I have to admit that lowered my spirits a bit. So please, once you reach the end of this chapter, REVIEW and give me SOME sort of comment.

xxxxx

Chapter Four

xxxxx

To Roxas's extreme disappointment, Professor Leonhart's voice called out for them to come in after the first knock. Cloud turned the knob and let Roxas enter first, which didn't make the younger blond feel the least bit better.

Professor Leonhart turned in his chair and looked up at them, his hands gathering some papers together.

The three men stared at each other for a good twenty seconds.

Then the brunet raised his eyebrows. "Can I help you?"

Roxas glanced at his brother to find Cloud looking back at him. He scowled. "We're here for the calculus study session."

The gray-eyed man eyed him for a moment before glancing briefly at the older blond. "That's in the library."

"I know." Roxas shifted his backpack uneasily, trying to look innocent. No, I am not here so my older brother can check you out, Professor, certainly not.

His professor just stared at him.

Roxas was hit with the sudden desire to turn around and go home. His failing grade didn't need help that badly. Really. Instead, he pointed a thumb at the man next to him. "Professor…this is my older brother, Cloud. Cloud, this is Professor Leonhart."

Cloud held out a hand to shake, which the other man took hesitantly with a bit of puzzlement. He cast his gaze over the blond, quietly evaluating him. "Just Leon will be fine."

Roxas watched them both carefully, catching Leon's expectant look. "Uhh, yeah…I think he just wants to see you teach."

The brunet tilted his head to observe Cloud, who had been silently examining him since entering the office. "'See me teach'…?" he repeated.

"No, not like that!" Roxas protested, feeling his heart speed up in panic. "He just—"

"Not like what?" Leon asked, frowning at Roxas.

Roxas paused. "I mean, like…he…wants to watch you _teach,_ not _watch you_ teach. Because that would be, um, you know, really weird, and…" He shut up when both adults started giving him odd 'are you feeling all right?' looks.

"So you're saying he wants to see how I run a class?" Leon clarified, leaning back in his chair and watching his student's face for an affirmative.

"Yes!" Roxas exclaimed. "Yes, that's what I mean."

The professor nodded and then looked at Cloud. "And is your brother mute?" he asked in a polite-sounding, but not really sort of way.

Roxas flinched. Maybe, because Cloud liked the man, he wouldn't hit him.

As predicted, Cloud narrowed his eyes but didn't raise a fist. "I'm not mute," he half-growled.

Leon looked vaguely surprised. Roxas hid a grin. Most people adopted that expression when they realized Cloud's voice was quite a bit deeper than his pretty-boy face implied.

"My brother's having trouble in your class," Cloud added, his blue eyes boring into Leon's gray-blue ones as Roxas's grin dropped. Uh oh.

The brunet nodded without breaking his gaze.

"And I was thinking," the blond continued with equally false politeness, "that maybe it has something to do with your _teaching style._" The words 'or lack thereof' were left unsaid, but still heard loud and clear by the entire room.

Cloud and Leon glared at each other.

Roxas groaned.

"Well," Leon said with distinct steel after a moment's pause. "I can't cater to everyone's learning style. But you're welcome to stay and observe today's session."

"Great!" Roxas jumped in before Cloud could open his mouth. "That's perfect. All he wanted, really. So we'll see you in a little bit then?"

Leon nodded slowly. "Twenty minutes."

"Good. Thanks professor," Roxas said hurriedly, ramming bodily into his brother and forcing him backwards towards the door. "Let's go, Cloud."

"Hn," Cloud muttered noncommittally, backing up at a relatively slow pace because let's face it: Roxas didn't weigh very much in comparison to his sibling.

The smaller blond tilted his head up to see what exactly was preventing his brother from moving faster than the speed of a worm in December, when he noticed that Cloud's eyes were narrowed and focused on something that was decidedly _not_ Roxas. A quick glance over his shoulder confirmed that yes, Cloud was locked in a stare-down of epic proportions with Leon, whose own eyes were similarly narrowed, and while their expressions didn't seem to portray dislike…it had that similar edgy, permeating vibe to it. The kind that let everyone in the vicinity know that some sort of testosterone-fueled showdown was taking place and had the tendency to spread like a disease.

Roxas rolled his eyes. Oh. Right. Alpha Male Dominance Syndrome. His roommate had that particular illness too.

He growled in annoyance and roughly shoved Cloud out of his professor's office, making sure to reach back and slam the door closed behind him to cut off their ocular battle of wills. Cloud continued to glare death rays at the wooden door.

Roxas punched his brother hard in the upper arm (one of the only places that wouldn't warrant some sort of retaliation) and glared at him. "Why did you do that?"

Cloud rubbed at his arm distractedly, frowning at Roxas. "Do what?"

Roxas scowled. "You insulted him about his own _profession._ That was low. You didn't have to do that, Cloud."

His older brother scowled right back at him. "He asked if I was _mute_, Roxas."

"Well, you were just standing there, not saying anything!"

"So that makes me a mute?"

"It makes you a moron for not saying something!" Roxas snapped, pulling tighter on his backpack straps. "The best way to get to know someone is by, you know, _talking_ to them. _Without_ mortally offending them."

Cloud's eyes narrowed dangerously, and Roxas knew he was in trouble, but he just couldn't keep his mouth shut.

"Why do you always have to cause problems like this? It's, I swear, the only thing you're good at. Besides _not talking._"

The clench of the older blond's jaw promised certain death. "_Roxas—"_

Roxas simply barred his teeth at his brother in a rather animalistic show of defiance and stomped off ahead and down the stairs like the teenaged adolescent he liked to pretend he wasn't.

Cloud trailed after him and Roxas could feel the edge of his brother's angsty fury singeing the back of his shirt. And then, as he banged out the doors and back into the sunshine, he realized that Cloud was his ride home, and in spite of the fact that Cloud was significantly more reserved in public than with his family, it didn't mean he was any less evil and therefore wouldn't make him pay dearly later.

Roxas debated the pros and cons of staying mad at Cloud for the duration of the short walk to the library and decided, in the end, despite Cloud's tendency to drive any motorized vehicle like it had the capabilities of a motorcycle, he really didn't want to end up walking home.

So when Cloud wandered (pun fully intended) through the library's automated doors, Roxas stomped back over to him. "Okay, look Cloud, when I said you were a moron—"

Cloud reached out one hand without looking and shoved the smaller blond into the wall, not even pausing in his walking. "Shut up."

"Ow," Roxas commented, a wry grin pulling at his mouth. That was Cloud's way of saying 'you're an insensitive ass, but I kind of _was_ being a retard, so I'll just cause you some temporary bodily harm and we'll call it even as long as you never bring this topic up ever again.'

He peeled himself away from the wall (which was cold and dirty and probably covered in cooties) and went to stand next to his assailant, who was examining the library's directory.

"So where is this session thing? This place has three floors," Cloud asked, frowning at the glass-encased sign of where everything was located. "Why does a library need three floors?"

"It's on the second floor, where most of the study rooms are," Roxas told him, turning away and heading for another flight of stairs. "And times have changed since you were in school, old man. Libraries aren't just for books anymore."

The older blond scowled at the idea of being an old man at the horribly wizened age of twenty-three. "Obviously. I see more computers here than books."

"And this is just the first floor."

"Joy. So are there a lot of kids that show up to these study sessions?"

Roxas frowned, running a hand through his hair as they ascended another staircase to the second floor. "No, not really. Professor Leonhart tries to just limit it to the ones that really need help."

Raising an eyebrow. "And you're apparently one of these kids?"

"Sort of."

"Is that a yes or no?"

Roxas sighed dejectedly. Some things were just in black and white for Cloud. "Yes."

Cloud frowned as Roxas headed across the carpeted floor to a long row of glass walled study rooms. "And how badly are you doing?"

The younger blond glowered at the floor, shoving his hands into his pockets. "Do we have to talk about this now?"

His brother glared at him. "You're doing that badly?"

"That's not what I said!"

"You said this study session was for people who 'really need help' and you're part of this group."

"Well, yeah, but—"

"Is that a polite way of saying you're failing the class?"

Roxas stared wordlessly at Cloud, trying not to look too shifty. "Uhhh…" he sputtered, his inborn reflex to cover his ass failing miserably. "I just…I…no, I'm not…"

Cloud stared at him, listening to his expressions rather than his words. "Then you're close to failing."

"That's—"

"Hey, Roxas!"

Both blonds looked up at the exclamation, identical blue eyes alighting on three other teens sitting together at a table. The brunette girl in pigtails was the only one with a textbook and a spiral notebook in front of her. She smiled at them as they approached. A slightly heavy, dark-haired boy sitting across from her glanced up as they approached from where he was rifling through his bag, smiling and nodding at them before returning his attention back to his search. The lanky, grinning blond on the girl's left raised a lazy hand in welcome.

"Ready for more brain-busting today, Roxas?" he asked, tilting his chair onto his two back legs and crossing his arms behind his head.

"I'm always ready for something new and exciting, Hayner," Roxas said dryly, pausing at the empty spot next to the dark-haired boy.

Cloud raised an eybrow. "I thought you didn't like change, Roxas," he remarked.

"I don't," the younger blond responded flatly.

"Roxas, is this…are you two…?" The dark-haired girl asked hesitantly, her eyes glancing back and forth between the two standing blonds.

"Oh, yeah, guys. This is my older brother, Cloud," Roxas introduced them, knocking shoulders with his brother.

Hayner raised an eyebrow. "Your name is _Cloud_?" he asked doubtfully, his expression disbelieving.

Cloud's eyes narrowed in challenge.

The other boy shrugged, squinting at Roxas's sibling. "That's just an…odd name for a guy."

Roxas kicked at Hayner's chair, making his friend start in surprise, eyes widening when his seat wobbled dangerously. "Hey man, shut up. You have a weird name too."

Hayner scowled at him as he settled his chair safely onto more stable ground. "We _all_ have weird names," he pointed out. "Even you, Olette, and you're a girl."

Olette rolled her eyes. "What does that have to do with anything?"

Hayner shrugged. "Maybe our parents all got drunk at the same party and made some pact to make sure their kids would never get to live normal lives. Starting with our names."

"That wouldn't surprise me," Roxas muttered. "Cloud, that's Hayner, Olette, and Pence—" he pointed to each of them in turn "—and they're in my classes and let me copy their notes."

"Sometimes," Pence amended, pulling out a notebook. "Hayner doesn't take notes."

"Note taking is for geeks," Hayner said derisively, crossing his arms.

"Yes, well," Olette said, giving her friend the evil eye. "_Geeks _actually _pass_ their classes, believe it or not."

Hayner snorted. "Geeks just have good memories, is all. They're just lucky."

"Which is more than you have, anyway," Roxas retorted, setting his bag on the table with a thud. "Did you even bring a pencil with you?"

"_Yes_," Hayner said indignantly.

"Paper?"

"Actually, I was planning on writing on the desks this time. You know, 'Susie hearts Harold' and 'this class sux', that sort of thing," Hayner said sarcastically.

Roxas rolled his eyes while Cloud watched in amusement.

"'Susie hearts Harold'?" Pence asked, looking incredulous. "Seriously?"

"You know what I meant," Hayner said, giving his friend a look. "The names weren't important."

"Suuure," Pence agreed, shaking his head. "Have you taken any notes this semester?"

"Why do I need to take any notes when I've got you and Olette?"

Olette gave Hayner a dirty look. "I already told you, I'm not letting you borrow my notes anymore. And Pence isn't going to either."

Pence looked surprised at this news. "I'm not?"

Olette glared at him with the power of a thousand angry women.

"Right," Pence said, swallowing and nodding. "Of course I'm not."

"Traitor," Hayner muttered, pulling his cellphone out of his pocket to check the time.

The pigtailed girl swatted him on the arm. "He's not a traitor. We're just making you do some decent work for a change. We helped you all through high school and it's about time you learned to do it yourself."

"But it's _hard_," Hayner whined, slouching down and putting his hands in his oversized pants pockets. "The whole 'listen and write at the same time' thing just doesn't work for me."

"It's an acquired skill," Roxas told him blankly. "Or so I've heard. You'll grow into it."

His taller friend glared at him. "What do you mean, 'you'll grow into it'? What's that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing," Pence said hastily, giving Roxas a disapproving look. "He just means it takes time to learn how to do it right, is all."

"Oh…" Hayner said haltingly, giving Roxas a suspicious look. "If you say so, Pence."

Roxas strove to keep a straight face.

Cloud looked at each of them in turn, observing their conversation and watching every movement. Olette in particular looked to be paying special attention to him, but it seemed more puzzlement than anything else.

"Are you all here for that calculus study session?" Cloud asked, directing the question to Olette.

"Yes," she responded firmly, gathering up her notes spread across the table. "Yes, we are. Hayner and Roxas need it, and Pence wants to raise his grade a little."

"So you two are passing the class, then?"

Pence nodded. "Olette has a B, and my grade's borderline passing."

Cloud turned and frowned at Roxas. "How are you two already failing the class if you've only been in school a couple weeks?"

Roxas ground his teeth together audibly. "College isn't the same as high school," he gritted out. "It's hard."

"Imagine that," Olette said dryly.

"And we completely bombed the first test," Hayner included his two cents, ignoring the girl next to him and drumming his fingers on the table.

"I mean, you do one little thing wrong and there goes the whole _freaking_ problem," Roxas fumed, crossing his arms roughly. "I understand all the crap behind the formulas and stuff, but I keep screwing up the algebra. It's not even the calculus I have a problem with."

"Well," Pence said uncertainly, glancing between Roxas and Hayner. "Practice makes perfect, I guess. That's what these sessions are for. To help with that, right?"

"Whatever," Hayner scoffed, rolling his eyes and leaning back in his chair again.

"And it gives you and Roxas some time to practice your note-taking," Olette added, eyeing Hayner's chair as though she'd like nothing better then to tip it over backward.

"You _do_ take notes?" Cloud asked Roxas, raising an eyebrow.

"Of course I do!" Roxas exclaimed, turning on Cloud with an aura of righteous indignation. "I'm not stupid like Hayner."

Hayner kicked out with his foot and nailed Roxas in the shin. "Hey, I'm not stupid! I just hate math!"

"Doodling in the margins of your notebooks does not count as note taking, Roxas," Olette said primly, giving both boys The Look.

Roxas glared up at her from his bent-over position examining the beautifully forming bruise on his leg. He could feel Cloud's glare freezing the left side of his face.

"Roxas."

"Yes Cloud?"

"Tell me you take notes in class."

"I take notes in all my classes," Roxas recited dutifully, thinking of ways to maim both Hayner and Olette.

Cloud stared at his youngest brother, who was obviously transforming into a drug-addicted, sex-crazed, gang-oriented hooligan before his very eyes. This was how it always started. The lack of notes. Doodling. Oh if only he'd taught Roxas the fine art of note taking and outlining back in high school.

Roxas raised his eyes slowly, straightening his spine as he went, to nervously glance at Cloud's face. "Why are you looking at me like that…?"

"Don't lie to me, Roxas."

"Well I can't do both," Roxas said irritably, scratching at the back of his head. "Either I'm not doodling in my margins or I'm not lying to you. One or the other."

Cloud scowled at him. "Are you _wasting_ your class time?"

"They all started out as diagrams, I swear!" Roxas protested, ripping open his bag and yanking out his spiral for calculus. "Look, see! They all have numbers!"

Cloud moved his head back slightly so his eyes wouldn't cross. "That looks like a collage of letters and numbers."

Roxas hit Cloud on the shoulder with his notebook. "They're _diagrams_ for my _problems_," he snapped.

"They look like the problems of your problems," Hayner snickered, avoiding the swipe his blond friend took at his head.

"You need to keep your notes organized, Roxas, or they won't be of any use to you," Olette said with a frown, expression worried.

"Olette," Cloud said intently, leaning slightly forward on the table so he could meet her eyes. "Could you teach Roxas how to take real notes?"

Her green eyes lit up at the request. "Of course! It's not that difficult, really."

"Cloud!" Roxas said in horror, gaping at his brother. "You can't just—I'm not going—"

"Shut up, Roxas," Cloud told him indifferently. "If she's willing to help you, you better damn well accept it."

"Yeah, man," Hayner added with a smirk. "You need all the help you can get."

"I don't think anyone needs more help than you, Mr. Malta."

All eyes darted over to see Professor Leonhart coming to a halt at their table, the hated textbook of the numerical Martian alphabet settling with a bang next to Olette. Hayner made a face at the use of his last name.

"Hello, Professor," Pence said with a sigh, staring sadly at the book's cover.

"We're just about ready to start," Leon told them, giving them all a once-over. "Have any of you started on the homework yet?"

"We had homework?" Hayner asked, looking scandalized. "Why did we have homework?"

"We _always_ have homework, Hayner," Roxas told him, engaged in his own staring contest with Leon's textbook. He would win today. He would not let the stupid math formulas triumph over him yet again. No, today was his day.

Olette stomped down on Hayner's chair as she gave him one of her patented evil looks, jolting the wooden piece of furniture onto all four legs and practically throwing him onto the table.

"Ow, Olette, geez!" Hayner complained, rubbing his chest where it had made friends with the edge of the table.

She smiled sweetly at him, rising from her seat. "Time for class. Let's go, boys."

xxxxx

Author's Note: Hooray for another finished chapter! The wonders of Strife and co. in an actual calculus class. Heaven help us all. XD My first time writing the Twilight crew, and I suppose it turned out okay. I know Olette comes across as a bit straight-laced, but she is hanging out with a bunch of pig-headed boys. Lol. So all of you who faved or alerted this story…please leave a review this time too! It does wonders for motivation, it really does. 'Til next time!


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: I don't own. Stop forcing me to remind myself; it's depressing. Talk about losing the game…

Warnings: Ummm, the usual? Yaoi...eventually. Language. College stuff. Axel. You know. Oh, and the horrors of college calculus. And now Leon and Cloud. Beware.

Author's Note: Extra long chapter for you all…I've been working on Euthanasia and Fragile (which are now posted! *points you in their direction*) and this ended up getting pushed to the wayside. So I compensated. XD I'd apologize, but I'm actually really pleased with how both of those, and this chapter (sorta…) turned out. So read on and review!

X-x-X-x

Chapter Five

x-X-x-X

Leon opened the door to one of the study rooms with a key from the library's front desk, watching his students file dejectedly through the door and take their seats around the large table in the center of the room. Cloud took a seat at the corner of the table and slightly behind Roxas, probably so he could breath down his neck in the event he did anything Cloud didn't approve of. Roxas sighed. This felt like…kindergarten. Calculus class in kindergarten. Ugh.

They waited another ten minutes in relative silence, a few more students trickling in as the clock's minute hand inched towards twelve. Leon leaned against the wall next to the whiteboard, watching as his students took out any materials they thought they might need over the next hour and a half.

A tan, blond-haired boy came in and sat next to Pence, blinking repeatedly at the blank board on the wall in front of him. "Hey, did we have homework?" he asked, looking around and frowning at the other students.

Olette sighed, propping her head up with one hand on the table. "When do we _not_ have homework, Tidus?" she asked, staring at him with a vaguely disappointed look.

Tidus glanced sideways out the door, an incredibly suspicious look for someone who was supposed to be trying to avoid Olette's wrath, in Roxas's opinion. "Um…never?" he said hopefully.

She just stared at him, her eyes slowly narrowing.

"Right, well, I haven't started it yet," Tidus said hurriedly, bending down out of Olette's sight to do something to his bag.

The door clicked shut with a finality that inspired immediate terror, the head of every college student in the room, with the exception of Olette, swinging around to stare at the source of the sound. Leon met their uneasy gazes with a cool expression.

"Let's get started then," he said.

Roxas shook the shoulder of the girl on his right. "Come on, Selphie. Class is starting."

Selphie's brown head rose slowly to look at him blearily. "We don't have class today, Roxas."

Roxas stared at her, fighting not to smirk. "What are you doing here, then?"

She froze, her eyes darting around everyone else at the table watching her in varying states of amusement. Then understanding dawned across her features. "Oh."

"Um…are you okay, Selphie?" Olette asked hesitantly, frowning in uncertainty.

"I just haven't had my coffee yet," Selphie grumbled, crossing her arms on the table and resting her chin on them.

"Maybe you'll be sane for one of my classes for a change, Tilmitt," Leon remarked, moving to stand on the empty side of the table. "Did any of you bring your tests today?"

"I did," Olette said promptly.

Leon nodded. "And?"

"I did."

Hayner started violently and whirled around in his seat to look beyond Pence and Olette. "What are you doing here?" he snapped with deliberate rudeness. "You're not in this class!"

Six pairs of eyebrows rose simultaneously in Hayner's direction.

"I've _been_ in your class, Chickenwuss," Seifer Almasy said disbelievingly.

"No you haven't! You never said anything!"

"Our class is at seven-thirty in the fucking morning," Seifer replied, lounging back in his chair. "_No one_ says anything_._"

"Now that you've all been properly acquainted with each other, let's keep going," Leon said blandly. "Were there any specific areas you lost points in?"

Roxas frowned, trying to remember. "All of them."

Hayner snorted in laughter. Roxas elbowed him hard in the side.

"That's because you're friends with Chickenwuss there, and his stupidity is contagious," Seifer drawled, sneering at the both of them.

Hayner stopped snorting.

"That's not true Seifer—" Olette started in Hayner's defense.

"I'm not stupid, you freak," Hayner snarled, leaning on the table to glare at his taller nemesis.

"Too bad you got no proof to back that up," Seifer challenged, ice blue eyes flashing as he sat up.

"Are you trying to start something?" the shorter blond demanded, half-rising from his seat. "You wanna fight?"

"You don't even know how to throw a decent punch," Seifer said with a taunting laugh. "It wouldn't be much of a fight, _Chickenwuss_."

"_Hey,_" Leon said sharply, dropping his book on the table with a deafening BANG that made everyone jump. "That's great you both hate each other. Fuel your anger towards the calculus, if you don't mind."

Roxas glanced back at his brother to find Cloud eyeing Seifer stoically, his face closed-off, eyes trailing over his form. Blue eyes snapped onto Roxas when he noticed he was being watched.

He gave his youngest brother a blank look. _Does that usually happen?_

Roxas shrugged. _Eh. Outside of class, usually._

Cloud shrugged back at him.

Roxas turned back around as Hayner dropped back into his seat, huffing angrily like a stampeding bull.

Olette patted his shoulder sympathetically, glaring rays of painful estrogen death at Seifer.

"Oh! I know what I need help with!" Selphie exclaimed, ignoring the animosity going on at the other end of the table. "Partial fractions. How the hell do you have a _partial_ fraction? That's like…a fraction of a fraction, or something?"

"No, not exactly," Olette disagreed. "You're breaking down an equation to make it easier to integrate, right?"

"How do fractions make _anything_ easier?" Hayner complained, looking as though the very concept of fractions was personally offensive.

"Seifer, shut your mouth," Leon interjected before the blond could make any sort of comment. Seifer just rolled his eyes. "Partial fractions are a way to simplify a problem to make it easier to integrate," Leon corrected, nodding at Olette and opening his Teacher's Edition book with his own copy of the test tucked between the pages. "Anyone else have problems with this?"

"Me," said everyone except Seifer, Olette, and Cloud.

Leon exhaled heavily, staring at his sad excuse for students, his hair fluttering. "Did any of you pay attention in class last week?"

All the boys in the room conveniently found some inanimate object to stare at rather than their professor's face.

"Let's start with number five then." Leon pulled a blue dry-erase marker out of his pocket and turned to the board. "The integral of five x squared plus three x minus two, over x cubed plus two x squared dx."

"Okay, wait," Tidus said abruptly, raising a hesitant hand. "I'm already confused."

Leon looked over his shoulder at the blond. "All I've done is write the problem down."

"Right. But can you go really slow? Because I get confused really easily between steps and stuff."

The professor nodded. "What do we do first here?"

Cloud and Hayner stared blankly at the board.

"Move on to the next problem," Hayner said promptly.

"And the next. And the next…" Seifer said sarcastically.

"Shove it, Seifer," Hayner snapped caustically.

"We already know this is partial fractions problem," Leon told them, tapping the board. "So what's first?"

"Well, how do you know this uses partial fractions?" Selphie asked, staring nervously at their professor.

The brunet raised an eyebrow. "Would you like to use some form of substitution or integration by parts, then?"

They all stared at the problem on the board.

"No way…" Hayner said slowly, shaking his head.

"Good," Leon told them, looking at each of them in turn. "Because it wouldn't work without a computer."

Hayner and Roxas exchanged a disgruntled look.

"Do any of you have your notes? We've been over this several times."

"It's just early; we're tired," Selphie said, making a face.

"It's noon," Olette told her, giving her a strange look.

"Yeah, you're just caffeine free for once," Tidus smirked, grinning at her.

"I only have one coffee a day," Selphie protested, throwing her pencil at him.

"Alright, focus," Leon scowled, crossing his arms imposingly. "You're not middle schoolers. I'm not willing to waste my weekend if you're not going to pay attention. This is why you're having trouble in my class."

His students directed dismal eyes at the table. And their notes. And each other.

"First step," Leon said commandingly. "Now."

"You have to simplify the denominator first. X squared times x plus two."

There was a brief pause. Then everyone turned slowly to stare at Cloud as though they had never seen him before. Which most of them hadn't.

"Yes…" Professor Leonhart agreed slowly, writing Cloud's answer on the whiteboard.

Roxas stared at his brother, aghast. "_You_ know _calculus_?"

"Actually, that's just factoring, from algebra," Pence pointed out, flipping through his notes for his section on partial fractions.

"So? He _knew_ it," Roxas said in mystified awe, shoving Hayner to shove Pence and ignoring the resulting complaints.

Cloud frowned at him, glowering. "I'm only one year out of college, Roxas. I do remember a little math."

"All of you should know how to factor a denominator by now," Leon said gruffly, eyeing Cloud with something close to interest.

The blond man's eyes cut across to look out the window, one hand rising uncomfortably to tug gently at the short hairs on the back of his neck.

Roxas rolled his eyes. Stupid nervous habits. Cloud had an odd way of preening.

"Alright, what's next then? Someone who's actually in my class, please."

"Separate the factored denominator," Seifer drawled, slouching back in his chair and crossing his arms. "And because you can simplify x squared into x times itself, you need x as a denominator too."

"Show off," Hayner muttered as Leon wrote x, x squared, and x plus two as three separate denominators on the board.

"Okay," Leon said, moving off to one side so they could see what he'd written. "What do we put as the numerators then?"

"A, B, and C," Roxas replied promptly, feeling pleased with himself. Hayner stomped on his foot. Roxas stomped on Hayner's right back. Pence rolled his eyes. Olette and Cloud glared at both of them.

"Hayner," Leon interrupted their childishness. "What do we do now?"

There were a few moments of silence as Hayner hesitantly examined the board, his ears steadily turning pink the more time passed. "Um…you…I think you have to do something with a…a common denominator…or something…?"

The professor nodded, looking at the board. "And what's the common denominator here?"

"It's uh…uh…x squared times x plus two."

"Good. And what do we need a common denominator for?"

"So we can add the fractions," Selphie pointed out. "Duh."

"Not quite," Leon contradicted her. "We want to eventually integrate this, not add it together. So what is it for?"

"Since you broke down the denominator, you have to do the same thing to create different numerators that are proportional to the new denominators."

Silence fell in the study room once again as everyone stared at the board, then slowly snuck not-so-subtle side looks at Roxas's older brother. Leon crossed his arms and narrowed his eyes. Cloud didn't look away this time, firmly meeting his gaze from under his bangs in a way that let it be known there was no love lost between the two of them.

"Would you like to teach the class, Mr. Strife?" Leon said finally, his voice low and…generally very much not pleased.

Cloud leaned back and also crossed his arms. Roxas could see his brother was having some serious trouble keeping his face from smirking at the other man, but he doubted anyone noticed beside himself and Leon. Since they both seemed to have the same range of facial expressions and all.

"No," Cloud responded after a moment. "That's fine. Go on."

"I understand you wanted to sit in on this study group, Strife, but I'm going to have to ask you to _only_ do that," Leon continued, his voice chilly and unamused. "Providing answers is not part of that privilege, and isn't benefiting them."

Hayner muttered something about having a contrary opinion.

"I'm sorry…"

Roxas's head whipped around to stare at his brother in disbelief, his brain already accusing his ears of failing in their one and only major duty, besides looking cute. Cloud did _not _just say those words.

"…I didn't mean to—"

Roxas's eyes widened. Oh heavens above, he did.

"—but I just thought I should help them out since they obviously have _no idea _what they're doing, when this is subject material they have supposedly _already covered_ and _been tested on_."

Roxas covered his face with his hands, set his elbows on the table, and groaned. "Cloud…" he muttered despairingly.

No one said anything as Tidus and Selphie watched Cloud with wide eyes, Pence gazed out the window, Olette stared uncomfortably at her notes, Hayner glanced between Cloud and Leon, and Seifer looked as though Christmas had decided to show up not just early but _twice_ this year.

A fleeting smile passed over Leon's face, and Roxas was hit with the strong desire to never see that expression ever again. "True," the brunet conceded with an inclination of his head. "Maybe if my students here showed up to class every day the way they're supposed to, and glanced at the textbook every once in a blue moon, we wouldn't be wasting my time here going over things we have _already covered_ and _been tested on._"

Hayner and Roxas cringed and quickly exchanged glances, hoping Leon wouldn't look at them.

Cloud ignored them both and set his jaw defiantly, sparing a glare for Roxas who tried to look as not-guilty as possible, and returned his iron gaze to Leon. "Maybe he would show up to class if he felt you were capable of teaching him something."

Leon rested both hands on the table and leaned forward towards the glowering blond, both Selphie and Roxas instinctually backing away out of his 'You are disturbing my male dominance here' aura. "Maybe your younger brother thinks he's still in high school and needs a babysitter, Strife," Leon said softly, his eyes shining with a cruel smile. "I wonder who he gets that from. But I, thankfully, am not a babysitter for the less motivated students in my classes, and I am not getting paid any extra for these little tutoring sessions despite my not having a teacher's aide like other professors, for reasons I shall not disclose, and if what I am doing here is not good enough for you, or your family, I have no objections to him—" the brunet nodded at Roxas, who sunk down in his seat "—dropping my class and re-taking it with someone else next semester. It's not my problem. Is there anything else you'd like to bring to my attention while you've still got it, Strife?"

Cloud snarled without words and snapped out of his chair, the piece of furniture clattering against the wall behind him as he graced Leon with one of the ugliest looks Roxas had ever had the misfortune to set eyes upon. Including that time he and Demyx had smashed up Cloud's first motorbike by riding it around the homemade jump course they'd set up in the backyard two years ago.

As it was, Roxas's brother slammed a palm down on the table. "I want a word with you when you're done here," he growled darkly. Turning, he swept out of the room and slammed the door after himself.

After a couple seconds of quiet, Leon spoke. "Roxas, I'll speak with you when this session is over."

Roxas eyed him resentfully. He didn't need a baby-sitter…he wasn't that bad…

"_That_ just made my day," Seifer said with a sideways smirk at Roxas, tilting his chair onto its two back legs.

"Shut up, Seifer," Hayner spat angrily, twisting around to glare past Olette and Pence. "You think you're so—"

"All of you _shut up,_ or _get out._" Leon's voice snapped over them like a whip, and his gaze could have burned holes in their retinas if they'd had the balls to meet his eyes. "We've been here for almost an hour and we have yet to solve a problem. Nearly all of you are unprepared, don't show up to class, and take advantage of the closest distractions. If you're not creating one yourself."

"Professor—" Olette began timidly.

"Be quiet."

Hayner glared at Leon as Olette lowered her eyes.

"None of you are going to say a word for the last twenty minutes unless you're giving me an answer or asking a relevant question. Is that clear?"

Seven heads nodded their understanding.

"Good. Now what do we do with these?" the professor asked curtly, gesturing at the three letters on the board.

Twenty minutes seemed to crawl by in the relative silence of the rest of the lesson, no one speaking unless they had to and keeping their eyes on their papers or Leon's writing.

"So. Everyone understand what to do with trigonometric integrals, then?"

Depressed sighs and groans filtered through the room, led by Hayner, who was resting with his face smushed against his textbook.

"An answer, please."

"Yes."

"Yeah, I get it."

"Integrating trigonometry thingies…yay…"

"Ewwwwwwwwwww…"

"Great," Leon said firmly, nodding and closing his book. "Now get out and go home. Homework's due on Monday. Roxas, I need to talk to you."

Hayner clapped Roxas on the shoulder as he stood, stretching awkwardly as he raised his other arm over his head. "Tough break, man. You want us to wait for you?"

"Nah," Roxas decided, shoving his notes back into his textbook and pushing the resulting mess into his bag. "I'm gonna go home with Cloud after this. You guys go ahead."

Olette smiled sympathetically at him. "Okay, Roxas. We'll see you tomorrow then? For the chem. session?"

"Yeah…whatever," the blond grumbled, sulking moodily at the table.

"Bring your textbook this time, Professor Zexion really chewed you out for forgetting it last time…" Pence reminded him, shouldering his book bag.

Roxas made an unintelligible noise that might have been acknowledgement.

"Bye Roxas, have a good day!"

"See you tomorrow, Roxas."

"Later man. Move it, Seifer, you're blocking the door."

"Not my fault you don't fit through it, Lamer."

"What did you—!"

"Roxas," Leon's voice cut in through the squabbling that followed, drawing Roxas's gaze back to his professor. "I want to talk to you about your brother."

Roxas scowled. "Just ignore him. That's what I do."

Leon chose to ignore him instead. "And I want to apologize for what I said about you. I'm sure you don't need a babysitter; I was out of line to say that. But my other point still stands: This isn't high school anymore. Do you understand what I'm saying?"

"Yeah…" Roxas muttered, shoving his hands in his pockets and slouching down in his seat. "Come to class, do the homework, stop playing MASH with Hayner instead of taking notes…I get it. I'm sorry."

Leon frowned at him, crossing his arms over his chest. "You play MASH in class…?"

Roxas flushed, sitting up and glaring at the brunet. "I already said I was sorry, okay?"

Leon shrugged and decided to drop the subject. "Okay, fine. Now what is your brother doing here, if he's out of college?"

The blond glanced out the glass windows of the study room, looking out at the remaining occupants of the library. He didn't see Cloud. Good. "Cloud wants to…evaluate my professors, I think."

"Evaluate…?" Leon said slowly, leaning against the wall behind him. He blinked a couple times in remembrance. "He was here yesterday to pick you up, wasn't he? Was he checking up on your other professors—"

"No," Roxas said shortly, shifting uncomfortably in his chair. "He was just there to pick me up. With my other brother."

"Is it because of your grades, that he thinks maybe my teaching style isn't working for you?"

"Probably not," Roxas sighed, playing with the strap of his bag on the table in front of him. "Cloud just doesn't know what else about you he can use to get a reaction. He doesn't think I'll pay attention in class if my professors are too good-looking."

Leon raised an eyebrow in inquiry.

"Cloud thinks I'm not paying attention in your class, which is why my calc grade sucks right now."

His professor's blue-gray eyes stared at him blankly. "So your brother thinks…"

The blond glanced up at him. "Yeah, Cloud thinks—" Roxas froze, horror crashing over him at the realization of what he'd pretty much just implied. He clapped a hand over his mouth. "Oh my god, I did not just say or allude to anything that my brother may or may not be thinking about your looks. I didn't say anything! He's totally not attracted to tall, dark and pretty—er, handsome. He's not into guys, or he wasn't until yesterday, and I don't think—oh crap, he's going to kill me…"

Roxas watched the confusion intensify on his teacher's face as he scrambled to his feet and grabbed his bag, his brain deciding that taking flight would be the best thing to do since his mouth couldn't keep itself shut.

Leon's eyes narrowed in anger while Roxas shoved his chair out of the way. "Roxas, don't tell me he was here—"

"Nope, he was totally here for the calculus!" Roxas said loudly, diving for the door. "We're done talking here, right? Right? Cuz I'm pretty sure I don't have anything else to say, and I know Cloud wanted to talk to you, so I'll just go get him—" he wrenched the door open "—and we can pretend this conversation never happened because I _didn't say anything. At all._"

Roxas darted out of the room before Leon could say anything else, catching sight of Cloud glowering by the bookshelves in the biography section.

"Done in there?" Cloud asked as Roxas approached, his words sounding rigid and impatient.

"Well, yeah," Roxas agreed hurriedly, searching his brother's face for the faintest glimmer of potential mercy. "And if he mentions anything about—"

"I'll be back in a second, Roxas."

"No, Cloud, wait—"

"Wait here, Roxas."

"Ah…umm…"

Cloud walked away from him, and Roxas could see Leon watching them both through the glass.

"I don't like you," Leon started without preamble, his arms still crossed and slightly stiff, and then the door closed.

Roxas sighed as Cloud lifted his chin and retorted something in reply that made Leon scowl. His brother really sucked at the whole flirting thing.

He observed the two men anxiously through the glass, too edgy to sit, his right leg jumping as though he was counting time for music. Leon wouldn't tell Cloud what he'd said, would he? Roxas could guarantee he'd be dead before he and Cloud made it back to the car, if his professor did. Cloud didn't take very kindly to people, especially family, intruding in his personal life.

Roxas froze as Leon and his brother glanced out the room's glass panels at him, some sort of intangible ice water pouring over his mind and feeling not unlike a deer caught in the headlights of an oncoming vehicle. He waved hesitantly in an effort to assuage any potential rage heading in his direction. He could be cute when he wanted to and he knew it. Natural selection and an inbred survival skill, most definitely.

He nervously watched them argue for a few more minutes before Leon stormed out, gray eyes cutting over to Roxas as he crossed the floor and then vanished down the stairs. Roxas frowned as he turned back to look at the study room, the door still ajar, and approached with caution to peer around the doorframe.

"Cloud…?"

Cloud was leaning with both hands on the chair Roxas had been sitting in, his fingers tapping a faltering beat against the backrest as he kept guarded blue eyes locked on the table.

"Cloud, what happened?"

His brother straightened slowly with a heavy sigh, sliding his hand along the wood while he raised his half-lidded gaze to meet Roxas's. "What did you tell him?"

Roxas felt his stomach drop below his shoes while he stared at his brother's face. Leon wouldn't have…he didn't…would he? "I…I didn't say anything, Cloud, I just…" he was stumbling over his words, but he didn't do anything wrong, or at least he didn't mean to. "He asked me some questions, and I answered them, but I didn't…"

Cloud simply let his eyes rove over his brother's face, evaluating all the little giveaways that told more then anything Roxas could have said. He nodded after a few moments and moved past Roxas out of the room, one hand running through his hair.

Roxas swallowed, biting his lip in worry as he hurried after his older brother. "Cloud, I'm sorry."

Cloud didn't say anything in response for several long moments while they made their way down the stairs. "We're going home, Roxas."

The younger blond exhaled dejectedly and let himself fall behind, scuffing reluctant feet along the floor and hefting his schoolbag over his shoulder. If Cloud didn't kill him just by driving home…Demyx would when he got there.

X-x-X-x

Author's Note: Tell me what you think. Because honestly, reviews motivate me to write faster. Otherwise I'll write and just not post. And yes, I am capable of doing that. So review! Review!


	6. Chapter 6

Disclaimer: I don't own it. Or them. I just borrow characters to practice my writing and make other people laugh. Don't begrudge me that, ya?

Warnings: Ummm, the usual? Yaoi...eventually. Language. College stuff. Eventual Axel. You know. Oh, and Xigbar.

Author's Note: Chapter six here! Someone has expressed their concerns on whether this fic is going to fade out into hiatus-land. Let me assure you, not going to happen here. The chapters here are simply starting to get longer as the story progresses, and as a result you're going to have to wait longer for updates. In that respect, I apologize.

I want to make some things clear about this chapter. I've referenced .project107's fic The Unfamiliar in here. I am NOT poking fun at—okay, I sort of am, but certainly not with any malicious intent. Hopefully she doesn't mind. I adore that story, and have told her that several times, along with her fic Marked and Hunted (which I am dutifully and patiently waiting on an update for, because it will be SO worth it). XD

If Demyx and Roxas's conversation is hard to follow, and you will know what I'm talking about when you get there, it is because they are not listening to anything the other is saying. AT ALL. That's why. And Xigbar always manages to show up in my KH fics…I'm not sure how to stop that…So go read and review!

xxxxx

Chapter Six

xxxxx

"You did _what?_" Demyx cried in dismay, sitting on Roxas's bed an hour later.

Cloud had gone straight up to his room when they'd returned home, ignoring Demyx's worried inquiries and slamming his bedroom door closed behind him. It had taken Demyx about fifteen seconds to track down his younger brother, force the door open, and maul Roxas within half a centimeter of his life until he agreed to spill what was wrong with Cloud.

"I didn't do anything!" Roxas protested, pulling one of his pillows over his head and curling up into a ball. "I sort of alluded to it, but not really, I mean, it's not like I came right out and said it, right?"

His older brother whacked him over the head with his second pillow.

"He would have found out anyway..." Roxas grumbled, his fingers combing moodily at his hair.

"You just don't know how to keep a secret," Demyx said with mock disappointment and shaking his head.

"Like you're one to talk," Roxas said derisively, rolling over onto his stomach. "You're the one that told all my friends I was obsessed with SimpleBake Oven when I was younger!"

Demyx frowned in confusion, scratching at his head. "But you were…"

"That's not the point!" the smaller blond exclaimed, throwing his pillow at Demyx's face. "It was just a phase; I grew out of it! I never lived that down! Hayner still asks me to bake him cookies!"

"It was not just a phase," Demyx protested, pulling the pillow away and hugging it to his chest with a pout. "You still have it in your closet."

"Yeah, well, I haven't used it in—wait," Roxas said, glaring incredulously and pushing himself up onto his knees and sitting in the seiza position. "You've been in my closet?"

Demyx edged away from him with distinct wariness. "…maybe."

"Demyx!"

"I'm sorry! I was looking for my Build The Universe kit I had and I thought Mum moved it because she keeps giving you my things! It was totally accidental!"

"Ugh," Roxas groaned, covering his face with his hands and flopping over onto his side. "I was really hoping no one would notice that…"

His older brother rolled his eyes and shoved Roxas's face into the quilts. "Oh, you're nothing but a drama llama. Enough about you. How's Cloud taking things?"

"Cloud's probably going to ignore me for the rest of my life." Roxas's muffled voice told his quilts.

"I don't know about that," Demyx said, vaguely flipping a wrist at Roxas. "Maybe just the next couple of years or so."

"Demyx…"

"Well, you know Cloud…" Demyx continued with a sigh, lightening the pressure on Roxas's head and playing with his brother's hair. Roxas decided it would be futile to attempt fixing it while Demyx was still in the room. "He has this sort of unconscious inability to let go of things until he finds a way to 'fix' it. You know?"

Roxas stared blankly at his closet on the other side of the room. "You mean like how Cloud didn't talk to us for seven months until he got Fenrir, after we crashed his first motorbike? And then it was like nothing ever happened?"

"Uh…yeah, Roxas. Sorta like that," Demyx agreed slowly, scratching at his hair. "Except you kinda sort of maybe crashed his love life this time, without my help."

Roxas groaned and sat up again, snatching up a pillow and crushing it to his chest with the full intention of sulking. "So this time do you think he'll ignore me for the next couple of years?"

"Maybe just until he starts going out with Leonhart, or something."

Roxas paused, picking at the corner of his pillowcase as he thought back to the study session. "I don't…I don't think Professor Leonhart likes Cloud very much, Demyx."

Demyx was staring at him when he glanced up from under his bangs, his blue-green eyes surprised. "Really?"

"Yeah…there was some definite hostility there."

"Oh man…wait, wait, you mean that whole Alpha Male Dominance Syndrome thingie?"

"Exactly."

"Did he insult him?"

"Yup."

"A couple times? Over the same thing?"

"Yup."

"Huh, he really does like him."

"Remember when Cloud picked that fight with Zack when he first met him in sixth grade, even though Zack was a sophomore?"

Demyx burst out laughing as Roxas smirked at the memory of his revered eldest brother's first real fight and the resulting black and blue marks Cloud had received as a reward. It was one of the few times he could remember his mother being truly furious with his dad for supporting 'that awful violent behavior' when Luxord had remarked that Cloud had had his first forage through manhood with a hint of pride.

"How could I forget that? It's like Cloud never grew out that 'pick on and tease the ones you like' phase. But you really think Leonhart doesn't like Cloud?"

Roxas rubbed his nose with a fist and thought about it. "Yeah. I'm pretty sure. Although I don't know what it looks like when he _does_ like someone…"

"Huh…" his older brother mused thoughtfully, leaning back against the wall behind him. "That's weird…"

"Yeah, sort of, but I mean Cloud wasn't really doing his best to be friendly at—"

"Most people are attracted to him because he's good-looking—"

"—all. It was sort of like he went in there with the _intent_ to—"

"—with the blond hair, blue eyes. He's the quiet type with a badass motorcycle—"

"—pick a fight and cause problems and ruin my life. Which isn't at all—"

"—that has a _name_, which is sorta odd for his personality. Maybe that only works on girls—"

"—like Cloud, so maybe Cloud's just a little rusty with the whole dating thing—"

"—because he's never dated a guy before, right? And you can't approach a guy like you would a girl, but I'm sure _he_ doesn't know—"

"—and maybe he just needs some time or whatever to think things over cuz he obviously has no idea what he's—"

"—that. I'd think that was common knowledge but I think Cloud just has no practice picking up guys, so—"

"—doing. He needs some help before he screws up completely, cuz you know he will, so—"

"—someone should talk to him."

"Exactly."

"Exactly."

Demyx and Roxas looked at each other, nodding in agreement and clearly possessed with a wisdom far beyond their young years.

"I'll go get Naminé," Demyx said brightly, sliding off the bed and traipsing over the clothes scattered across the carpet on his way to the door.

"Wait," Roxas said with a small frown, rewinding their mish-mash, not-really conversation in his head. His older brother turned to watch him expectantly.

"What, Roxas?"

The smaller blond blinked, setting aside his pillow and slowly climbing to his feet. "You…you know how to pick up guys?"

Demyx's face blanked out as he stared at him, silent for a few moments as Roxas scrutinized his expression. "Why…why would you think that, Roxy?"

Roxas's eyes narrowed. Demyx had called him by the horrid pet name started by Naminé that only their father still used. And Roxas allowed it because to be honest, it sounded pretty cool with a British accent. "Well, cuz you said Cloud didn't know how to pick up guys, like…like you _do_ know, or something."

"Don't assume things, Roxy," Demyx said uneasily, actually looking slightly troubled. "That's not very nice."

"Why are you talking around it instead of just saying 'no'?" The younger blond asked, peering at his brother suspiciously. "And you keep calling me 'Roxy'. Are you hiding something from me?"

"No," Demyx said immediately, backing to the door and feeling behind him for the doorknob.

"Yes you are!" Roxas exclaimed with a scowl, pointing an accusing finger across the room. "You've 'picked up' guys before, haven't you?"

"Shhhhhh!" Demyx hissed, glaring at him as he fumbled to open the door without looking at it. "Be quiet! And it's not called 'picking up guys', it's called 'dating in secret'. But no, I haven't done that! At all! But some people do it."

"You know…" Roxas frowned again, "I'm not getting very trustworthy vibes from you. I think you have. Have you really—"

"No!"

"Demyx, I'm just—"

"I haven't! I'm going to get Naminé!" Demyx fled from the room and closed the door behind him with a snap.

Roxas stared at the door with faint confusion and frustration, doubt niggling at the corner of his thoughts. Demyx was a horrible liar, unless he was under severe pressure in very rare circumstances, and now was not one of those times. Now that he thought about it, unlike Cloud…Demyx had never really brought any girlfriends home. He'd gone out to places with a few girls, like that Rikku chick…but maybe…was it possible that none of those had been actual dates? That he'd just been 'hanging out', like Roxas did with his friends, especially Hayner? And why was this only just now occurring to him?

Worrying his lower lip, the blond followed the same path Demyx has taken to get to the door and opened it carefully. He hadn't really thought that Demyx was seriously attracted to guys before, despite his happy obsessing over his chemistry teacher, and had taken Demyx's declarations as more of a joke. Demyx liked attention, and Roxas had figured this was just another way to get it. But what if Demyx hadn't been joking…?

And if he hadn't known that about Demyx…did that mean Cloud was…?

He edged out into the hallway, listening for his brother's voice drifting up from downstairs. Cloud's door was at the other end of the hallway, the dark black paint appearing ominous and morbid in the light of his newfound realizations.

How much did he not know about his brothers? And what about Naminé? Was her relationship with Zack just a farce? Was EVERYONE in his family gay? What if his parents weren't even, in truth, married? What if he and his siblings were all really adopted? What if he was actually living in a computer-simulated reality, the Matrix style, because the world couldn't handle all the new orphans produced by a devastating war that he just couldn't remember (Yes, I went there)? _What if _he was just _paranoid?_

"Roxas?"

Roxas glanced up just as his sister gently touched his face, her brow furrowed with concern. "Are you okay, Roxas?"

He raised a hand to re-spike his hair and nodded, his eyes darting to Demyx who was standing nervously behind Naminé. "Yeah, I'm fine…I was just staring at Cloud's room. I didn't mean to upset him…"

His sister just smiled. "Don't worry about that, Roxas. I'll go talk to him."

"But weren't you meeting Zack somewhere…?" Roxas asked, giving her a puzzled look. "What are you doing home?"

"I said that was just for lunch, Roxas. It's almost three now." Naminé patted him on the arm and turned in the direction of Cloud's room. "You know Zack's training keeps him busy. Now let me talk to brother dearest."

The two boys watched their sister walk down the hall to stand outside Cloud's room, her head tilting up to look at the dark-colored door. She sort of looked like an innocent young girl waiting outside the gate of hell, Roxas thought briefly. Then he realized that was stupid. Cloud wasn't a fiend of hell, he was just angsty.

"Cloud," Naminé called after a few seconds of silent waiting, her voice soft but clear. "Are you all right? Can you open the door so I can talk to you for a moment?"

Roxas and Demyx waited with bated breath for a response. Although Cloud usually didn't respond to either of them when he was in one of his moods, he always responded to his older sister. And their parents, but that was sort of a given.

"I don't want to talk."

The boys glanced at each other after Cloud's words. Demyx shrugged. Roxas crossed his arms.

Naminé clasped her hands in front of herself and dipped her head briefly. She coughed quietly to clear her throat. Stared at the carpet outside Cloud's room for a second. Looked back at the black painted wood.

"Cloud, _open the door._"

The lock clicked open after about five nanoseconds.

Naminé smiled at Demyx and Roxas's dumbstruck faces and slipped into Cloud's room, closing the door gently behind her.

Demyx sputtered in indignation, his mouth moving but not really forming words.

Roxas just shook his head. "It must be a female power."

"_Obviously,_" Demyx said with a sniff, turning on his heel and heading back to the stairs. "Hmph. Stupid Cloud."

The younger blond rolled his eyes and followed his brother. "Cloud has to be forced into doing a lot of things, Dem. He's better for it, and all."

"Yeah, whatever."

"'Ello, lads? Anyone home?"

Roxas blinked at the familiar voice from downstairs. "Dad?"

Demyx galloped down the stairs and careened towards the front door, Roxas close behind him.

"Mum and Dad went grocery shopping not long after you and Cloud left," Demyx told him as they reached the foyer.

"You went grocery shopping?" Roxas asked his father, his mother coming through the door behind him.

"Of course I did, Roxy, you know I like to help your mum out with such things…" Luxord said brightly, handing Roxas a brown paper bag full of boxed goods.

"Don't let him fool you," Aurora responded calmly, moving through the front entry like the queen of the house that she was. "He just likes seeing how much money I'm spending."

Luxord made a face at the words but made no effort to deny them. "Aurora, love, you don't have to phrase it like that…"

"You're just money conscious, dear. No need to be ashamed. We're much better because of it," Their mother said comfortingly, sweeping past them out to the car again. "And get that other thing out of the car."

"What thin—Oh!" Luxord leaned back out the door, Demyx holding it open for him as he picked up two plastic bags. "Xig, get out of the car!"

"Wait, what? You brought Xigbar home?" Roxas asked, a spike of horror driving through him, his bag of groceries crinkling as his fingers tightened around it.

"Ran into the bloke outside the store and figured, 'Well, haven't seen the old boy for a while; why not invite him over for a bite, eh?' Good times with him, let me tell you. Did I ever tell you about the time he played Juliet in Shakespeare's play? I never thought the same way about that work again…"

Roxas fled into the kitchen. His worst nightmare was coming true. Or one of them, anyway. The problem was, although he didn't get along so well with Cloud, Xigbar _liked _Roxas. Roxas didn't see why, since he spent most of his time running away from the other man (and Roxas suspected that was probably the reason), but days when Xigbar came to visit always, _always_ ended badly for Roxas.

Always.

"Hey, Big-Little Dude! How's the schooling going?"

"Xiggy!" Demyx's voice rose happily in answer. "School's totally awesome! You should totally come visit me there! I'm by the beach!"

"Sweet! That's for sure the school I shoulda gone to…"

"Then at least you would have had a reason for failing most of your classes," Luxord joked with a smirk, coming into the kitchen with more bags and effectively cutting off his youngest son's escape route.

"Hey man, they just didn't understand my awesomeness, where we went," Xigbar retorted amidst the sound of more groceries being moved. His voice was closer. Roxas glanced around the kitchen. It was possible he was still small enough to fit into the pantry…

Luxord crossed to the kitchen table and set his armfuls of groceries down, and there—there!—was maybe a five second time span for Roxas to slip out of the room before he'd be trapped in here with his father's best friend. Run!

He was just beginning to feel the elation of having escaped the ultimate terror when he collided with something _very_ solid, and Roxas wasn't stupid, he knew it was the said ultimate terror, because he never managed to escape it in time. Damn.

An odd gold eye stared down at him with barely veiled amusement, Xigbar's body purposely positioned to block the doorway. "Little Dude! You got somewhere to be?"

Roxas, feeling distinctly cornered, tried to back away without _looking_ as though he was attempting a hasty retreat. "Errr—uh—no, not really, I just got back…"

"Oh, from where?"

The blond hesitantly met Xigbar's inquiring gaze, trying to keep his eyes from darting to the conspicuous eyepatch he was wearing. "Calculus…study group…"

Xigbar made a face. "Yeah, I remember those numbers. Nasty fuckers, the lot of—"

Aurora, with her magical powers of woman's intuition and motherly omnipotence, appeared behind him and hit him hard upside the head with her purse. "You watch your tongue in this house," she said warningly, her mouth drawn into a tight thin line.

Luxord winced in sympathy and headed straight for the freezer.

"What do you have in there, woman! Stones?" Xigbar's voice rumbled, both hands on his head and slightly bent over in his pain.

Aurora's eyes narrowed.

"Here, Xig, take this," Luxord said hurriedly, shoving a bag of…something…frozen at his friend before turning to the slowly angering woman in the kitchen. "He didn't mean anything by that, love, it's a lovely bag. Did Demyx come in with you?"

"Jesus," Xigbar complained, tenderly holding the frozen bag of mysteriousness to his head. "No wonder you stopped cussing all of a sudden back in college, Lux. This _hurts._"

Luxord cast a nervous look at his wife and half-forced Xigbar into a chair, patting his shoulder in an expression of camaraderie. "Let me nip out and grab Demyx. I'll be back in a jiffy."

Roxas swallowed and stayed at his place by the counter, feeling that staying small and insignificant would most likely be the best course of action to ensure his survival. Until his mother glared at him. Then he started sorting through the bags on the table.

"So…calculus, eh? How's that workin' for ya?"

Roxas really wished he would drop the subject. Calculus had no right to take over his day like this.

"Uh…fine, I guess," Roxas answered, pulling out a couple boxes of teas and crackers.

"You like it?" Xigbar asked somewhat skeptically, shifting the frozen bag of what Roxas could now see was broccoli more towards the back of his skull.

"No," Roxas said bluntly, shoving his dad's tea into a cupboard.

"Good," his dad's friend said with approval, nodding. "Means you're totally normal, dude."

Stomping footsteps in the hall made Roxas scurry around to the other end of the table. Experience had taught him that things often got nasty when there was more than one angry person in the house.

Demyx burst into the room, with Luxord rubbing his temples as he followed after him. "You guys locked me out!" he cried indignantly, huffing as he set his cargo next to Xigbar. "What did I do to deserve that? I was trying to help you guys!"

"We were trying to cut you out of our conversation about calculus, Demyx," Roxas informed him sarcastically, shoving a box of cereal to the back of the pantry to make way for more _necessary things, _like his Little Sephy snackcakes. "I'm sorry you figured that out so quickly."

Demyx stuck his tongue out at him. "This wouldn't happen to be the _same _calculus Cloud got to witness today, would it?"

Roxas glared at him, silently wishing his brother would have his fingers smashed by a rebellious cabinet door. "Maybe…"

"No way!" Xigbar exclaimed, twisting around to stare at Roxas. "_Big Dude _knows _calculus_?"

"Well, Big Dude knows algebra at least," Roxas muttered, feeling he was beginning to understand the source of Cloud's angstiness. This family and its friends was a deadly combination of weird and _nosy._

"Cloud went with Roxas to his calc study group today," Demyx informed Xigbar in a stage whisper. "Wanted to see what it was like."

Xigbar nodded wisely, his bag of frozen vegetables following the motion. "Ah, the mighty power of calculus…"

"No," Demyx corrected, waving a bag of angel hair spaghetti at his father's friend. "The mighty power of the _calculus professor._"

"Ah, makes more sense now, dude," Xigbar said with a nod. "Sex appeal never fails. So is she hot?"

"Xigbar!" Aurora snapped, frowning at him as her fingers inched towards a bag of whole wheat bread.

"Actually, it's a guy," Roxas said dully, feeling as though yesterday was going to try to repeat itself.

"Oh." Xigbar glanced at Luxord, who wasn't looking at him, and then raised an eyebrow at Demyx. Demyx glanced at his dad too and shrugged. Roxas narrowed his eyes at both of them. There was information to be tortured out of people, there.

"I think it's a fine thing Cloud's found an educated man as a role model," Luxord said with a firm nod at the milk he was placing in the refrigerator. "Maybe he'll go through a bit more school, get his masters degree."

"Yeah…" Demyx said doubtfully, looking shiftily at Luxord out of the corners of his eyes. "A role model…"

"Speaking of models, man," Xigbar said loudly, removing his improvised icepack from his head and banging it on the table. "One of my friends just got a job at…whatever place it is you go to." He waved a hand at Roxas. "Pretty sweet, huh?"

"What does that have to do with models?" Demyx asked in confusion as his mother handed him yogurt, which he tried to put in the cabinets before realizing it was _not_ the refrigerator.

"He's a model, dude," Luxord's friend said in a 'duh' tone of voice, tossing his ponytail. "Or he was. That's the point. Duh."

"Great," Roxas said with an obvious lack of interest. "I'll be on the lookout for him." Roxas had every intention to avoid him like the black plague.

"I think you guys will totally hit it off," Xigbar was saying, ignoring Roxas's overwhelming enthusiasm like the pro he was. "Maybe he'll end up teaching one of your classes or something, Little Dude."

"Sure he will," Roxas returned flatly, debating whether or not he should steal Xigbar's frozen broccoli and stick it back in the freezer out of pure spite. "How does a model end up as a college professor anyway?"

Xigbar gave him a look that spoke volumes of how much he was doubting Little Dude's intelligence at the moment. "Uh…you go through school…? Was that a trick question?"

"Who cares?" Demyx asked eagerly, pulling out a chair and sitting down across from Xigbar. "That's awesome! What's his name? What's he teach?"

Xigbar winked at Roxas's older brother and tapped the side of his nose. "That's a secret, Big-Little Dude. Don't want your little bro getting all overexcited and stalking him."

Demyx snorted with laughter while Roxas glared daggers at the back of Xigbar's silver-streaked head.

"I always did think you were the stalker-type, Roxy," Luxord commented absentmindedly as he set the kettle on the stove. "I worry about you sometimes."

Aurora just sighed and shook her head at the nonsense she was hearing.

"What, why?" Roxas exclaimed incredulously, turning around to stare at his father, who was getting out a cup and an Earl Gray teabag. He pointed at his own face with a scowl. "Does this look like the face of a potential stalker?"

To Roxas's surprise everyone stopped what they were doing to examine him, which only made the short hairs on the back of his neck stand up and uneasiness creep along his spine.

"Uh…" Roxas said uncertainly into the quiet that had descended on the kitchen, although he could hear the soft tread of feet upstairs. "Never mind then. I'll just go—"

"Who's a stalker?" Naminé asked confusedly from the doorway, a subdued-looking Cloud standing behind her. Then his eyes fell on Xigbar.

Xigbar grinned at him and waved. "Hey, Big Dude! Prince!"

"Princess," Naminé corrected her nickname primly.

Cloud stared at him blankly for several long seconds. Then he turned disappeared into the hallway.

"Cloud, get back in here," Luxord said irritably, giving his eldest son a dirty look as he reappeared behind Naminé. Cloud just heaved a silent, resigned sigh.

"Wait, Roxas is a stalker?" Naminé persisted, her eyes darting around the kitchen to settle worriedly on Roxas. "You're stalking someone?" she asked him.

Roxas rolled his eyes to stare at the ceiling, wishing the floor would open and deliver him to Wonderland. That place had to be more sane than here.

Demyx interrupted him before he could say anything. "Nah, Roxas is more likely to _be_ stalked than to stalk anyone else, I think. Cute face, and all."

"Okay," Roxas started irritably, crossing his arms. "When I asked that, it was more—"

"Yeah," Xigbar agreed with Demyx, eyeing Roxas with a piercing eye. "Definitely with that face. Now Big Dude here…" The older man pointed at Cloud (Aurora swatted the hand to the table seconds later) and shook his head slowly with regret. "_He_ is a stalker in the making."

Roxas watched with slight amusement as Cloud's left eye started twitching.

"Cloud's not a stalker," Naminé said dismissively, laying a gentle hand of warning on Cloud's arm and smiling at Xigbar. "He doesn't follow people around. He just goes out of his way to intercept them."

"Cloud's not so good with being stealthy or subtle," Roxas said dryly, giving Cloud a look.

His eldest brother just stared flatly back at him. "Neither are you, Roxas."

Roxas immediately went back to organizing the granola bars in the pantry. He could feel the knowing, sort-of-accusing-but-not-really-anymore-because-Naminé-talked-to-him-now-so-it's-okay gaze of each of his siblings boring into his back. Him, Roxas the Shamed. May the higher powers have mercy on his life.

"I think only the women retain subtlety in this family," Aurora stated with a smile at her youngest son. "Would you get the pans out for me, Roxas?"

"Sure Mum."

"Hear, hear," Naminé muttered softly, pushing Cloud towards a chair next to Demyx. Cloud sat obediently and continued glaring at Xigbar. Cloud had never really gotten along with the other man, although Roxas suspected that had something to do with his younger dress-wearing days.

"Subtlety is overrated," Xigbar declared with a careless wave of his hand. "Blunt force works way better with most things."

"Not with relationships," Naminé protested, her hands resting on the back of Cloud's chair. "Those require cooperation and patience. Rome wasn't built in a day."

Xigbar snorted. "That's bullshit, Prince"—Luxord managed to intercept his wife before she could reach any heavy, readily-available objects—"besides, we're not talking about Rome, and the only reason it wasn't built in a day is because they totally weren't working fast enough. Women just need to handle things the way men do."

"Hey mate, please don't send Aurora into a rage," Luxord cut in, trying to seem as though he was _unintentionally_ boxing his wife into a corner so she couldn't reach the kitchen knives. "You get to leave when it gets late. I don't."

Xigbar's eye darted over to Aurora's severely displeased face behind his best friend. "Oh. Sorry, Mrs. Lux."

"Pray tell how you solve things the manly way, Xigbar," Naminé asked with a raised eyebrow, looking distinctly unimpressed.

The long-haired man shrugged. "You go in, ask what's wrong, they get irritated you're sticking your nose in their business, you throw a few punches, and BAM, problem solved. Just like that."

Cloud crossed his arms and nodded like an all-knowing being. Naminé rolled her eyes and walked off to the cabinet where the cups were stashed.

"That's how Cloud solves his problems," Demyx admitted thoughtfully, looking at his older brother. "Seems to work okay for him."

"That's how Hayner and I work out our issues," Roxas added, thinking back on all the spats he and his best friend had gone through. "Works well enough."

Naminé sniffed delicately and pulled a container of juice out of the fridge. "Well I doubt that's how your professors handle things, Roxas," she said.

"Yeah, especially Zexion. He doesn't seem like the brawling type…" Demyx mused with faraway eyes, tapping a finger against his chin.

"Well I'll ask him whether he beats on his friends to solve his problems tomorrow then, and we can settle this matter once and for all," Roxas commented with definite sarcasm, getting some plates down for everyone to use.

"Oh yeah, you have your chemistry study group tomorrow, huh?" Demyx said, straightening up in his chair and giving his younger sibling an evil grin. "Why don't I give you a ride?"

"_No,_ Demyx," Roxas snapped, banging the dishes down on the counter. His mother gave him a reprimanding look. "You are not coming with me. I don't need your help. At all."

His brother pouted, set his elbows on the table, and put his chin in his hands.

"Aw, it's okay, Big-Little Dude. Don't be sad; Little Dude's just being mean like usual…"

"Now, now, Roxy, you don't have to be so harsh," Luxord intervened, frowning at the both of them. "Why not let Demyx give you a lift? You two don't get to see each other so often since you're off at other places. You should spend the extra time you do have together, before it's gone."

"But Dad, he'll _stay,_" Roxas explained, trying not to look too desperate to keep his brother from joining him. "_That's_ what I don't want."

"Well it's just a study session, eh?" Luxord said, looking at his youngest son for affirmation. "I'm sure the professor won't mind a whole bit. Gives you two a smidgen more bonding time. What time's it at?"

"Ten o'clock, but Dad, we don't _need_ any more bonding—"

"But Roxy, I hardly ever get to see you since I left for school!" Demyx cried, shooting up from the table to smother Roxas with a clearly unwanted hug. "Don't you want to spend time with me? Your big brother? I know you think I'm busy all the time, but I can definitely make time if it's for my favoritest little brother!"

"I'm your _only_ little brother," Roxas's muffled voice grumpily told Demyx's shoulder.

"Such selfless brotherly love…" Xigbar said with a sigh, pretending to be touched by such a display of emotion.

Luxord nodded in approval. "See, Roxy? Demyx wants to spend more time with you while he still can. He'll take you to that study thingamajig tomorrow. No worries, lad."

"You," Roxas muttered to his dramatic older brother who still had him wrapped in hug that was rather similar to wearing cling-wrap, "are pure evil."

"Born and bred, Roxy-baby," Demyx whispered smugly back. Roxas could feel the grin forming on his sibling's face.

"Why do I feel so used?" Roxas moaned, dropping his head on Demyx's shoulder. "It's not faaaaaaaaair…"

"It's a burden all youngest siblings bear…" Xigbar said solemnly, meeting Roxas's eyes with certainty, and Roxas almost thought he had someone who understood—

"Xig, you're an only child," Luxord said shortly, snapping him on the arm with a dish towel. "Stop spouting wisdom that doesn't apply to you."

"Youngest, only, same diff, dude," Xigbar shrugged easily, rubbing the faint red blotch below his shirt sleeve with slight resentment. "Jeeze, man, what happened to peace and love? You're all so violent here."

"Strife instinct," Cloud said shortly, snatching up Xigbar's bag of thawing vegetables and rising from his seat to put it away.

"Amen to that," Luxord agreed, folding the towel up neatly and setting it next to the sink. "Survival of the fittest."

Roxas rolled his eyes. "More like 'Survival of the craziest'."

"Hey man, crazy guarantees you'll be in a textbook somewhere," Xigbar said, accepting the cup of tea his blond friend offered him. "Just look at me."

"You're not in a textbook," Demyx scoffed disbelievingly, patting Roxas on the back and pulling away.

Xigbar waggled a finger at him. "My life's not over yet, Big-Little Dude. You just wait."

"I believe you," Naminé said in agreement, pulling out placemats from a drawer by the oven.

"Alright, settle down, all of you," Aurora spoke up, turning to look at her family and Xigbar. "Now who's hungry?"

"Meeeeeeeeeeeeeee! Guests first!"

"Food, yay!"

"Oh, it's done already, love?"

"I guess."

"Do you want some help with that, Mum?"

Roxas just wished dinner would last forever and tomorrow would never come. Having Cloud come with him to school had been survivable…but Demyx…? Demyx was almost impossible to keep in line when he was visiting a new place. The youngest blond stared forlornly at his empty plate, wishing it could go tomorrow in his stead.

Damn it. This was all Xigbar's fault, obviously. His presence was like a Call of the Wild that demanded his family release their inner mental patients (some people call it the Inner Child. Sadly, such normality is not the case here).

For now he would eat, because he would need his energy and whatever unimpressive strength he possessed. Then he would plan what to take with him to chemistry: distractions for Demyx (crayons and markers usually worked), extra paper, books, his music player, his textbook.

And if all else failed…well…there was always the universal wonder of duct tape, right?

Author's Note: There you go. Chemistry study session next. *racks brain for rapidly fading chemical knowledge* Ugh. Everyone seems to want to know what Leon said to Cloud, and I know that wasn't answered here. That was intentional. Bwahaha. All in good time…review and I'll write more of this instead of doing my poli sci research paper! XDXD Just kidding, Meta…honestly…_;; REVIEW.


	7. Chapter 7

Disclaimer: I'm tired of repeating this. I don't own Kingdom Hearts or Final Fantasy, etc, although this pains my soul. This disclaimer applies for the rest of the story. Period.

Warnings: If you haven't been reading this in the previous chapters, you'll probably never know. Ignorance is bliss, I guess.

Author's Note: All the apologies in the world couldn't make up for the time gap here. I don't know what to say, except that my life has drastically improved in the last few months. So, uhhh…and I've been a bit distracted by Star Trek. So read and review, if you're still out there. REVIEWS ARE THE LOVE NOTES THAT REMIND ME I SHOULD BE WRITING INSTEAD OF DOING OTHER THINGS.

xxxxx

Chapter Seven

xxxxx

Roxas, like most students suffering under the intense crushing workload of a new academic environment and plagued by a deep reluctance to actually _do_ said workload, valued his sleep. Roxas slept in as long as possible, often forgoing breakfast: he slept after he got back from his classes, he stayed up until the early hours of the morning Insta-Messaging his friends and thinking about doing his homework, and then slept for the last few hours before his first class. The weekends were no different. Sleep still made the world go round.

It was a different story whenever he came home, however.

"Rise and shine, Sleeping Beauty!" a voice cried from next to his bed, and a bolt of terror jolted through him at the realization that the owner of that voice was going to force him into consciousness against his will and make him face a new day. Roxas really didn't think he could handle that right now.

Sure enough, a wave of chilly air swept over him as his blankets vanished, leaving the blond huddled on the sheets in the tightest fetal position he could manage.

"Oh Roxas, my Roxas! You have chemistry to study in ninety minutes!"

"Hnnhmphrthmnnnrph," Roxas responded to what his brain vaguely recognized as his older brother's horrifically cheery voice.

"Okay, when I said ninety minutes, that actually means that you have like thirty minutes to get in the car. Cuz it's eight-thirty. Or I'll leave without you."

Roxas raised his head like a turtle hesitantly coming out of its shell, peering at Demyx's form with sleepy, rapidly-blinking eyes. "You can't leave without me," he said slowly with what was supposed to be an accusatory tone and really just ended up being slaughtered by a yawn. "It's _my_ study group."

Demyx just gave him a sweet smile that looked a lot like Naminé, only with some definite sinister undertones. "You keep thinking that, Roxas."

Roxas rubbed his eyes, the better to glare suspiciously at Demyx, and crawled off his mattress. "How much time do I have?"

"I said, thirty minutes."

"DAMN IT, DEMYX," Roxas shrieked, throwing himself across the room and clawing the door open. "YOU KNOW IT TAKES ME THAT LONG JUST TO DO MY HAIR!"

"But you looked so angelic while you were sleeping, Rox…"

"DO I LOOK ANGELIC TO YOU NOW?"

"Well…" Demyx said with a put-out pout, following his younger brother out of the room. "No, not really. Not anymore."

"WHY DIDN'T YOU WAKE ME UP EARLIER?"

"Because I thought—"

Down the hall, another door slammed open with all the power of an infuriated twenty-three year old and bounced off the wall, revealing seething blue eyes and the messiest blond bedhead that Roxas had ever seen before in his life. "_SHUT THE HELL UP."_

Roxas and Demyx didn't even try to deny the deep-seated younger-brother instinct to cower in terror in the presence of older-sibling anger.

"_If I hear ONE more word and I CAN'T GET BACK TO SLEEP, I will HUNT you both down, GUT you, RUN your still-living bodies through a MEAT GRINDER, and feed you to the HOMELESS and that will be the good deed for my LIFE._ UNDERSTAND?"

Demyx nodded wordlessly for the both of them. Cloud gave them one last sleepy-eyed glare that was somehow more fear-inspiring than when he was fully conscious and slammed back into his bedroom.

Yes, Cloud was what most normal people considered a light sleeper, and he didn't take being woken up any time before ten very kindly at all. A 'morning person' was not a phrase you could use to describe him. Their parents and older sister, as was evidenced by the lack of any other sound after this rather life-threatening outburst, were the opposite, quite capable of sleeping like a certain enchanted princess in a particular fairy tale that a well-known Disney movie had made quite popular.

Roxas let out a wordless growl of frustrated rage and locked himself into the bathroom, going through the fastest shower of his life (while trying not to imagine himself being fed through a meat grinder) and attempted to gel his hair into its usual fashion in as little time as possible. He shot out of the bathroom and back into his room, passing Demyx (sitting serenely on the top step of the staircase, pulling at threads in the carpet and watching Cloud's bedroom door with a hint of nervousness) who called out "twelve minutes, Roxas!"

Muttering some very choice un-angelic words under his breath as he rifled through his closet, Roxas pulled on a pair of beige jeans, a black long-sleeved shirt and a white sleeveless hoodie. He snatched up his backpack and skateboard and grabbed his sneakers, half-hopping out into the hallway as he tried to put them on, to Demyx's extreme amusement.

"Ready?" Demyx asked, giving the carpet one last pull.

"Yes," Roxas grumbled, tucking his skateboard under his arm. "Anything for breakfast?"

Demyx thought about it as he stood up, finally shrugging at his brother. "We can swipe some of Mum's power energy diet bar things on the way out?"

Roxas thought that sounded like as good of an idea as any, really, as they climbed down the stairs. Demyx vanished into the kitchen while Roxas continued on to the front door, reappearing moments later to shove the food into his brother's hand while humming a tune Roxas didn't recognize.

"Is it possible for you to drive any less maniacally than Cloud?" Roxas requested dismally, ripping open the wrapper of a peanut butter-chocolate weight-loss bar. Because he totally needed to lose weight.

"Only because you asked so nicely," Demyx told him in a cheerfully accommodating way, opening the door and gently pushing Roxas through it.

And looking back on it, Roxas supposed, Demyx did do a better job than Cloud. He only ran one red light (because he wasn't paying attention while he tried to make Roxas search for the candy he KNEW he had in the glove compartment) and did ninety-five on the freeway (and who _doesn't _do that?). Quite an accomplishment in the Strife family, that was. When they reached the campus of Radiant Twilight University, they had about ten minutes before the session started.

"So where do we go?" Demyx asked, craning his head around to take in all there was to see as they walked out of the parking lot. "I've never been on campus before here; this is pretty cool. Where do you guys go for the study thingie?"

"He holds it in his classroom, because the chemistry study sessions are usually pretty big. But we've gotta get there fast, because Professor Zexion is one of those professors who locks their door once class starts. Unless he's already in the middle of writing something on the board, which has been my saving grace a few times, actually."

"Oh Roxas, way to not be punctual."

"I could say the same for you."

"So, is his classroom close by?" Demyx asked, ignoring the fact that he and his brother shared the same tendency to run late.

"Sort of. It's in that big building beyond the Humanities classrooms, over there." He pointed to a large stone building with one of the walls covered in a creeping curtain of dark green ivy.

Demyx stared at it doubtfully. "That's the chemistry building?"

"That's the Ansem E. Wise building for physical sciences, actually," Roxas corrected him. Once they reached the sidewalk, he switched over to his skateboard, pushing off a few times to get going.

"…it looks like it should be used for writing gothic novels, or something," Demyx insisted, wrinkling his nose at it.

"Don't judge a building by the aura it gives off," Roxas said loftily, heading towards the large, old building at a pretty quick speed.

Demyx gave him an odd look as he easily matched Roxas's pace without even needing to jog. Roxas scowled. Damn long legs…

"That is one of the weirdest pieces of advice I've ever heard in my life," his brother informed him, his eyes drifting across the large stretch of grass to the other buildings. "Are those buildings—"

"Not now, Demyx. We've got six minutes to get up there—" he pointed up at the approaching building, vaguely around third-floor height "—before Professor Zexion decides to close the session."

Demyx's blue-green gaze followed Roxas's finger, his eyes widening as he stared up at the third floor windows.

"Yeah, all the way up there," Roxas said huffily. "It'll take us about that long to get there."

Demyx frowned, looking from the building, to his brother, and back to the building. "Well…what are we walking for, then? Come on, Roxas!" And without any other warning, Demyx took off running for the double-door entrance of the physical sciences building like he had a rocket launcher strapped to his feet.

Roxas couldn't believe his eyes. His brother was sprinting across a campus he wasn't familiar with to a classroom he lacked the location of all to see a teacher he'd never ever exchanged a single sentence with. His family was full of nothing but crazies. Ugh.

"Demyx! Wait! You don't know where it is!" Roxas yelled after him, easily picking up momentum so his brother didn't get too far ahead of him.

Demyx just turned to look at him over his shoulder and stuck his tongue out. "Then hurry up, slowpoke!"

Roxas scowled as he reached the last few feet in front of the building, hopping off his board and leaning down to scoop it up in one smooth motion. Demyx was waiting for him as he held the door propped open. Neither of them said anything as they ran through the front entryway, ignoring the directory and bolting up the staircase on the other side of the floor. Demyx kept himself a little behind his brother, letting him lead them in the right direction. Up two flights of stairs, a right down the hall, and the third door on the left.

The younger blond zoomed through the open door with about three minutes left before ten, making a beeline for his group of friends sitting at the lab table by one of the windows.

Demyx glanced around the classroom, a little confusion on his features. "You guys have your study sessions in the lab rooms?"

"Yes, well," Roxas said, dropping his bag next to a stool on Olette's right. "The usual lecture classrooms don't have tables and things for group work."

"Or decent writing space, for that matter," Olette added, her chin propped in one hand as she tapped her pencil on the lab table. "Hello, Demyx."

Demyx had been in his last year of high school when Roxas and his friends had been freshmen, so they had met him several times. Cloud, however, had already been a college student and wasn't home all that often. Until the other day, Cloud had been considered more of an enigma and a name to his friends than an actual person.

Demyx smiled at her, pulling up a stool so he could sit next to his brother. "Hey, Olette. You been keeping an eye on Roxas here for me?"

She smiled brightly at him, straightening up in her seat. "Of course. Someone has to keep them all in line. Pence only has a fifty percent success rate."

Pence muttered some response on her other side, turning a page in his textbook.

"What was that, Pence?" Olette asked sweetly, turning to look at him.

Roxas quietly shifted his chair more towards Demyx while her back was turned. It was safer this way.

"I said…that's because…Hayner's such a handful?" Pence said hesitantly, his face plainly showing that that was _not _what he had said at all. Olette decided to ignore that fact and focus on his words.

"He _is _a handful," she complained, leaning past Roxas to see the door. "Where is he? I'm going to rip him a new one if he gets locked out of this session. Again."

Roxas started snickering, making both his friends and his older brother look at him. "How much you wanna bet he ran into Seifer on his way here?"

Pence snorted, dissolving into equally evil snickering, his eyes glancing at Roxas. "I'll bet on that."

"You can't bet on that," Roxas protested through his amusement. "_I'm _betting on that. You'd have to bet _against_ it."

Olette's face darkened, her gaze sharpening as she stared at Roxas. He immediately stopped laughing. "He better not have run into Seifer and picked another fight," she growled darkly, resuming her pencil tapping on the table with a ferocious glare that made the hairs on the back of Roxas's neck stand up.

"Seifer?" Demyx asked, looking from Roxas to Olette to Pence. "Seifer Almasy? He goes here too? I always wondered what happened to him when you said he went off to college. Isn't he two years ahead of you guys?"

Roxas sighed, leaning on the table and putting his head in his hands. "Yeah. We only have calculus with him. I don't know how Hayner managed to not notice him for three weeks, but—"

Voices outside the door cut him off, directing everyone's attention to the hallway simply because they all recognized the voice.

"You have about twelve seconds before I close this door, Mr. Malta," Zexion was saying calmly, and Roxas could imagine him looking at his watch as he spoke. "Nine…eight…seven…"

"You said twelve!" Hayner's indignant voice shouted back, his footsteps drawing closer and sounding like he was in an all-out sprint.

"Yes, well, it took me about three seconds to say that," the professor said flatly from outside as the door started moving. "Three…two…"

Hayner skidded into the classroom, stumbling a bit as Zexion pushed him forward so he could shut the door and lock it. Roxas grinned as his best friend bolted over to join them, squeezing between him and Olette.

"Sorry," Hayner panted, trying to catch his breath as he made himself comfortable at the lab table. "Got sidetracked. Hey Demyx. Is this Bring Your Brothers to School week and I just wasn't aware of it?"

"Yup," Demyx responded cheerfully. He was already busy watching Zexion make his way to the front of the room. "I'll forward the memo to you next time."

"Did you get in a fight with Seifer?" Olette asked Hayner as she checked him over with a critical eye. "If you—"

"No, no, not Seifer. Why do you always assume that?" Hayner replied irritably, yanking paper and his book out of his backpack. "Seifer doesn't get up til around…noon, on weekends. I ran into Sora."

"Ooooooh," they all said together.

"You actually started a conversation with him, didn't you?" Pence asked sympathetically, watching Hayner slump over the table.

"I was just trying to be nice," Hayner said with a slight whine to his voice, ignoring Olette as she shook her head and rolled her eyes. "I always feel bad when I have to cut a conversation short with him…"

A quiet clearing of a throat effectively silenced the classroom and any ongoing conversation in a way only experienced teachers with serious control issues could accomplish. Professor Zexion swept an unruffled gaze over the scattered gathering of students in the lab room, his eyes settling on various people. Including Demyx.

Roxas sighed as his stomach attempted a free fall to the floor. In slow motion, because the floor was only about a yard from where he was sitting.

The professor advanced calmly towards their table, his eyes analyzing the unknown 'student' while Roxas and his friends exchanged glances. Drawing to a stop beside them, Zexion tapped two fingers on the table beside Demyx's hand and raised an eyebrow. "I don't recognize you from any of my classes…"

"This is my older brother, Demyx, Professor," Roxas interjected before Demyx could speak up, starting to get used to the introductions.

"Is he a student here?" Zexion asked critically, his eyes briefly landing on Roxas. "These sessions are only for students that attend this school and are enrolled here in one of my chemistry classes."

"Ah," Roxas slowly, trying not to look too pleased with that news.

"Does he attend this school?"

"He's sitting right here and can hear you just fine," Demyx said, looking slightly miffed they were talking about him while he was sitting right there.

""Then I'd appreciate it if you could answer my question," the professor continued without missing a beat, his gaze narrowing at the blond man beside him.

"…no, I don't go here," Demyx said after a short pause as he raised his eyes to meet Zexion's.

"Then you need to leave," Zexion said flatly, turning away to head back to his table at the front of the room. "These are closed sessions; they're not open to the general public."

Hayner, Pence, and Olette gazed apprehensively at them, three pairs of eyes taking turns to evaluate their expressions. Roxas glanced at his brother to see how he was handling things, because Demyx tended not to do so well in the face obvious animosity. Sure enough, Demyx was chewing anxiously at his lower lip with a subdued expression on his face, his eyes dismayed and a little wounded, but Roxas wasn't completely fooled. Sensitive or not, Demyx was a Strife, and as a Strife he was nothing if not stubborn. It was the Way of the Strife. And the Strife thought process that was employed during bouts of stubborn determination often spawned miracles.

"Professor," Demyx spoke up with clear hesitancy in his voice. "I'm going to be transferring here next semester as a chemistry major, and…and Roxas offered to give me a heads up on what the classes were like."

Roxas stared blankly at his older brother before indignation flared inside him. He'd been blunt from the beginning that he did NOT want either Cloud or Demyx coming to his classes, and Demyx had the nerve to flip it all around and say it was his idea? Impromptu excuse or not, this was unacceptable. See if he shared his Little Sephy snackcakes with Demyx _now._ This called for an objection.

"Demyx, I thought you were maj—" Roxas started. He had every intent of finishing that comment on how Demyx was majoring in _music_, not chemistry, and would have, in fact, if a foot two sizes larger than his hadn't completely obliterated the toes of his right foot in a single swift attack that was completely hidden under the large old lab table. Roxas broke off his words to whimper in unabashed pain. Demyx pointedly didn't look in his direction. Objection overruled.

Zexion had stopped walking but hadn't moved to face them, choosing instead to merely cross his arms in silence. He said nothing for several long moments before half-turning to look at the older blond again. "Is this true?"

Demyx's shoulders lifted marginally as they tensed. "Yes sir."

The professor began to slowly retrace his steps back to their table. Roxas started kicking his brother's shoe with his other foot so it would get the hell off his toes.

"And what year are you in?"

"Starting my third year this year, Professor."

"What branch of chemistry are you planning on going into?"

Roxas would have laughed if he hadn't been in so much pain. There was no way Demyx would be able to answer a question like that. He doubted Demyx even knew there were multiple branches of chemistry, let alone the specifics entailed by whichever type Demyx decided to pull out of his arse.

Demyx sat up a little straighter, took a deep breath, and removed his foot from his brother's shoe. "Organic and environmental chemistry with an emphasis on chemical hydrology," he said with a straight face and a decent amount of enthusiasm.

Roxas rolled his eyes up from where he was trying to reset his phalanges so he could stare, properly flabbergasted, at the older blond. An interest in organic chem.? Chemical hydrology? Strife or not, the only explanation was that this was not his brother. That was most definitely a pod person. He was going to have to talk to Naminé about that again.

Hayner threw him a confused glance he could only shrug at in response.

"Hey," Hayner 'whispered' in a voice he considered soft-spoken. "I thought your brother was maj—"

Roxas swiftly kicked him in the shin to shut him up. Hayner squawked like a wounded seagull, which only made Olette prod him sharply with her pencil as she glared narrowly at him.

"I see," Professor Zexion responded in a voice that, had Roxas not known any better, could have possibly been described as 'thoughtful'. "And you're planning on transferring in the spring…?

"Yes sir."

Roxas put his head in his hands to help resist the urge to speak up again. This whole situation months, weeks, or even days down the road, could only end in tears.

"In that case," Zexion said, scrutinizing Demyx closely as though he could see through his eyes and into his soul—which he could probably do, Zexion was just one of those people—"you may stay. I will speak with you when we're finished here."

Demyx's smile was so bright it wouldn't have looked out of place in a toothpaste and mouthwash ad. "Thank you, Professor."

Zexion blinked twice (along with a few other students who were sitting within the bright smile flash range, watching), nodded, and transferred stern eyes to Roxas. "And next time, Mr. Strife, you need to clear this with me before inviting unknown persons to my classes, whether they are related to you or not. Do I make myself clear?"

"Yes, Professor," Roxas muttered into his hands, glancing up at the man standing by his table.

A dark eyebrow rose at his unsatisfactory response.

"Yes Professor, I'm sorry, it won't happen again. Promise." Roxas repeated, raising his head and his voice so he could be properly heard.

Zexion tilted his head in acknowledgement and headed back to his desk. "Alright, let's get started then."

Roxas shoved his brother roughly with his shoulder. "Demyx, _what are you doing_? Chemistry? Organic chemical hydrol-whatsit?"

"I spent all yesterday reading his papers," Demyx muttered back to him from the corner of his mouth. "And a dictionary and a glossary of chemical terms and I spent half the night with Xaldin on the phone, but, you know. Gotta make sacrifices for love, and all that."

"I bet you learned a lot of new words yesterday," Roxas told him sweetly, keeping an eye on the professor as he started speaking again.

"You have no idea," Demyx replied seriously, missing any and all sarcasm his younger brother had hoped to convey. "I feel smarter already. Now shhhh, I wanna hear what he's saying."

Roxas shook his head and returned his gaze to the front of the classroom.

"—with a wide range of topics we've already covered. Now because I had to fire my last TA…"

"Again…" the class muttered under its breath.

Zexion gave a long-suffering sigh (that was more an extended exhalation of irritated air than anything dramatic or emotional) before continuing. "…I'm going to have to run these sessions myself. I want you to divide yourself into groups based on whatever it is you're having problems with. Chemical formulae or name memorization, stoichiometry, conversions—"

A series of sharp raps on the door cut off the rest of his words mid-sentence. The class cringed collectively as Zexion's dark eyes slid over to the small glass window embedded in the door to stare at the unsuspecting victim on the other side. He walked slowly to the door, taking the most direct route possible, and waited with a blank stare and raised eyebrow.

The student's eyes took on a decidedly hopeful look (and they should have known better really, because when had Zexion ever been lenient with tardiness? Never, that's when) as blue eyes alighted on the professor's face.

Roxas traded uneasy glances with Hayner and even Olette just beyond him looked uncomfortable. He couldn't see Pence, but he was probably ignoring the whole thing as he was prone to doing in the face of awkward situations.

"You're late," Zexion said calmly, and there it was, that little glint of sadism—er, light, Roxas meant light—that clearly foretold whatever happened next, the man was going to enjoy it.

There was no way the student on the other side had actually heard the other man's words, yet his point had obviously gotten across. Roxas couldn't see much through the small window, but there appeared to be a lot of arm-waving and paper-flapping going on.

He could, however, see the slowly growing smirk of amused cruelty spreading across Zexion's face at his student's plight. The professor quietly stood there until the other student—it was probably a girl, Roxas didn't know any guys who would wave papers around like that except maybe Demyx—ran out of steam. Then he simply raised a hand and waved in that short, "you're dismissed" way that just comes to some people naturally.

The expression in blue eyes on the other side of the glass fell, adopting a pleading look. Zexion's eyes merely joined in on the evil amusement he felt at his student's expense. "Goodbye."

Roxas glanced at Demyx out of the corner of his eyes. His older sibling looked as though he was torn between speaking up and not wanting to interfere with the professor's authority. The younger blond put a hand on his brother's shoulder just in case, and was quietly grateful that Cloud wasn't here.

Zexion watched until the girl realized she wasn't going to get into the room and left, dejected. He turned on his heel and meandered back up towards his desk amid the silence of the classroom. He couldn't quite wipe the self-satisfied half-smile from his expression as he lazily lifted a hand to scrutinize his fingernails. Then within three milliseconds his gaze went from pleased to irritated and cold as his narrowed eyes swept over the forms of the stupefied people filling his teaching space. "Aren't you supposed to be in groups by now?" he asked sharply.

The scraping of stools filled the room as students hastily sectioned themselves off by topic and threw open their textbooks to various pages. Demyx trailed after Roxas and Hayner as they made a beeline for the stoichiometry corner (which had a significantly higher population than other portions of the room) shepherded by Olette and Pence.

Time seemed to pass with vindictive slowness as Roxas struggled to give a damn about how many moles of water were needed to make 30 grams of hydrogen peroxide. Hayner complained throughout the rest of the session, with the exception of the few occasions Zexion came over to assist them. Olette attempted to keep them all on task while using minor violence as a last resort. Pence did his best to help them understand the word problems they were working on with the patience of a saint. Demyx completely failed at keeping his mouth closed, constantly asking questions until he got the hang of the chemical conversions and then turned around and started helping others.

By the time the study session was over, Roxas couldn't look at anything without wondering about the ratio of elements in its chemical composition. His brain was exhausted, and demanding a vacation, medical compensation, and a retirement fund. Dealing with anyone who disagreed with him about _anything_ would not be an option for the next six hours unless someone wanted to lose some vital body parts.

"Do you need a ride home, Roxas?" Demyx asked as he collected some of Olette's chemistry notes. "Because Professor Zexion asked me to stay a moment after class—"

"I _know,_ I was _here_," Roxas butted in irritably.

"—so you'll have to wait a bit for a ride home."

"I'm just going to head back to the dorm and pass out," Roxas said dispiritedly, picking up his textbook and handing a pencil back to Pence. "Maybe I'll just poke fun at how girly Riku's hair looks today or how he eats Len and Garry's ice cream when he's feeling moody. So I'll feel better."

Demyx, however, wasn't particularly paying attention to him because his gaze was already re-focused on a certain someone at the front of the room. "Whatever floats your boat, Roxas!" Demyx said brightly, moving his stool back where it was supposed to be.

The younger blond vaguely waved a hand at him. "Yeah yeah, go on, call and tell me about what happens later or something like that."

His brother beamed at him and bounded off with a "Sure can do!" and more excitement than was strictly necessary, in Roxas's opinion.

"Hey Rox, do you want—"

"No," Roxas said shortly, his fingers messing with his carefully spiked hair in annoyance. "I'm going back to my dorm. And sleeping until today is over. Forever."

Hayner and Pence just gave him a weird look, but Olette's expression was decidedly more sympathetic. "Have a tough weekend, Roxas?"

"My family drives me _nuts_," Roxas said with a shake of his head. "I don't know how I've stayed sane for so long."

"Because of Naminé," Pence stated wisely.

"Probably," the blond agreed. "I'll see you guys tomorrow, okay?"

"Sure, Roxas. Feel better, man."

"See you tomorrow, Roxas."

"Don't forget your lab book tomorrow!"

Roxas nodded in acknowledgement to all of their comments and left, making it back to his dorm room in record time. To his disappointment, Riku was nowhere to be found. Instead, he collapsed onto his bed fully clothed, letting his backpack and skateboard fall to the floor with a thump and a clatter.

Classes started again on Monday, tomorrow, and Roxas couldn't have been any more unenthusiastic about that then he currently was. Homework would start up again (and now that he thought about it, he had both calculus and chemistry homework due tomorrow), there'd be more running around from class to class, and another chemistry quiz at the end of the week.

His one consolation was that things really couldn't get any worse than they already were (although from an objective standpoint, there really wasn't anything wrong with his life at the moment, but Roxas had never been one for being objective). But what Roxas didn't consider, was that if things couldn't get worse, they sure as hell could get more complicated, which most people considered synonymous with 'worse'.

And really, what kind of fiend would Life be if it didn't rise to the occasion to prove someone wrong?

xxxxxx

Author's Note: Okay. Monday starts in chapter 8. And from here on out I'll be following Demyx and Cloud as well. Because despite what's been alluded to in previous chapters, Roxas does not spend his time stalking people, let alone his brothers. Hit me up if you spot any mistakes in here, m'kay? REVIEW. Please.


	8. Chapter 8

Warnings: Still apply. Except Olette. You all deserve a warning for her, most definitely.

Author's Note: So, to be honest, I got hit in the face very, very hard with not so much Writer's Block as Plotter's Block. Which is just as bad if not worse than WB. But I've got it straightened out now, so that's good. Leave me a review and I promise I'll get the next chapter out way faster. It's Winter Break, after all. XD And you guys do know fav and alert are options on the Review window, right? (HINT HINT).

xxxxx

Chapter Eight

xxxxx

Roxas was awakened early the next morning not by the shrill ring of his alarm clock, as he normally was, but instead by the insistent singing of his phone. Rather than cut off the offensiveness by answering the thing, he burrowed stubbornly under his sheets and prepared to release his tentative grasp on consciousness.

THWACK.

"Answer your phone, you jackass," Riku's voice muttered sleepily from across the room.

The blond garbled something offensive under his breath as he shoved a hand out from under his covers and felt around for his phone somewhere on the nightstand. Naturally, it fell to the floor with a clatter at the merest touch of his hand. He cursed, tossed off the covers and one of Riku's pillows, and threw himself over the side of the bed to snatch up the phone and flip it open.

"_What_?"

"Oh my god, Roxaaaaaaaaaaas!"

Roxas groaned and rolled over onto his back, rubbing the back of his hand over his eyes. "Whaaat, Demyx?"

Riku muttered something and rolled over, pulling his sheets up over his head in defiance.

"Guess what, guess what Roxas!"

"Why are you calling me so early in the morning?" Roxas complained. He could practically hear his brother pouting over the phone.

"You said to call you so you'd know how it went yesterday!" Demyx whined, sounding like an offended five-year-old.

"Yeah, but I didn't _mean_ it," Roxas protested, closing his eyes and focusing on his breathing.

"Yes, you did."

"What time is it?"

There was a pause as Demyx searched for something that would let him know how disgustingly early it was. "Seven o'clock."

"Holy Jenova, Demyx," Roxas griped, attempting to stare a hole through the ceiling.

Riku cursed softly and rolled out of bed, grabbing a towel, his bathroom supplies, and stomped out the door towards the group bathroom.

"I know, I'm sorry, but Roxas, guesswhatguesswhatguesswhat?"

"_What?_" Roxas growled, sitting up irritably in acknowledgement that he really wasn't going to be heading back to La-La land anytime soon.

"Zexy's going to help me transfer to your school!"

"Please, _please,_ don't call him that," Roxas pleaded, already resigning himself to the fact that he wasn't going to be able to see his chemistry professor in the same way ever again. "And wait, what?"

"I'M TRANSFERRING," Demyx repeated loudly.

The younger blond gave up on his struggle with his sheets to stare at his phone because it was obviously lying to him, _again._ "I—you're—what?" he sputtered.

"I _SAID_—_"_

"I heard what you said," Roxas snapped, smashing his sheets down to the end of his bed with his feet. "I mean, _what_? Do you even have the math and science credits you need to transfer?"

Demyx was pouting again. "…maybe."

"What happened to you majoring in music?"

"…I don't know."

"And, and," Roxas stumbled off the mattress, banged his hip into his desk, and cursed fluently for a moment as he took the required three steps to his closet. "Have you mentioned any of this to Mum and Dad?"

"…no."

"Demyx, do you have any idea what you're doing?" he asked in exasperation, yanking the first pieces of fabric he could get his hands on out of his closet.

His brother huffed in a way that somehow conveyed how much of a killjoy he thought Roxas was being. "Roxas, why can't you just be happy for me?"

Roxas managed to mangle several unsuspecting words before he achieved anything even remotely resembling coherency. "I—happy? Demyx, you haven't put any thought into this at all!"

"I have too!" Demyx retorted. "It'll be easy!"

Roxas rolled his eyes and almost tripped over his skateboard. "But, Demyx, really, what happened to music? Music is your _life._ Chemistry is _certain death._"

The sound of exhaled air rushed loudly through the earpiece. "I just…I don't know, Roxas. What am I gonna do with a major in music?"

Roxas frowned. "I thought you wanted to teach?"

"Well…I think…I don't know."

"Now is not the time to start listening to Dad, Demyx."

"I'm not doing this for Dad."

"I know. But Demyx, you tried the chemistry route when you were a freshman, cuz that's what you're friends were doing—Xaldin, Marluxia, Rikku, Larxene…remember?"

"Rikku's majoring in biology."

"That's not the point. Demyx, you were _miserable_ your first year. You hated it. Don't you remember?"

Silence settled over the line as he let Demyx remember that year. Roxas used the time to try to find his shampoo. He was unsuccessful.

"Yeah, you know…" Demyx began quietly, "I'd really hate to go back to that."

"Demyx, you _don't_ have to go 'back to that'." Roxas clambered back onto his bed and started pulling out drawers built into the base of the bed. Clothes, books…

"Then how do I get close to Zexy?"

Roxas crinkled his nose at the offensive nickname. "I dunno, Demyx. But lying about your major and your transcripts isn't the way to do it."

Demyx grumbled something under his breath that didn't carry over to Roxas. "Fine. Then what do I say to him?"

Normally, this was where Roxas would say something along the lines of 'Well you dug your own grave, now lay in it', but Demyx was a bit too sensitive for that. Naminé would kill him. So he pulled out his backup response. "You know, you should probably talk to Ne about that. She'd know."

His older brother snorted. "Well _duh_; I should've known that. I mean, why am I talking to you anyway?"

"At seven in the morning."

"Yeah, sorry about that. Well I gotta go now Roxy, thanks, bye!"

Roxas stared at the now-dead sounding phone in his hand and settled for just shaking his head. Then he tossed it on his blanket and started sorting through the mess on the floor around his desk. "Where the hell is my shampoo?"

A thump on the wood above him jerked his head up in automatic reflex.

"Thanks," said Riku, sparing him a brief glance before walking to his side of the room (about two feet away) and toweling off his hair. Roxas watched in disbelief as it fluttered smoothly into place with an obscene amount of grace despite its still-damp state. Baywatch style.

"You used my shampoo?" Roxas asked accusingly, eying the bottle as though it now contained those poisonous cooties Cloud used to tell him about. But those were from girls. He guessed Riku was close enough to qualify as one.

"You woke me up two hours before my next class," Riku replied evenly, pulling a perfectly-fitting shirt over his head. His hair remained distinctly unruffled. He grabbed his keys and headed back to the door (another foot and a half). "Later, Strife."

Roxas sullenly watched his roommate leave and glared angrily at his shampoo.

The only thing that could save his day now, was a bagel. So naturally, the cafeteria was all out of bagels.

Roxas dropped into a chair beside his best friend and laid his head on the table.

"You know, I just spilled some orange juice there," Hayner said casually, giving the blond a weird look. "What's up with you?"

Roxas straightened and gave Hayner the evil eye, reaching up to feel—sure enough—dampness on his forehead. "Why didn't you clean it up if you know you spilled crap?"

Hayner shrugged, talking around a piece of toast. "I did, but the napkins here barely survive their removal from the container."

Roxas sighed and scrubbed at his forehead with his sleeve. "Where are Olette and Pence?"

"Pence is almost here and Olette's running late. She's in a _great_ mood, too."

"Fantastic," Roxas said sarcastically, snatching one of Hayner's pathetic napkins and shredding it. "Just how I like to start my Mondays."

Neither of them said anything more until Pence showed up, hissing a warning at Hayner not to say _anything_ to her about her visiting monthly friend.

Hayner looked thoroughly repulsed and disgusted. "Visiting monthly _nemesis_, more like."

"_What's _a visiting monthly nemesis?" a testy, under the menstrual influence sounding voice asked from behind them.

Wariness dropped over the table in the face of a potentially dangerous time bomb.

"Seifer," Roxas said promptly, looking meaningfully at Hayner.

"Although he's more of a daily menace than a monthly one," Hayner continued, looking uncomfortable because Olette was breathing down his neck.

"Even though you haven't noticed him in calc for the last three weeks," Pence added dryly.

Olette glared at them all suspiciously. "Seifer is a person, not a thing."

"He is too a thing, Olette," Hayner said, scowling. "Some people are better described as _things—_"

"_Anyway,_ you guys should eat something. Class starts in like twenty minutes," Roxas interrupted; why would he want to spend his morning listening to Hayner rant about his arch-nemesis when could be doing more fun things, like pulling out his own nails with pliers, or scrubbing his face with undiluted sulfuric acid?

Hayner frowned and shoved him with his shoulder, oblivious to his friend's rather negative thoughts. "You haven't eaten anything either. Absorbing OJ with your forehead doesn't count."

Olette and Pence glanced inquisitively at him. Roxas just shook his head in a 'don't ask' way.

"Just go grab a bagel or something," Hayner insisted.

"They're out of bagels," Roxas muttered sulkily as though Canada had decided to deny the rest of the world maple syrup.

Hayner rolled his eyes. "Then go get something full of carbs that will make you fat, Roxas."

Roxas gave him a dirty look and stalked off to grab something to-go, trailed by Olette and Pence.

Minutes later, they were on their way to Professor Leonhart's classroom, half-listening to Olette display her PMS-ing state to the world.

"And then she hands me back my shirt—_my_ shirt—with a stain on it. _Cranberry_ juice. Did I say she could borrow that shirt? No. Did she even attempt to clean it? No."

"That _bitch_," Roxas said distractedly, focused on tracking a piece of thread from somewhere in his sleeve.

"I _know,_" Olette exclaimed, eyes flashing as Pence opened the classroom door. "So then I told her, I was totally pissed, 'who do you think you are, going around stealing my stuff? I didn't say you could borrow that, and what the hell is this?' because that stain was _so_ not on there the last time I saw it."

"Uh huh," Hayner muttered in that way men do when they just don't want to be chewed out for being inattentive. They settled down in their seats and Roxas wished Olette would just _shut up._

"And then she tried to tell me I gave it to her two weeks ago. Yeah, o-kay. I would have remembered that. I don't even _like_ loaning out my clothes. So I chewed her out for about twenty minutes and then left to meet you guys." She dumped her stuff on her table with a little more force than necessary.

"What do you mean you 'chewed her out'?" Pence asked hesitantly, and Roxas actually started to pay attention. If Pence was worried, then he should be biting his fingernails.

"I _mean,_" Olette responded, a hint of cattiness entering her voice. "I raged at her and wouldn't let her get a word in edgewise, and then left when she burst into tears, that's _what_."

"Over a shirt?" Hayner asked incredulously, horror in his voice.

The brunette girl turned on him with a nasty self-satisfied look. "_That'll_ teach Kairi to borrow my stuff again without asking."

Roxas and Hayner glanced at each other with wide eyes. Olette terrified them both regularly twelve times a year. As far as he knew, Naminé had never been this volatile.

"Well…which shirt was it?" Pence questioned cautiously.

"That's not the point, Pence," Olette replied irritably.

Hayner pointed a dramatically accusing finger at her. "You didn't even like that shirt, did you?"

Roxas swatted at Hayner's arm in alarm, but the professor's voice cut across the room.

"Alright, let's get started," Leon announced from his desk, and the noise level in the room abruptly fell to a low murmur.

"Olette," Pence insisted, trying to lean towards the brunette girl without appearing too conspicuous. "Seriously, it wasn't that pink shirt you bought back before school started, was it? Because you did let her borrow that."

"_No I didn't,"_ Olette snarled, slamming down her textbook.

With Hayner shaking his head furiously beside him, Roxas felt the strong need to chime in, even in the face of the very real possibility that Olette wouldn't hesitate to gut him with her nails and eat his entrails. "Yes you did," he said stubbornly, eyes flitting over to Pence and back to the narrow-eyed girl next to him. "Kairi called in the middle of lunch last Monday and pestered you about it, remember?"

The boys watched with tense anticipation as Olette visibly paused and mulled over the conversation she'd had with her roommate.

"I mean…" Pence scanned her face, frozen with thought, and visibly debated whether or not to go on. His brain answered yes. "She may not have cleaned it, but at least she didn't just take your stuff, right?"

Olette's mouth opened and shut slightly several times, her eyes gradually widening as a hand rose to cover it. "Oh my Jenova," she breathed, her gazing darting to all three of them. Roxas felt his stomach plummet to the ground at the sight of green eyes beginning to water, and he looked quickly at his best friend in panic. "She did ask. She did, and I just…I can't believe I did that—"

Hayner coughed. "I can."

Roxas elbowed him viciously and hoped Olette hadn't heard him, but she didn't seem to be paying any more attention to them.

To the alarm of all three boys, Olette burst into tears and proceeded to shove all her supplies back into her bag. "I have to go find Kairi and apologize! I'm so sorry, I can't believe I forgot about that!" She hugged each of them in turn, sniffling and generally making a mess of her face, and grabbed her bag. "I love you guys, don't hold anything I say against me, and I'll see you at lunch!" She ran out the door.

The boys all looked at each other, bewildered, unanswered questions in their eyes. They turned back to the class to realize everyone, including the professor, was staring at them.

Roxas's face flushed pink at the disapproving scrutiny of his peers. The dark glares of the other girls in the class and other students shaking their heads at them made it clear they thought the three of them were responsible for Olette's outburst. He sunk down low in his seat as Hayner did the same.

Leon had an eyebrow raised. "Something you'd like to share?"

All three of them had a brief eye conference and elected Roxas, against his fervent eye protests, as their spoken representative. Roxas glared at them both.

"Some things are better left unshared, Professor," he forced out finally.

Leon merely nodded and turned back to the board. "As I was saying, pass the homework up now; you should all be familiar with how this goes. And if I get another stack of papers from less than half of you, I'm tripling the point value of your next homework assignment."

Roxas let his head thunk onto his desk. He hadn't done his homework last night, had he? At least he had until the end of the day. And then…crap, chemistry. Looks like he'd be doing homework for lunch again.

The class groaned collectively over the sound of shuffling papers, the students in the front trying to furtively count the sheets before Leon got ahold of them. Everyone sat with bated breath as the professor took his time counting each assignment, glanced over various answers, and tossed the stack on his desk.

"The rest of you have until 4pm to turn in your work," Leon told them flatly, his tone distinctly unimpressed with the lack of effort put into their learning. "By 4:01pm my office will be closed, locked, and dark."

Hayner made a face and mimicked the words under his breath as Pence rolled his eyes at him. Roxas muttered curses and yanked his chemistry textbook out of his bag along with some paper, planning on spending the rest of the class doing his chemistry homework.

He endured the tangible disapproval from Pence on his right. He ignored Hayner's quiet fury on his left, caused by Seifer flicking little balls of paper at the back of his head. Unfortunately, the end of class came far too soon, and Roxas still wasn't done with Professor Zexion's assigned problems.

"Next assignment due on Wednesday," Leon announced over the cacophony of students having decided they were done with calculus for the day. Or if you were Seifer and Hayner, the crash of furniture that went flying when the younger boy couldn't stand it anymore and lunged across the room in an effort to strangle the taller blond.

"Dammit," Roxas scowled in frustration, completely disregarding the scuffling and banging going on behind him. "Pence, did you do the chemistry homework?"

The dark-haired boy gave him a questioning glance. "Yeah, why?"

"Can I see it?"

"…why?"

"Because, uh…because…I need help understanding what all these questions actually mean, you know, not just the answers, and you're brilliant enough to make my unimpressive brain understand?" Roxas tried, hoping flattery worked on everyone.

"Sure, Roxas." Cheers! "But why don't I just help you with what you don't understand?" Booooo.

"Will we have enough time for that?" the blond asked doubtfully, sticking the papers he'd been working on back in his textbook and secretly hoping Pence would just give him the answers the way awesome friends do.

"Yeah, of course," Pence said nonchalantly, standing and shouldering his bag, glancing up as Hayner stumbled into the back of his chair. Casually, he pushed Hayner back toward Seifer. Hayner grunted in thanks. "We'll just work on it in history."

"Great! Thanks, Pence," Roxas said gratefully, feeling a little stress lift off his chest. "You're amazing."

"I know," Pence shrugged.

"Roxas!" Leon called from the front of the room, irritated. "Tell your pet and his friend to stop destroying the room."

Roxas turned to look behind him as his friend was caught in a headlock. "Hayner, sit."

Hayner just scowled at him as his face started turning red from lack of air, his hands scratching at the other man's arms.

"Say it, Chickenwuss," Seifer smirked, watching the top of his victim's head as Hayner continued making angry red lines along his forearms. "I want to hear it."

The other boy just grit his teeth and dug in his nails, his expression turning mulish in the face of his own helplessness and frustration. Roxas and Pence raised simultaneous eyebrows in amusement like the good friends they were.

Seifer leaned down to whisper something in Hayner's ear, his eyes alight with malicious enjoyment. Hayner erupted in a raucous coughing fit that made everyone within twenty feet of them frown in concern. Roxas decided his friend needed to be rescued like the hot-headed damsel he was before he blew a blood vessel. Or ten.

"Come on, Seifer, let him go," Roxas said forcefully, dragging Hayner's bag over and dropping it at their feet. He grabbed the front of his best friend's shirt. "He's only allowed to fail one course this semester, and that's calculus. So he can't be late to his next class."

"Thanks, Rox," Hayner wheezed, trying to roll his eyes and deciding it took too much effort.

"You gonna say it?" Seifer demanded of the boy in his grip, raising a fist and rubbing his knuckles against the top of his head, _hard_.

Unsuccessfully attempting to jerk his head away, he kicked his foot back to collide sharply with Seifer's shin.

The blond snarled, shoving him away with enough excessive force to knock Roxas over as he crashed into him. Or he would have fallen over if there hadn't been a painfully pointy desk at his back. "I'll get you later, Chickenwuss," Seifer sneered, glaring at the three boys as he scooped his textbook off the desk. He pointed a demanding finger at Hayner. "Think about what I said." He swept out the door, three pairs of eyes on his back.

Roxas raised an eyebrow at his best friend. "What was that about, man?"

"Nothing," Hayner muttered, taking his bag from Roxas and glowering at the floor. "Seifer's just an asshole. Come on, let's go."

The three boys filed out of the classroom, the other two watching Hayner watch Seifer disappear from view. Roxas frowned, getting the distinct and uncomfortable feeling he was missing something. He glanced at Pence, but the dark-haired boy just shifted his gaze back to Hayner and didn't say anything.

"Well," Roxas said awkwardly, not entirely sure what this strange mood was, but certain it was somehow Hayner's fault. "I guess we'll catch up with you later then?"

Hayner's eyes darted up to look at him, yet didn't quite meet his gaze. "Yeah, I'll catch up with you guys for chemistry. Maybe Olette won't be so psycho by then."

"Don't get your hopes up," Pence muttered.

"Alright, later." Hayner took off across the campus, practically running as though he was going to be late for class. He probably was, but still.

The remaining blond scowled and turned on Pence. "Did I just miss something important here?"

Pence glanced up at him, looking unconcerned and deciding not to answer.

"Peeeeence," he wheedled annoyingly.

"I don't know why you ask me these things," Pence complained as Roxas followed him to their history class. "You know only Olette understands weird things like that."

"Weird like what?"

"You know, creepy moods that make you think you've missed something obvious, 'reading between the lines', _feelings_," Pence shuddered at the idea of being able to comprehend, let alone vocalize the range of horrible things Olette did. "It's a girl thing, Roxas."

"But we're not girls, and we felt that," the blond frowned at this new information.

"Yeah, we feel it sometimes and stuff. We just take great pains not to _understand it._ The male brain isn't meant to get that kind of stuff, Roxas." Pence shrugged as they wandered across a stretch of grass towards their target building, passing a small group of girls sitting in a circle giggling over something.

"Oh my god, did you see him—"

"I totally had his class this morning—"

"He's so hawt!"

"I know! I'd take chemistry forever—"

"And have you seen all the reporters trying to get into the building?"

"It's ridiculous! But can you blame them?"

"Hell no, I have pics on my phone!"

"Omg, let me see! Share!"

"Nooooooo!"

The girls' conversation dissolved into shrieks, Roxas watching in disbelief as three girls attacked their friend for her camera phone. Pence grabbed him determinedly by the sleeve and pulled him away.

"See what I mean? Girls are _weird_, Roxas."

"Duly noted."

When they arrived at the history classroom and settled into the stadium seating, Roxas simply decided that Pence was right—all girls were weird and possessed chronic hormonal issues that baffled modern science.

Satisfied with that conclusion, Roxas turned to his friend. "So, uh, Pence. Chemistry homework. Help?"

Pence pulled his backpack into his lap so he could sort through it. "What do you need help with?"

Roxas stared at the paper on his desk and decided 'everything' wasn't going to make Pence very happy. "Uh…just the chemistry stuff?"

Pence sighed, half-twisting in his seat to give Roxas a well-deserved frown. "Are you looking at your notes or textbook at all outside of class?"

Roxas tried to avoid his friend's eyes and not look shifty at the same time. "…yes?"

His friend muttered something under his breath about Hayner and bad influences. "Okay, look, Roxas. I'll go over these with you, but you need to start doing some studying on your own or I won't help you."

The blond started whining in his head, and couldn't quite keep his expression from curling in disgust.

"Roxas—"

"Fine, fine," Roxas conceded in grudging defeat, because dammit, he really needed the help. "So how do I do this?"

By the time the class ended with Professor Merlin's long, rambling speech about fairy tales (the man didn't seem to note any distinction between them and textbook history), Roxas felt as though he'd actually gained a few skill points in the chemistry area. Which was fantastic, really, because if IQ was judged by the ability to do chemistry, he'd probably be around -75 or so.

"Chemistry next," Pence announced, waiting for Roxas to pick up his work. "At least Professor Zexion will let you in the classroom now."

"Yaaaaaaaaaaay…" Roxas muttered with a severe lack of any enthusiasm at all.

Pence looked amused at his expense. "Let's go see if Olette's evened out yet. She's usually okay by lunchtime."

Roxas scowled, his mood darkening both at his impending chemistry class and the prospect of seeing his temperamental friend again. "Olette doesn't 'even out'. She's like an 8.6 on the HRS," he informed Pence flatly.

Pence looked confused, plainly wondering what the hell Roxas was talking about. "HRS? I've heard Hayner say that before, but—"

"He came up with it," Roxas explained, swinging his bag onto his shoulder. "It stands for Hormonal Ritcher Scale."

Pence snorted and immediately tried to cut it off, resulting in a series of unnecessary coughs.

And despite how Roxas would have preferred to suffer through Olette's vengeful wrath (after informing her that he and Hayner had created the HRS in her honor) rather than go to Chemistry, it just wasn't in his horoscope. Damn planets.

When life didn't like you, it really _didn't like you._

xxxxxx

Author's Note: You know, I really thought Axel was going to show up in this chapter…apparently not. But I know for sure he'll be in the next one. And you know what will make the next chapter magically appear? Yes, children, that's right! REVIEWS. True story, right there. I don't know if I've said this enough. REVIEEEEEEEEEEW. How else am I suppose to know what you guys are thinking? And trust me, I'd like to know. I mean, if you ask me straight up, I'll deny it til my very last breath, but some of your reviews do influence the plotline. _SHHHHHHHHHHH, that's a secret though!_ Don't tell anyone, that's just between us, okay? Okay. So drop me a line, would you?


	9. Chapter 9

Warnings: Still apply. Except Olette. You all deserve a warning for her, most definitely. Oh, and Seifer. And certain redheads, but I digress.

Author's Note: I apologize for the delay, but biology kicked my ass this last semester and I had to put ALL my writing on hold to make sure I passed the class. So, this chapter is longer in a small effort to somewhat make up for it. I don't know if any of you noticed a pattern with my postings, but I'm more reliable about this over Winter and Summer session. So expect more eventually. And please, PLEASE don't be afraid to message me and verbally beat on me to update. It really does help, and I thank those of you who weren't afraid to do so. As you can see, this is the result. You may all feel proud of yourselves now. :D

For those of you in the US…Happy Independence Day! I was hoping to post this before the end of the day and I still have ten minutes! Ha! Now go on and read, you know you want to.

xxxxx

Chapter Nine

xxxxx

Zexion was one of those professors that made you willing to bribe, kidnap, or murder someone if it meant you could avoid taking his class.

He was just one of those guys, you know the type. Good-looking, quietly confident, ridiculously smart, driven—in a way that made you want to stab a fork into his eye socket and pull out his brain so you could figure out what was _wrong_ with the man. There wasn't any one thing you could put your finger on about him, either…sure, he had his arrogant moments (but the man had, like, four or something, so that wasn't unexpected), and he could be a bit of a sadist at times (then again he was a teacher; that's part of the job requirement), but neither of those things really explained why, if you spent more than five minutes in a room alone with the man, a sane, rational person developed the irrational urge to either curl up in a corner and start bawling like a colicky newborn or change their major to Professional Serial Killing.

Or maybe only Roxas felt that way. He didn't know how Demyx could stand him, let alone like him.

Roxas could say for certain, however, that he was one of those teachers who stood at the door to collect homework the second a student crossed the threshold, and Jenova help you if you were the poor, poor sucker who didn't do your homework last night.

"Oh, is that right?" Zexion asked some poor fool who'd neglected to bring his work to class with insincere understanding.

"Yeah, see, my grandmother was sick yesterday, and we had to take her to the hospital so I stayed with her last night—"

"So you couldn't do your homework?"

"Well, no, because, uh, the waiting room was being repainted, and, uh—"

The professor's eyes narrowed. Roxas cringed. If there was anything he'd learned from being in his class, it was that the man ardently hated liars. Which didn't bode well for Demyx, really, but that was another story for another time.

"Your homework is your pass into the classroom; you should know that by now. If you don't have it you need to leave."

"But—!"

"Next!"

The line of students looked on in pity as the boy waffled uncertainly for a moment before turning and wandering away, a pitiful, lost look in his expression. The professor turned dark eyes on Pence, who instinctively shoved his papers at Zexion as though warding off evil. Roxas did the same and they both slunk into the classroom, making a beeline straight for Olette's solitary form.

She glanced up at the sound of their approach. "Oh, hey, guys."

"Feeling better?" Pence asked, dropping into the seat on her left. "Did you find Kairi?"

Olette sighed, pulling half-heartedly at one of her ponytails. "Well, I…I tracked her down in her English class and apologized—"

"You followed her into her classroom?" Roxas hissed, staring at her incredulously. "Seriously?"

The brunette girl flushed and ducked her head. "I…I might have made a bit of a scene…" she said in a small voice.

"You probably mortified Kairi for life," Pence told her, looking amused. "And then what?"

"I left. And went back to the cafeteria. And drank coffee until this class started."

Pence started laughing.

Roxas bit his lip so he wouldn't do the same. "You drank coffee. For three hours."

Olette lifted her chin defiantly, her cheeks still faintly pink. "Yes."

"Do you feel any better?" Pence asked.

"Not really," Olette sighed. "I really just want to go back to bed and start the day over, but I don't think life will wait for me."

"Too true," Roxas agreed, yanking his notebook out of his bag. "Oh hey, Demyx called me this morning."

"About what?" asked Olette, glancing at Roxas curiously.

"He thinks he wants to transfer—"

"Alright, let's get started," Zexion interrupted sharply, somehow appearing in the front of the classroom without any of them noticing. "We have a lot to cover before your quiz on Friday."

Roxas groaned and slumped over his desk.

Zexion ignored the sounds of disappointed agony from over half his students. "But, before we begin, I have some news for all of you…I'm sure some of you were familiar with Dr. Vexen?"

His students exchanged looks and hummed in agreement.

"Dr. Vexen, due to some personal reasons—"

Several boys in the corner started snickering. Zexion glared at them. They shut up.

"—has been given leave to take his sabbatical. Luckily, we were able to find a teacher to take over his position."

A dark-haired girl in front looked like she was about to start hyperventilating. "Is it true? There've been all these rumors going around saying, oh my god, is it really him?"

Roxas frowned. "Is it who?"

Girls all over the classroom gasped and stared at Roxas with something bordering dangerously close to antipathy. The blond slid down in his seat, eyes wide in alarm. If they couldn't see him, they couldn't hurt him.

Professor Zexion was rubbing the bridge of his nose irritably. "Yes, it's true. I'm sure most of you will see him before the week, if not the day, is over."

Noise erupted all over the room, consisting mainly of intrigued conversation and squeals of varying decibels. Rarely had Roxas ever felt this confused in his life.

"What the hell are they talking about?" Roxas asked Olette, trying to stay low to avoid the wrath of his female peers. "Who's taking over for Professor Vexen?"

Olette's brow furrowed as she thought, tapping her pencil on her desk. "Well, I'd heard people say something about the new professor used to be a supermodel…I didn't think it was true, but if Professor Zexion says it is…"

Pence raised an eyebrow at her. "Our new professor's a former supermodel?"

"You're kidding," Roxas said disgustedly. "There was nobody better qualified?"

Olette shrugged and gave him an apologetic look. "I don't know, Roxas. I guess not."

"That's ridiculous," the blond continued, crossing his arms and slouching back in his seat. "There's no way he'll know what he's talking about. Modeling doesn't have anything to do with chemistry. I doubt he even graduated high school."

"Roxas!" Olette scolded him, reaching over and whacking him on the arm with a folder. "Don't assume things like that! It takes more than a high school diploma to get a job as a college professor!"

"Yeah, yeah," Roxas grumbled, rolling his eyes. "Whatever."

"We'll see, I guess," Pence said neutrally, glancing past Olette to look at Roxas. "Don't judge a book by its cover, and all that."

"Even if it's a really hot cover," Olette sighed, playing with her hair.

Roxas and Pence gave their friend slightly disturbed looks.

"…Yeah. Don't say that ever again," Roxas requested, wrinkling his nose and looking up as Professor Zexion ventured toward the back room. "That's mind scarring."

"Sorry."

Zexion cleared his throat and the classroom abruptly went quiet in anticipation. "Axel, come here and say hi to the nice students."

A deeper voice then Roxas had expected answered back almost immediately. "Sod off, Brainiac, I'm busy!"

The classroom once again erupted in shrieks and screams for autographs despite the less than cordial response, and Zexion seemed doubly pleased at the emotional turmoil he was causing. "Alright, everyone settle down, you'll get to see him soon enough."

Roxas took a look around the room, fascinated at how many girls seemed to carry fashion magazines around with them in their purses. Not just one or two, but _stacks_ of them. Selphie appeared to have her own personal scrapbook, but he wasn't quite close enough to see who it featured…

"_Anyone still talking when I'm finished speaking will automatically fail their next test,_" Zexion snarled, his eyes flashing.

The class went silent in less than a second.

"Good. Now, moving on from stoichiometry, we have word problems, which I'm sure you all are pleased to hear…"

It was the worst class of Roxas's life to date, and he made sure to tell Hayner all about it as soon as lunch rolled around.

"Chemistry _sucked_!" Roxas announced eloquently, banging his stuff on the table next to Hayner and making the taller blond jump in surprise.

Hayner scowled at him. "Yeah, well, I failed another essay in English. Just don't tell Olette, okay?"

"_Hayner!_" Olette screeched from behind Pence.

The boy in question rolled his eyes to the ceiling. "Dude, why didn't you tell me she was behind you?"

Roxas shrugged and slid into his seat. "We all come from the same class; I thought you knew by now."

Hayner muttered some choice resentful words under his breath as Olette began another tirade on his lack of work ethic and motivation.

Ignoring the verbal reaming going on to his left, Roxas sighed deeply and pulled out his calculus book. "So, Pence…what was the calc homework last night, again?"

"Page seventy-three, numbers five, seven, nine, and eleven," Pence responded, not breaking his gaze around the cafeteria.

"…Seriously?" the blond asked, hardly daring to believe his ears. He might actually be able to eat for a change, instead of systematically stealing Hayner's food—

"_No_," Pence snorted, giving Roxas a 'dude, come on now' look. "Numbers five through twenty-seven odd, thirty two, thirty-three, and thirty-five."

Roxas cursed a blue streak under his breath as he flipped to page seventy-three.

"It's only fifteen questions, Roxas," Pence said sympathetically.

"Roxas, you didn't do the homework?" Olette asked with a frown, finally finished tearing Hayner a new one.

"Not now, Olette," Roxas cut in impatiently, scribbling as fast as possible without accidently resorting to hieroglyphs. "You can chew me out when I'm done."

Olette huffed disapprovingly and settled herself next to Pence. "You two really need to work on the whole homework concept," she sniffed.

"Whatever," Hayner and Roxas muttered simultaneously.

"So, I heard this new professor guy's pretty good," Hayner said conversationally, leaning back on his chair and eyeing the nearest food counter. "Really knows his stuff."

"He's a former supermodel," Roxas interrupted flatly, boxing his answer for question eleven.

Hayner frowned at him. "What's that got to do with his teaching?"

Roxas put question thirteen on hold to stare at him. "He used to be a _model_, Hayner."

"And?" Hayner asked impatiently.

"You know…" Roxas began, incredulous that his point wasn't completely obvious. This required some involved and pointless gesticulating, apparently. "A _model._ They get paid to stand around and look pretty and wear ridiculous clothes no one else can wear. Zero brainpower necessary."

"You've really got a thing against models, don't you?" Pence mused, eyeing Roxas thoughtfully.

Roxas sputtered, glancing at each of them in turn. "That's not the point!" he protested loudly. "He's a model! _Mod-el._ How else can I say this? I mean, it's not like you can even get a modeling degree, or something! If I'm paying to take this class, I want to make sure he can at least teach, you know? Models aren't exactly known for their intelligence."

"That's an awful stereotype, Roxas," Olette said, frowning.

"Yeah, well, most stereotypes are based in truth somewhere down the line," Roxas muttered, scribbling out something illegible for number seventeen.

"That doesn't mean you should perpetuate them!"

"Forget it," Roxas said, slamming his pencil to the table and standing abruptly. He could feel his agitation settling over him in waves. "I want pizza. You coming, Hayner?"

The taller boy shrugged and eased out of his seat, shoving his hands in his pockets. "Sure. Let's go. We'll be back in a sec, guys."

Pence just nodded, looking from Roxas to Olette and back again.

"Roxas, I didn't mean—" the brunette girl started, looking worried and playing with her fingers. "I just meant—"

"Let it go, Olette," Hayner said wisely for a change, setting a hand on his best friend's shoulder as they moved away. "Just don't let anyone jack our stuff, okay?"

Roxas snorted. "Like you've got anything worth stealing, Hayner."

His friend socked him in the arm. "This is true."

"Then why did you hit me?"

"It felt appropriate."

"Jerk."

"Shorty."

"Hey, Chickenwuss!"

Hayner went rigid as a board next to him.

Roxas rolled his eyes. "Hayner, don't—" Too late.

"What?" Hayner snarled, whirling to face the only human being on the face of the planet that could set him off in two seconds flat. It was probably some inherent, finely tuned instinct by now, or something.

The shorter blond heaved a praying-for-patience sigh and turned to watch the latest disaster waiting to happen. And stared, not unlike how Hayner was currently staring, with his friend's ire rapidly transforming into puzzlement. The two friends exchanged a quick look, and Roxas raised an eyebrow.

"What the hell are you wearing, Seifer?" Hayner asked, sounding chronically distracted, no doubt by his _inability_ to see the usual amount of skin the other man tended to display.

Seifer just sneered at him, one hand brushing down the front of his jacket. "It's a suit, 'wuss, what's it look like?"

Hayner's repertoire of witty comebacks apparently didn't have anything on hand for occasions dealing with a well-dressed arch-nemesis. "But…I…..…you're blond…?"

Roxas glanced from Hayner's face, slack with surprise and confusion (_does not compute_), to Seifer's annoyed visage ("Duh. What's with the stupid expression on your face?") and decided he _really_ needed some pizza to go along with Hayner's trauma. Preferrably now. Backing slowly to the food counter behind him, he prodded two slices onto a plate, shoved his ID card at the cashier, and started munching as though he were riveted to the season finale of _Days of our Existances._

Roxas's best friend clearly objected to the adjective 'stupid' being directed at his person. "Wha—_you_ look stupid! Why're you wearing a suit to class anyway, moron?"

"Internship," a voice spoke up from behind Seifer, and Roxas blinked at the realization that Seifer's two cronies were hovering ten or so feet behind him. Fuu just watched Hayner jump in surprise at the sound of her voice.

"Seifer works downtown, y'know?" Rai added, crossing his arms and simply watching the other teen.

The pizza-munching blond eyed Seifer critically. He certainly _looked_ as though he belonged in an office building downtown, and if the other man hadn't been acting as assholish as he usually did, Roxas most definitely would have suspected pod people. Again. But it wasn't just the shock of someone you thought you knew in an entirely different wardrobe—the man looked _good_ in a suit. Charcoal grey jacket and trousers, just dark enough to set off his hair without washing out his complexion, a dress shirt that matched his eyes, and an unknotted tie slung over his shoulders. Not bad, Roxas thought, grudgingly impressed. Now if only he would get a personality transplant to go with that outfit.

"Downtown?" Hayner sputtered incredulously. "Who'd hire you _downtown_?"

Seifer scowled at him. "I work in a law office, Chickenwuss; quit asking stupid questions. Now've you got an answer for me or what?"

"Shove off, Seifer," Hayner snapped, his hands not-so-subtly clenching into fists. "Quit harassing me about that, alright? It's not any of your business!"

Roxas's forehead crinkled as he squinted at both of them.

"The hell it's not, dumbass," the taller blond spat back, taking a threatening step forward. "Just give me something to tell her, it's not that fucking hard. Even a freak like you should be able to do that."

Hayner's hackles rose noticeably. "I'll call her later, you prick. Now get off my back and stay out of my business before I freaking break your face!"

His arch-nemesis lifted a hand, and Roxas figured it wasn't so much the beginning of a wave goodbye as a prelude to impending pain, eyes narrowing, when Fuu placed a firm palm on her friend's shoulder.

"Time," she said quietly, her flat gaze locked on Hayner's face despite the way she directed her words at the other male.

Seifer automatically rotated his wrist to check his watch at the comment, then glared at Hayner with a derisive snort. "Whatever, Chickenwuss. Like you could break anything, let alone my face. I'll see you in Com tomorrow."

"Dammit…" Hayner muttered as Seifer gave him one last nasty, searing look before turning on his heel and striding away, trailed by both his friends. He glared after them, the stubborn tic in his jaw letting Roxas know just how irritated the other boy was.

"So…" Roxas said slowly.

"Shut up," Hayner gritted out. "I don't want to talk about it."

"You know, repression isn't the healthiest way of coping with—"

"Shut _up_, Roxas."

"Well _fine_," Roxas huffed indignantly, turning back towards their lunch table. "But I'm not sharing my pizza with you then."

"Hey guys," Olette greeted them, finishing the last of…whatever she'd been eating. "We—"

"I thought you were watching our stuff!" Hayner scowled, giving the trash in her hand a dirty look.

"Yes, well, you and Roxas took forever so Pence and I took turns getting food," Olette told him flatly, picking up her bag. "Now come on, get your stuff. We have to head over to lab."

Roxas grabbed a fistful of napkins and shoved his books in a barely carry-able pile, trying to avoid smearing any pizza grease on his papers. "Awweddy?" he asked with his mouth full of bread, sauce, and cheese.

"Yes, already," Olette replied, giving him a warning glance. "Chew your food, Roxas."

Roxas swallowed. "Yes'm."

"But I haven't gotten anything to eat yet!" Hayner whined like a child denied cake on his birthday. "Roxas—"

"_No,_" Roxas snarled, hunching over the remains of his pizza. "I already told you—"

"Come on, you steal my food all the time!"

"No! It's not my fault you chose a fight with Seifer over food!"

"I didn't _choose_ it, it just happened!"

"That's what she said," Roxas replied darkly, stuffing five inches of pizza crust in his mouth.

Pence snorted in laughter as he stood up, swinging his backpack over his shoulder while Olette just rolled her eyes.

Hayner and Roxas squabbled over the pizza all the way to the gothic-looking physical sciences building, eventually ending in a wildly ridiculous chase where Hayner nearly tripped himself up on the stairs and Roxas almost choked on the last of his food.

"Why do you two always act like four-year-olds?" Olette asked grumpily, reluctantly pounding Roxas on the back until his coughing sounded more like hacking and less like gagging.

"He started it," Roxas insisted hoarsely, stabbing a finger at his best friend.

"I'm sure your maturity level just went up five notches," Pence said, shaking his head and moving on. "Looks like there's a crowd outside our room, you guys."

"Great," Hayner muttered, ignoring Roxas's pained-sounding wheezes from beside him. "It's probably reporters and crazed fangirls who don't even have to take chemistry."

"Probably," Pence agreed.

The group approached the crowd clustered around the door with appropriate wariness, and Roxas noticed it was entirely comprised of pleading, whining, squealing females. He felt Hayner's steps slow beside him due to the same instinctual trepidation, and the two boys pressed together at the shoulder in a show of male solidarity.

"Sorry ladies, sorry, if your name's not on the list, you don't get in. That's the rule!" A voice carried easily over the clamor, and Roxas realized with a jolt that one of the people he'd assumed was a women…obviously wasn't. A pair of ice blue eyes slid over to their hesitating group and a bright eyebrow raised in question. "You four got your ID cards, yo?"

There was a brief scramble and mad search for the elusive, rectangular pieces of plastic ("Crap, did I bring mine today?" "You better have it; you're supposed to have it on you all the time!" "It's fine, Olette, it's probably in the ID slot in his bag." "I hate when I clean this stupid thing out…"), and then a brief struggle to reach the security at the door.

"Hand 'em over," the redheaded man said easily, snatching all four cards in one swipe and squinting at the first. "Okay, ready Rude?"

Roxas's eyes darted to the second man at the other side of the door, the one who actually looked more like a bodyguard than simple security personnel: shaved head, wearing a dark suit, and tinted glasses.

The man lifted his clipboard and glanced at his partner. "Ready."

"Okay, let's see…Ol-it Ab-uh-ga-el Jen-keens?" the redhead security man enunciated slowly, glancing up from the card. "Ol-it?"

"It's 'Olette'," Olette corrected faintly, as though she couldn't believe someone could butcher her name that badly.

"Ol-it on there, Rude?" the other man asked, ignoring Olette's horrorstruck face.

"Olette Jenkins," Rude confirmed, marking something on his sheet. "Go on in. And give her back her card, Reno."

"I know, I know, I'm not a complete ditz, Rude, jeeze yo," Reno complained, shoving the plastic back at the brunette. "Here."

The two men shifted for a moment to let her squeeze through before reforming their barricade.

"Alriiiight, next we have…" Reno screwed up his face for maximum effect as he stared at the next name. "Pince Jock-ub Mat-heeeews?" he drawled.

Pence figured it was a lost cause and didn't say anything.

Rude rolled his eyes. "Pence Matthews."

Pence followed Olette into the classroom.

Reno cleared his throat. "Le's see…Rocks-ass Joss-F St-riff…" he paused and looked up to pin Roxas with a curious gaze. "Hey, are you Spikey's brother?"

"Who?" Roxas asked, baffled. What was wrong with this man anyway?

"Spikey," the redhead repeated as though that was supposed to jog his memory. Roxas only continued to stare at him blankly, so he turned and jabbed his partner with his elbow. Rude winced. "Hey, Rude what was his name? You know, Blondie. Whaz-his-face's best friend?"

Rude lowered his glasses so he could stare at Roxas over the lenses. "You're Cloud's brother?"

"Cloud!" Reno exclaimed, throwing his hands in the air and nearly slamming Rude in the face. "That's it! I knew it was some weird-ass girly name…"

"Yeah, I'm Cloud's brother," Roxas scowled, glaring at Reno. "What about it?"

"Nothin', yo, we just went to school together," the redhead said, grinning. "Tell him we say 'hi', would you?"

"Whatever," Roxas muttered, grabbing his card back and pushing past them.

"Look at that scowl, yo!" Reno cackled, sounding way more delighted than was probably good for him. "Definitely a Strife! And now you…Hi-ner A-dum Mm-Al-tah?"

Hayner stomped in after him and threw himself into a chair, fuming. "What the hell is that freak's problem?"

"He's probably bored," Olette said, shrugging. "That's not exactly an interesting job to do all day, I guess."

"Still," Hayner huffed, tilting his chair onto the two back legs. "What a freak."

Olette eyed Hayner's chair with a calculating gaze. Roxas discreetly scooted his seat far enough back so he wouldn't be in the way if Olette's foot decided it needed to introduce itself to Hayner's seat.

The lab room was already full of whispering students, and again, the appearance of those magazines that everyone with double 'X' chromosomes seemed to be carrying around. Girls who had never so much as given each other a second glance or even held eye contact before now sat in giggling clumps like they'd been best friends since before they were born, discussing hairstyles and clothes and makeup and other things Roxas just didn't see the importance of.

"I still don't understand what the big deal is," Roxas grumbled, glaring eye daggers at the girls in front of them.

Olette sighed at him, chin propped in her hand, and said, "Roxas. Girls like pretty things. Boys like shiny things. That's just how it is."

"Oh." Roxas frowned. "Why didn't you just explain it like that before?"

She sighed at him again in a long-suffering and completely unnecessary fashion, in his opinion.

All conversation in the room abruptly died as the clock hands settled exactly on the 12:50 mark, gazes swinging expectantly to the door leading to the storage rooms, where there was the faint sound of approaching footsteps. Everyone in the classroom seemed to collectively hold their breath, just waiting, waiting, waiting, until Roxas felt sure he was going to suffocate from a buildup of anticipation he wasn't even feeling.

_Red_.

Vibrant green eyes stared out over the class beneath the brightest red hair Roxas had ever seen in his life, gaze calm, curious, and smugly amused. "Well," the man said, crossing his arms and leaning casually against the whiteboard at the front of the room. "You're the quietest class I've had so far," and then Roxas abruptly went deaf.

It took several moments for Roxas's brain to sort through all the sound; to realize that a bomb had not, in fact, gone off, but that all of that madness was comprised of individual voices screaming together _in harmony._ He slapped his hands reflexively over his ears, turning to his friends only to find the same look of confused abject terror reflected in their faces, excluding Olette, because she appeared to be caught up in the hysteria. Shaking with adrenaline so graciously delivered by his scare, his eyes darted back to the cause of all this ridiculous behavior.

Quite honestly, it would have taken an impressive amount of ignorance (read: asexuality) and perhaps an extended affliction of blindness to not peg the man as a supermodel on sight. _No one's_ hair spiked like that without a certain amount of practice, talent, and high-quality hair product. _No one_ could have bone structure like that and _not_ go into a career where it wasn't flaunted. Green eyes, the color so strong they could have been lasers, and was that…oh Jenova's sons, that was guyliner. Not dark guyliner either, but a bright red hue that perfectly matched his hair. Even more distracting than that were the black symmetrical tattoos under those eyes, whose sole purpose, it seemed, were to direct an observer's gaze upward to, well…the green and the guyliner.

And dammit, Roxas hated to admit it (he could comfortably and fervently blame this observation on Demyx), but Zexion's hips had nothing on Axel's. The man was tall and skinny almost to a fault, his waist tapering to corset-like proportions before flaring out into hips that had probably been transplanted from some poor unsuspecting woman with a genetic penchant for spawning obscene amounts of progeny. His wardrobe, obviously built to emphasize his questionably masculine figure, was relatively simple: black shoes, matching tailored pants that just made his legs appear even longer, an unremarkable white dress shirt with the top two buttons undone, and a cropped black jacket that ended at the bottom of his ribcage.

Their new professor hadn't even flinched at the abrupt change from silence to pandemonium, undoubtedly accustomed to hearing crowds much larger than a mere grouping of college-aged teenagers screaming at him.

Roxas scowled at the self-satisfied smirk creeping unabashedly across that face and wanted nothing more than to take an acid-dipped mace to it.

The redhead pushed away from the wall and raised his hands in a wordless request for silence that, to Roxas's extreme surprise, was instantly granted. "Thank you, I—"

"I LOVE YOU, AXEL!" Someone screamed from behind Hayner. Three more voices felt the need to confirm that sentiment, and another five added their two cents in, and then a few more unidentified people began shouting questions no one could hear, and that damned smirk kept growing in ways that could unbalance _anyone's_ ego, and then—

"_SHUT UP SO I CAN HEAR HIM SPEAK," _Olette shrieked, glaring at everyone in the room who had dared to use their voice box, and Roxas, Hayner, and Pence felt a shiver of fear as they remembered their female friend was a bit off-center at the moment and would remain so for the rest of the week.

The whole class collectively paused as if terrified of inciting more of Olette's wrath, because women on their monthly hormone trips are quite easy to spot and should be appeased at all costs.

Axel cleared his throat after several long seconds and the room's attention swung back to focus on him. "As I was saying before, thank you for the…warm welcome." He grinned, and girls the class over snatched tissues out of their purses in response to a sudden influx of nosebleeds.

Roxas rolled his eyes.

"But before things get a little out of control," Axel continued, heading over to his desk and brushing aside a small collection of papers. He lifted himself onto the furniture and settled smoothly into a cross-legged position, gaze skimming over the class. "I have a couple of announcements you may find surprising. First of all, this is a class, not a semester long autograph session." Sharp green eyes flashed across the room, seamlessly shifting from amused to cold in less than a second. "Do not ask me for my signature, or for photos, and I expect at _least_ the same amount of dedication in this class as you apply to Professor Zexion's class."

The students assembled before him stared in various combinations of horror and disbelief.

Then Axel smiled. "Starting tomorrow," he added easily, admirably ignoring how several girls fainted in their seats.

Cheers rang throughout the room as an alarming number of kids pulled out paper and pens and fumbled with their phones.

The redhead looked amused again at the commotion and Roxas turned to give Hayner a 'can you believe this guy?' look.

"Seriously?" he asking, staring at Hayner as though disgusted with the male population in general. "For serious?"

Hayner sighed and shrugged, stretching his arms over his head. "It's going to be a long semester, Roxas," he said simply.

Roxas scowled and propped his chin in his palm, tapping his other hand irritably on the tabletop.

"Alright, alright, hold on," Axel said loudly from the front of the room, waving a hand at the class. "Just a couple more things to say. I'm sure everyone here knows me as Axel—"

"Who?" Roxas muttered out the side of his mouth to Hayner. Hayner snickered. Olette gave the two of them a filthy look that nearly made both of them choke on air.

"—and I realize that may be the _only_ name you've heard affiliated with me." Axel lifted an eyebrow in challenge. "Does anyone know my last name?"

A sort of stupefied silence filled the room as students exchanged curious glances, wondering and making sure everyone knew absolutely nothing before turning back to the waiting redhead.

Axel didn't look the least bit surprised. "That's what I thought. So let me enlighten you."

Roxas scrubbed vigorously at his temples with the heels of his hands, trying to manufacture the patience to counteract so much conceit. And the man didn't even seem to be doing it on _purpose._ Pence gave him a weird look.

"My name is Axel Andrews," the man informed them casually with the air of one who knows he's captured the enraptured attention of an audience. "And in this room, and on this campus, you will address me as Professor Andrews."

The class blinked at him.

"Your former professor…he didn't have an aide, did he?" Axel asked, frowning, and the anxiety levels of women everywhere rose thirty-eight percent.

"No," Hayner said flatly when it became clear that the class was too vomit-inducingly enamored to respond. "He was convinced they'd try to steal his research, or whatever."

"Huh. Interesting. I just assumed they'd given me…anyway, I should introduce you to my teacher's aide, then." He turned slightly towards the stock room. "Kadaj!"

A silver-haired young man materialized in the doorway instantly, dressed entirely in black—slacks, dress shirt, and shoes. For a brief moment, Roxas considered the man was related to his roommate, but Riku had yet to mention any family other than his parents. Teal eyes remained locked on the redhead who'd requested his presence, despite the intensely focused attention of dozens of students.

"Yes?" The aide asked, eyes glittering with something Roxas didn't like. But that could just be his Riku-prejudice kicking in.

Axel simply watched Kadaj for a short moment before curving his lips in a slow, easy, _beautiful_, smile that turned the logic centers in the brains of everyone present into mush for exactly fifteen seconds. "I just wanted to introduce you to the class."

Kadaj hardly spared a glance for the starstruck group on his left, much more interested in staring at Axel. "…okay."

Axel's eyes were bright with humor as he waved his aide away. "Alright, thank you…"

Kadaj looked as though he was doing the same thing Roxas was—frantically trying to kickstart his neurons into functioning properly. For the moment though, he just turned with a swivel of his hips and disappeared back into the stockroom.

Roxas frowned for a second as various mental processes started coming back online. Where were all these men with hips who _clearly_ took after their mothers coming from? And why hadn't he noticed them before?

A sidelong glance at Hayner showed the other boy looked a little bit more than faintly disturbed. Pence was still rubbing his eyes with his fists and looked in no hurry to stop. Olette looked frighteningly dreamy, but even with her eyes unfocused there was still a glint there that Roxas would really rather not know about.

"Did anyone else find that incredibly threatening to their heterosexuality?" Hayner muttered, burying his face in his arms on the table.

"What?" Roxas asked, determinedly _not_ looking at their new professor.

"Nothing." Hayner cleared his throat in an entirely awkward way. "At least now we know how he got the position."

"Seriously," Roxas groaned.

"Mmmhmmmm," Olette agreed.

"Olette, _don't. Say. Anything,_" the two boys demanded simultaneously.

Olette just hummed happily under her breath and started doodling.

"Now that you've met Kadaj, for those of you also in my lecture class, he will be running the Supplemental Instruction classes," Axel said mildly, looking over the devastating aftermath of having knowingly used his looks for the fun of it. "I'll have a new syllabus for you next week, but I won't be changing much. Be ready to work and I'll give you the benefit of the doubt that you all understand proper lab attire." He clapped his hand and rubbed his palms together, eyes bright. "Any other—"

The shattering sound of breaking glass interrupted the rest of his words. It wasn't the single crash of someone accidentally dropping a tray of beakers either, but more like glass being repeatedly flung with a fury and with a purpose. Bodies jumped and eyes widened in synchrony as though the event had been choreographed.

Drawing a deep breath, Axel sighed as he hopped down from his perch on his desk and made a beeline for the stock room. "Excuse me for just a second, I'll be right back."

The moment Axel set foot over the threshold the noise abruptly stopped, leaving an eerie silence hanging over the room.

"What the hell?" Hayner asked disgruntledly, looking annoyed and rubbing at his stomach. "I'm so freaking hungry and this is just weird. Can we leave now?"

"No," Olette said airily, not even raising her eyes from her latest cluster of sketches. "Class isn't over yet."

Roxas gave her a flat look. "You just want to sit here and stare at him some more," he said irritably.

"Don't you?" Olette murmured, vacantly smiling at her papers.

Hayner and Roxas threw her a thoroughly disgusted look. "_No_," they said pointedly, as though they couldn't believe she expected them to say anything else.

Axel's reappearance cut off anything Olette had in mind to respond with as he traipsed to the front of the room and slipped his hands into his pockets. "Sorry," he said after a pause. "Kadaj gets a bit emotional sometimes…" He flicked his gaze around the classroom. "I think that's it for today though. I'll see you all next week."

Roxas's classmates erupted in happy chattering as they swarmed the professor with a hoard of blank surfaces and writing utensils, leaving the blond's row mercifully free of anyone except his friends.

"I think the only acceptable reaction to this is to sleep it off," Hayner said bluntly, rising slowly from his seat and keeping a wary eye out for any Axel fans.

"Agreed," Roxas nodded wholeheartedly, rubbing his eyes and hoping the entire experience could be slept off like a bad hangover.

"You have calculus to finish," Pence piped up from Olette's other side, ever the happy provider of reality bitch-slaps.

"Really?" Roxas asked, staring at his dark-haired friend. "You had to bring that up now? Before I even have the chance to flee the classroom?"

"You know you'd forget, Roxas," Olette butted in, surprising them all with her sudden coherency. She stuffed a couple papers into her bag and looked at the three of them. "What?"

The expression on Hayner's face told volumes about how much he doubted Olette's clarity of mind at the moment. "Are you done ogling our professor?" he asked distrustfully. "Because it seemed like you were pretty seriously infected with the Axel virus."

Roxas snickered.

"Oh _please,_" she snorted, shaking her head in response to their obvious foolishness. "I was not _ogling_ him, Hayner."

"You weren't?" Pence questioned, frowning at her.

"That's what it looks like when you're _not_ ogling someone?" Roxas demanded incredulously, nightmarish thoughts of Olette _actually_ ogling someone crowding his mind. "That's a lie."

"A horrible, ugly, denial-filled bold-faced _lie,_" Hayner added, leaning forward and leering at her gleefully as he spoke. "Sensible Olette has a celebrity crush! And she's got it _baaaaaad!_"

Olette flushed and hugged the rest of her papers to her chest, eyes glancing nervously to the crowd by the whiteboard like she was worried they might overhear. "Shut up, Hayner," she muttered, trying to inch around the taller boy, but he wasn't giving her any room to do so.

"Awwww, it's okay 'lette, it's perfectly normal!" Hayner cooed in delight, not noticing the set to her jaw that told Roxas to move aside, and quickly. "See, when a girl loves an unattainable male sex icon very much…"

Roxas wasn't the least bit surprised when, seconds later as he made his escape to work on his math homework, Hayner found himself with a face full of chemistry textbook and a bloody nose.

xxxxxx

Author's Note: Sorry Hayner, but you asked for it. And now you've all met Axel. I was starting to get some complaints about that, but since Axel is just now coming in…expect this to be a very long story. Very long. Next chapter starts with Cloud's pov.

And just a question…how many of you are interested in Seiner? Because I'm debating on throwing it in, but it'll be up to you all. Let me know.


	10. Chapter 10

Warnings: Still apply. Um…not too much here.

Author's Note: Happy Halloween, all! Glad to be finally posting this, as I take horribly long with these sorts of things (and I've been sucked into the awe-inspiring fandom of Sherlock). First chapter with different viewpoints! Hope you all enjoy it.

And uh…how fond are you guys of Cleon? Because…I can guarantee it's not going to end the way you'll prolly want it to. Sorry in advance. And Seiner has been officially added to the story!

xxxxx

Chapter Ten

xxxxx

Cloud Strife would like it to be made perfectly clear, for the official record, that he is not a stalker. While there have been suspicious circumstances in the past that may appear to support such a theory, he insists that the goings-ons at those times were rather unfortunately and unfairly misconstrued.

Which is why when a voice from his doorway curiously asked "what are you doing?" he jumped about a foot and a half and hit the kill button on his computer monitor.

"What?" Cloud asked, still staring at his now black screen.

"What were you doing?" Naminé asked again, and he could feel her gaze crawling over his back.

"Nothing," Cloud replied, clearing his throat slightly.

"Were you watching porn again?" his sister asked with mock suspicion, although her tone was only half-teasing.

Cloud whipped around to glare at her. "No," he snapped indignantly, his face miraculously free of unnecessary color.

Naminé just watched him calmly. "Oh, don't give me that," she said, voice turning matter-of-fact. "I know you used to watch it with the sound off so Mum and Dad wouldn't hear."

Cloud leaned on his computer desk, slid his hands over his face, and rubbed his eyes. He didn't want to know how she knew that. The answer would probably involve more embarrassment than he could handle.

She was the older sister—according to the Strife hierarchy, no one had secrets from their older siblings. Demyx wheedled information out of Roxas, Cloud knew everything about both Demyx and Roxas, and Naminé was an enigma that had blackmail on all three of them. The only person more powerful than her was their mother.

"_No,_" he repeated darkly.

"So then…?" she prompted.

"It's classified," Cloud said, crossing his arms.

She stared at him. "Cloud, you work for the postal service."

He raised an eyebrow at her as thought to say '…and?' As if he didn't already know that; of course he did. He looked damn good in the uniform, too.

"The postal service doesn't have classified information!" she protested, frowning at him.

"That's what you think."

He internally cringed as her eyes went soft and sad as they flickered to his screen.

"Were you looking up Mr. Leonhart again?"

"_Dr._ Leonhart," Cloud muttered, his jaw clicking shut as soon as the words were out.

"Oh Cloud." Naminé invited herself in and closed the door before settling herself down on his bed. "He's really thrown you for a loop, hasn't he?"

"_I don't get it,"_ Cloud exploded, reaching forward and jabbing the monitor on again. "This doesn't make any sense, Ne. I don't _like_ men."

"Mmhmmmm," said Naminé.

"I dated girls all through high school, and I wasn't compensating for something, or in denial, I just never looked at boys that way. Never."

"Uh huh," his sister agreed neutrally, making it clear that she was here to listen, not to judge.

Cloud shifted in his chair to look at her face. "So why now? I mean, I'm not suddenly gay, am I? Wouldn't I have noticed this back in high school, or college, or something?"

"Cloud—"

"And why him?" he pointed accusingly at the screen without looking.

Naminé glanced at the snapshot of the brunet man on someone's website, caught in the process of teaching.

"Cloud," she started carefully, catching his eyes and intertwining her fingers in her lap. She had to do this in a delicate, cautious manner or he would shut down in Does Not Compute mode the way nearly all men did when trying to decipher their feelings. "You do know that despite what society presents, most people aren't solely heterosexual or solely homosexual, don't you? Haven't you ever heard of the Kinsey Scale?"

"…what?" asked Cloud, frowning back at her.

"Sexual orientation is more along the lines of a scale, with heterosexuality and homosexuality falling at opposite ends. And most people fall somewhere in between. There's more to it than just gender."

There was a pause for a few moments.

"This is getting kind of deep here, Ne," Cloud said finally with a slight clearing of his throat, fingers tapping uncomfortably on the armrests of his computer chair. "I don't think I should continue this conversation with you."

"Shut up and pay attention to what I'm saying," Naminé said, not unkindly, but still not willing to deal with wishy-washy squeamishness.

"You know," her brother said, avoiding her eyes and opting to look back at his desk. "I really think this is something I should be talking about with Mum. She's probably been waiting ages to have this talk with one of us, and I wouldn't want to rob her of that one bright point in her life."

"Now Cloud," Naminé began, hands folded in her lap. "It's nothing to be ashamed of. When two people love each other very much—"

"_Muuuuum?_" Cloud called plaintively and turned to the door, sounding like a lost child locked in a room with a bad, bad man, and nothing at all like his twenty-three years.

"She's not here right now, you know." Naminé bit her lip for a second so she wouldn't laugh at him. "Cloud, attraction is attraction and there isn't much you can do about that. Sometimes gender makes a difference and sometimes it doesn't, but most of the time you're not really in control of that. And I doubt your brain has been keeping this a secret just so it can shout, "Surprise! You're gay now!" when you're least expecting it. It doesn't work that way."

"How does it work, then?" Cloud asked grumpily.

"Cloud," Naminé began wisely, bringing her clasped hands up so she could set her chin on them. "The reason why poets, musicians, and authors are still talking about it is because _no one knows._"

Her brother snorted. "This doesn't even make sense, Ne. I've only seen him twice, talked to him once, and he doesn't even like me."

"As I said—"

"Do you know what he said to me?" Cloud demanded, crossing his arms as his expression turned thunderous and borderline-incensed, eyes narrowing.

"Well, no, I—"

"He said," Cloud continued, completely steamrolling anything his sister was about to say, "that he already had his hands full dealing with juvenile, almost-adults six days a week. That he didn't need another one, another _lovesick_ one, Ne, following him around while he was trying to do his _job_."

"Cloud," Naminé said quietly, and he could see the humor melting from her face.

"I am _not_ a 'juvenile, almost-adult', Ne," Cloud spat, just _this_ close to trembling with anger. "And I'm not _lovesick_. I don't _follow him around_. Where does he get off making assumptions like that? It's not like that, it's not like that at all! I just—"

His sister didn't say anything as he struggled for the right words, trying to find a way to properly give voice to the ideas in his head.

"I don't know, okay?" he growled after several unsatisfactory seconds. "I don't know, but whatever it is, it's not that. I'm not lovesick, I'm not in _love— _that's just ridiculous. He doesn't know what he's talking about, and he's _rude_."

Naminé coughed discreetly. After all, Cloud could be pretty rude when he wanted to be. And when he didn't mean to be. It was sort of the pot calling the kettle black, to be honest.

"Cloud," she started gently, "do you think that—"

"Who _says_ that to someone they don't know?" Cloud barreled on, glaring at her as though she were the subject of his grievances. "He doesn't know me! I'm not some scrawny, newly-graduated teen he has to put up with in his classes, so why should I put up with him?"

"Umm," Naminé started hesitantly.

Cloud ignored her. "I don't know what Roxas told him, the little brat, probably blathered something about how I like tall, dark, and handsome, which is awfully cliché and _not true,_ but he's clearly got the wrong idea now. Roxas doesn't have any idea what he's talking about either—he's never even been on a date, that Olit girl or whoever doesn't count, so how could he? Roxas has the worst way with words—"

"Errr, well," Naminé added unhelpfully. "That seems to be a common male thing, in this family."

"—and did you know Roxas apparently tried to explain the whole 'pretty teacher equals not paying attention in class' theory, and _he_ initially thought Roxas was trying to say he had a crush on _him_. On Leonheart! Did you know that?"

"Uhh, no," Naminé admitted, watching Cloud's increasingly agitated face with interest. He made the most _intriguing_ faces when he vented. "No I didn't, actually."

"As though _anyone_ could fathom liking that insufferable ass," Cloud muttered under his breath, spinning back to face his computer and furiously closing every internet window he had open with _very_ forceful clicks. "_Rude._ Implied Roxas needed a _babysitter_! _No one_ is allowed to say that to my littlest brother! _I_ have full jackassery rights regarding Roxas, not him! How dare he! And you know what?"

"Now Cloud—"

"If I _wanted_ to be a lovesick juvenile almost-adult, which I _don't_, but if I _wanted_ to, who's he to tell me I can't? Huh? I can be as lovesick as I want, I can be as juvenile as I want, I can _follow him around,_ if I want! And who's he to tell me 'no'?"

Naminé frowned. "I think that's called stalking, Cloud," she said. "There're laws against that, I'm pretty sure."

"Stalking, smalking," her brother snapped, powering down his computer and slamming a fist on his desk. "He pisses me off. He was probably intolerable in school, and now he's a _teacher_? What have these kids done to deserve that? Nothing, no one deserves that, Ne, no one. He makes me so, so—"

His sister leaned back on his bed and wordlessly watched Cloud's brain try to push steam out his ears in rage.

"—so _angry_," Cloud finished in a rather anticlimactic way. "You know what else? This is all his fault. It's all his fault, it has to be, so goddamn him and any spawn he manages to create. This is not my—this is _his_ problem, and he better fix it! In fact, I'm going to go tell him so right now! What's he gonna do to stop me?"

"You know they have campus security, right?" Naminé pointed out calmly.

Cloud said some rather uncomplimentary and offensive things about campus security. "Yeah well, if that _#*%&-ing $$_ calls _#*%&_-ing security on me he's going to _#*%&_-ing wish his _%+#& ^#%%$_ had decided to become a hermit," Cloud snarled, throwing himself out of his chair and snatching up his keys off the desk. "That _#*%&_-ing _$*(%_."

Naminé sat up, bemused. "Cloud, did you just censor yourself by pronouncing _keyboard symbols_? It's not as though I can't figure out that you're cussing up a storm, you know."

"Shut up," Cloud snapped, stalking across the room and slamming open his bedroom door. "Some things aren't meant to be heard by a lady's ears."

"Awww, that's sweet, Cloud! Unnecessary, but sweet."

"I'm going to go have a talk with Dr. Asswipe about his unappreciated jackassery," Cloud responded, narrowing his eyes at her. "Hold down the fort until I get back." He turned and went to pull the door shut, but turned back. "Oh, and if you see Roxas, hit him." The door closed with a bang that made the walls tremble for several seconds.

Naminé just sat contemplatively on her brother's bed, tracing patterns on the worn comforter with no real intent. This was not the way this conversation was supposed to go at all.

"Oh bollocks," she sighed.

~x~

Hayner had a fiery, burning hatred for public transportation.

He squeezed his way off the bus and onto the sidewalk, relieved at the increased space and freedom of movement the street now afforded him. Scrunching up his face, he threw his arms above his head and stretched, grabbing both his own wrists and pushing towards the sky. With a sigh, he dropped them again, feeling his shoulders complain a little less at the aches they'd accumulated on his cramped bus ride home.

It really sucked, having a driver's license and no car. Life could be such a cruel, cruel, dominatrix.

Mistress? Ha. Life was nobody's mistress.

He swung his mostly empty backpack over his shoulder again and headed down the street in the direction of the supermarket. From there, he had about a three minute walk to his house. Overall, he wasn't that far from campus; just a twenty minute bus ride and then a couple minutes of walking. As long as he timed everything right, it usually wasn't a problem—unless the summer sun tried to fry him like an egg, or winter rains attempted to drown him, or a blizzard decided to move in…

Oh no wait, this completely sucked.

Hayner sighed and cut through the grocery store parking lot, keeping an eye out for moving vehicles and runaway shopping carts. He'd had occasional run-ins with both in the past, and well…repeating those experiences wasn't on his to-do list. The last time he'd spaced out and been hit by a—

"Hayner? Is that you, Hayner?"

The boy in question froze for a moment, creating a couple seconds of awkward silence before his brain kicked in and activated its voice-recognition software. He spun on his heel, turning to look at the woman hovering by the door of a blue pickup truck.

Hayner blinked. "Mrs. Almasy?"

The blond woman took a few steps toward him and smiled, her eyes brightening. "I told you, Hayner, just call me Quistis. I haven't had the chance to talk to you in a while."

Hayner shuffled his feet and stuck his hands in his pockets, letting his eyes drift over every other car in the parking lot instead of looking at her face. "Um, yeah. I've just been busy with school, and all."

"Oh I know, I know," she chuckled, waving his answer away. "I understand; I remember when Seifer first started. He couldn't wait to get out on his own."

"Yeah," Hayner agreed dully, because he really cared about what Seifer went through when he left home. Not.

"So, I was talking to your mother earlier today…" Quistis started, keeping her voice calm and eyes kind as she moved into the subject she really wanted to discuss.

The brunet cringed, feeling a little stab of irritation in his chest. What was with everyone wanting an answer _right now_? Was a little time to think things over so much to ask for? Was the world going to end if he didn't make a decision in the next thirty seconds? Somehow, he didn't think so.

"Oh yeah?" he asked casually, glancing at the shopping cart she'd left by her truck.

"Yes," Quistis replied serenely, hands clasped loosely in front of her. "And I can understand your hesitation—I know you and Seifer don't see eye to eye—"

Hayner couldn't stop himself from snorting at the unbelievable understatement in those words.

The same ice-blue eyes Seifer had inherited narrowed at him. Hayner quickly wiped his face of any expression.

"—so your hesitation to accept our offer is well within your rights," the blonde woman continued. "I certainly wouldn't want to intensify any antagonism between the two of you. My husband and I, however, would be happy to have you."

"Um, yeah," said Hayner, finally looking up at her and thinking of how he could say this as politely as possible. "I don't really think it would be a—"

Seifer's mother lifted her glasses farther up the bridge of her nose with one hand and roughly readjusted the sneakily sliding strap of her purse with the other, causing the contents of her bag to jerk and shift noisily.

Hayner's eyes darted to the bag at the sound, his gaze catching on a narrow, braided strip of black protruding past the zipper that made his heart stop. The rounded end curled around the section he could see, flexible and not unlike a dangerously coiled snake hiding in the woman's purse.

How had he forgotten that Seifer's mother was a well-versed professional in the art of handling whips? Not that Hayner really thought Quistis would whip him into submission in the middle of a grocery store parking lot, but…she was carrying a black snake! That was one mean mother of a whip!

And really, who had the balls to say no to a woman like that? Hayner certainly didn't.

His wary gaze flickered from Quistis, to the whip, and back. She raised her eyebrows at him. Hayner swallowed, mouth suddenly dry.

"I think I should probably go talk things out with Mom," Hayner said finally, forcing the words uncomfortably past his reluctant lips.

Quistis smiled gently and nodded, and despite what Hayner had thought, she didn't look displeased at his answer. Hayner wondered briefly how her son could look so much like her, yet have none of her temperament. It was a shame, really.

"That sounds like a good idea, Hayner," the blonde replied instead, letting the boy in question relax an inch. "I probably shouldn't keep you long—I'm sure you have homework or projects or something to be working on."

"Oh yeah," Hayner somehow said with a straight face. "Papers and research and stuff. Lots of it."

The blue eyes that ran over him were mischievous and amused. "I'm sure. There just aren't enough hours in a day, are there?"

"Nowhere near," Hayner responded promptly, smothering a grin. "I hardly have time to Struggle anymore."

Quistis laughed, her whole face brightening in a way that made Hayner feel a little bit lighter. He liked Quistis—she was easy to talk to, treated him like he was her own son, was patient, a good listener—and could still put the fear of Jenova in him when the situation called for it. She visited occasionally, since she and his mom went way back; had known each other since their own college days. She was like Hayner's second mother, and was everything a mother should be.

So how the _hell_ had Seifer turned out to be such an asshole?

"Say hello to your mother for me," Quistis interrupted his disgruntled thoughts, giving him a fond glance. "Let me know what you decide, alright? Just ask if you need something."

"Thanks, I'll keep that in mind," Hayner said with a nod at her, a faint smile tugging at his mouth. "I'll get back to you on that."

"Take care, Hayner," Quistis said, nodding back at him and turning back to her truck. Moments later, he heard the sound of her engine revving into life, followed by the grinding skid of tires as she tore off for home.

Two minutes later found Hayner unlocking the front door of his house, kicking it shut behind him and immediately dropping his backpack by the threshold.

"Mom, I'm home!" he yelled up the stairs, making a beeline for the kitchen. His announcement prompted the soft thumping of footsteps from the staircase, growing slightly louder as they descended.

"Got anything I can eat?" he asked the otherwise empty room seconds before his mother rounded the bottom of the stairs and pattered gracefully into the kitchen with her nose stuck in a book.

"Hmmm…" The cover of the book remained unwaveringly in place for what felt like several long minutes to Hayner's starving mind, and then his mother seemed to realize she wasn't alone in the kitchen. With a surprised gasp, she lowered her new book abruptly and pressed a hand to her chest, then quickly closed it and set the object on the table. "Oh, Hayner dear, I'm so sorry, I just get so involved…what was it you asked?"

"No, it's fine, Mom," Hayner insisted, used to this by now. "Is there anything I can snack on?" he asked hopefully.

"Well…" she replied, going over to the pantry and taking a look at its contents. "We have more of those cookies I made yesterday," she began slowly, eyes roving over the shelves before closing the doors with a sharp snap. "But you're going to want something healthier than that."

Hayner whined and wasn't afraid to make it as drawn out and immature as possible. "Moooooom! _Health_ food?" He almost couldn't comprehend an idea that horrific.

His mother frowned at him, her large brown eyes reproachful. "Don't whine at me, Hayner, you should know better by now. There's oranges and bananas in the basket on the table, and carrot sticks in the vegetable drawer in the fridge—"

"But _Mom,_" Hayner protested, trying to give her the saddest look he could with his own large brown eyes. "I'll _wither away_ if all I eat is rabbit food!"

She stared at him, clearly undecided, uncertain, and entirely distrustful of her only son. It only took a few short seconds for her to cave with a resigned sigh that didn't hide the affectionate expression on her face. "Just like your father," she said fondly with a smile, coming over to kiss him on the forehead. "I _suppose_ you can have some cookies _if_ you have a piece of fruit," she conceded.

"Deal," Hayner grinned, yanking open the fridge and fishing out an apple to wash.

His mother took a seat at the kitchen table and returned to her book. When Hayner was finished, he sat down opposite her and took a bite, trying to get a look at what she was reading. She'd always been fond of myths and fairy tales, heroes and princesses and magical creatures that didn't exist in real life.

Real life.

Hayner paused, but really, he may as well just broach the subject already.

"Mom?" he questioned tentatively.

No reaction.

He cleared his throat and tried again. "_Mom_?"

Nothing.

He sighed, reached forward, and tapped the page she was reading with a finger.

In an instant, her eyes snapped up to his, searching his face for the source of the problem. "Is something wrong, Hayner?"

Hayner took another bite out of his apple and shrugged. "I saw Mrs. Almasy on my way home today."

Hayner's mother sighed quietly and bookmarked her place with the napkin he'd meant to use for his hands later, giving him her undivided attention. "Hayner…"

"No, I mean, she wasn't pushy or anything," he said hurriedly, trying to swallow the mashed up fruit in his mouth so he could talk clearly and without spitting too disgustingly. "But I promised I'd talk to you about it, and whatever."

She evaluated him quietly, and Hayner was reminded that you couldn't really hide anything from your mother. "I know the situation's not ideal—"

"No, Mom, that's not it—"

"Let me finish, please," she said quietly.

Hayner obediently pressed his lips together.

"I know the situation isn't what you would like," his mother started again, folding her hands on top of her book. "And I know you don't like Seifer. But your father and I are moving in less than a month, and right now we don't have the money to get you your own apartment, and it's too late to get you into the dorms."

Hayner nodded, glancing at the sealed cardboard boxes across the hall in the living room. They'd been over this already.

"We can only give you two options, dear. You can come with us—"

He made a face. Moving wasn't really something he wanted to have to do while in college.

She noticed his less than enthusiastic look. "It's quite nice in France, you know. I think you'd like it, Hayner."

"I guess I'd get to see Great-Uncle Lumiere more often," he acknowledged with half-hearted thoughtfulness.

"Do you want to move?"

"…..no," Hayner admitted, staring at the apple in his hand without really seeing it. "I don't want to, Mom."

She smiled at him sadly, understanding. "It's alright, Hayner, we understand. Your friends are here, your school is here, your life is here—you're old enough now to make your own decision, to go or stay where your heart tells you you should."

Yup, his mother was reading fairy tales again.

"Your second option," she continued, watching him carefully. "Quistis—Mrs. Almasy—has kindly volunteered to house you while you go to RTU. I know you don't get along with Seifer, but he's almost done with school; he only has one more year. You can last another year, can't you?"

So…move to France, or move in with his arch-nemesis's family. Why didn't Jenova just smite him where he sat? That would have been less painful than the choice he knew he'd have to make. No way in hell was he moving to another country at this point in his life.

On the other hand, Hayner didn't think he could last six _hours_ in the same house as Seifer Almasy, but it was impossible to say so out loud with that oh-so-hopeful expression on the face of the woman who'd spent fourteen hours in labor giving birth to him. Fourteen pain-riddled hours of her life that she'd never get back. He just couldn't do it, so he didn't say anything.

His mother seemed to take this as a willingness to try, and she really wasn't expecting much more than that. "I really do think you should accept her offer, Hayner," his mother told him after a while, when it became clear Hayner didn't have a response. "There are very few people willing to open their home like that to others, and Quistis would be more than happy to help you with anything school related. She's not charging rent, but maybe you can help with groceries after you get a job—"

The echoing chime of the doorbell made them both jump in surprise, making Hayner's apple fall out of his hand and roll across the table. He grabbed at it as he shot to his feet, stumbling awkwardly in his attempt to stand as his chair skidded across the floor behind him.

"I'll get it," he muttered, eyes darting from his mother's face to the floor and striding to the front door.

He squinted through the peephole, barely managing to see the blurry brown colors of a delivery service uniform. With an internal sigh, he opened the door—and promptly found himself with a face full of flowers.

Hayner sneezed on principle, and glared fiery lava at the smiling delivery man.

"Is there a Belle, here?" the stranger asked an in excessively cheerful manner, holding the bouquet in front of him like a weapon and checking a clipboard in his other hand. "From an…Adam?"

Hayner eyed the flowers—not just flowers, actually, but a bouquet of red roses—with dismay. Honestly, the house never smelled like anything _but_ flowers, they didn't really need any more. They practically lived in a greenhouse.

The smell was the whole reason he and Seifer didn't get along in the first place—one fateful recess in elementary school, the older boy decided Hayner was actually a girl because he always came to school smelling like roses. What kind of boy smells like roses? Not a real boy, certainly. Seifer promptly christened him 'Hayley', which prompted the first fight the two had ever had. Hayner never got over the indignity of having his gender re-assigned, Seifer never stopped being an ass about it, and neither of them believed in settling their differences like mature adults, so the not-so-civil unrest is history that continues to this day.

Hayner heaved a disgruntled sigh and turned to the kitchen. "Mom, Dad sent you flowers again," he called resignedly.

Belle appeared beside him like magic, face positively shining with happiness and pleasure as she subtly forced him out of the way using a quickly executed hip-shove. "Why thank you!" she told the surprised delivery man while embracing her new gift. "Thank you, very much!"

Hayner's eyes narrowed as the delivery man returned her smile and tipped his hat at her. "Thank _you_, ma'am! Pretty ladies like you deserve flowers every day!"

His mother blushed, smiled, and thanked him again. With a scowl, Hayner grabbed the man's clipboard, scrawled a horribly illegible signature that gave him large amounts of sadistic satisfaction, and tossed it back at the still-beaming man.

"Thanks," he said caustically, and pushed the door shut in his face.

Belle hummed happily as she brought the half-full vase from the hallway into the kitchen with the new roses and went about replacing them, trimming down stems and getting new water.

She practically had her own little glowing aura of happiness. His parents were hopeless romantics, the both of them.

"Oh, and Hayner!" His mother called. "You'll want to call Quis—Mrs. Almasy. And start packing. Sooner would be better than later!"

Hayner rolled his eyes, and dutifully went to make the phone call everyone seemed to have wanted him to make _yesterday_. Sheesh.

~x~

If there was anything Roxas actually liked about his roommate Riku, it was that he definitely knew his calculus.

However, Riku's idea of helping him (in reality, Riku didn't care about helping Roxas at all, he was just curious about what his roommate was cursing so vehemently over) was hovering over his shoulder and occasionally saying things like—

"You're doing it wrong," Riku said suddenly after nearly five minutes of silence, other than the sound of Roxas's pencil scratching across the paper.

Then Roxas would freeze, like he was doing right now, and stare in bewildered confusion at the numerical mess in front of him.

And then Riku would just turn and walk away.

That's it. No quick, concise explanation of _what_ he was doing wrong, no gesturing to whatever problem Riku was referring to, nothing. Just turn and walk away.

He'd busy himself by reading Warfare and Harmony, or going back to whatever new computer program he was designing, or something else equally nerdy and intelligent that Roxas was sure the other boy did simply to rub his higher IQ in his face.

It drove Roxas absolutely _bonkers_.

"You can't just say that and _leave_," Roxas snarled, spinning around to glare offended fury at his roommate. "What am I doing wrong?"

"Everything," Riku said casually without sparing him a glance, typing away on his laptop like his fingers were one with the keyboard.

Roxas took a deep breath and tried to convince himself that throwing things at Riku wouldn't help the situation. "Okay, look, Riku. Could you, for maybe, I dunno, twenty seconds, _not_ be the asshole you truly are and _tell me what I'm doing wrong?_ Just once. I swear I won't ask you to be so out of character ever again."

Riku gave him a disgusted, irritated look. "No."

"_Riku,_" Roxas growled, rather impressively similar to a very angry Chihuahua. Let's face it, he really isn't big enough to be compared to any other canine species.

"It's not a big deal, Roxas," Riku said snidely, still focused solely on his computer screen. "You're just taking the derivatives of functions instead of integrating them. You'll only have to do the whole assignment over again."

Roxas stared at him before slowly turning to look back at his paper. "Fuck."

Riku snorted and otherwise ignored him.

It took him about another hour and a half to correctly redo his problems, the sound of Riku and his keyboard typing the only other noise in the room. After quickly double checking his work and frantically rifling though the crap on his desk for a stapler, he stole a glance at the clock. He had eighteen minutes to get his work to Professor Leonhart's office.

"Thanks, Riku," Roxas muttered as he went out the door ("Hnn," replied Riku), patting himself down for his ID card. If he had to, he could sprint across campus to the office, but there should be a bus coming by in two minutes or so.

Roxas burst out of the dorm building just as the bus pulled up.

He fidgeted through the entire ten minute ride, every so often remembering not to crinkle the paper too horribly. Stealthily, he made his way back up to the front of the bus as they drew nearer his destination. A little ninja never hurt anyone.

The moment the bus doors opened Roxas took off like Sora on Pixie Stix and made a beeline for the chemistry and mathematics department.

Well okay, maybe not a beeline. It's possible he strolled along at a pace not unlike and certainly as graceful as a determined, high-powered workout walker out for her daily exercise. Or sauntered along with a speed that reinforced the purpose in his gaze, keeping a wary eye out for bicycles and other pedestrian traffic. Or travelled sedately along at—

Okay. Not the point.

He was in sight of the Ansem E. Wise building for physical sciences, and that's all that mattered.

Roxas was checking his phone for the time, glancing up for a second to make sure he wasn't about to run into anything, when his eyes locked onto the back of an awfully familiar figure. His stomach dropped past his shoes when he recognized who he was seeing, everything—his heart, his lungs, his muscles—freezing for a few precious seconds before soaring into hyperdrive.

Then his fight or flight response kicked in and decided he needed to establish a direct flight path in _that_ direction, now, now, _now_, _nownownow._

He hit Cloud with a full-body tackle…or, really, it _would_ have been a full-body tackle if Roxas had been about five inches taller, at least forty pounds heavier, and Cloud wasn't buff. As it was, Roxas basically ran into Cloud with enough force to make his brother stagger three steps to the right, and that's about it. It was sort of like running into a brick wall. Not that he did that on a regular basis, or anything.

"Roxas?" Cloud wheezed, grabbing his brother by the back of the shirt and pulling him away.

"Cloud, what are you doing here?" Roxas hissed, refusing to give ground and clinging to Cloud's shirt like an angry cat. "_Why are you here?_"

His brother frowned, looking far more irritated then he had any right to be. "None of your business, Roxas. Let go."

Roxas backed up but didn't let go of his shirt. "You're not here to talk to Professor Leonhart, are you?"

Cloud glared at him but didn't respond as he pushed stubbornly forward and methodically pried his little brother's fingers from his shirt.

Cloud," Roxas protested fervently, wincing at the unnecessary strength being employed against his hands. Cloud, stop. Can't you just—ow, ow!—alone? Just let it go; I know it's not—ah! Okay!—one of your strong suits and all but—Jenova's light Cloud, steps, there are steps here! Ow!"

"'Tall, dark, and handsome'?" Cloud asked abruptly, walking his clinging relative backward up the stairs.

"What?" Roxas asked, bewildered.

"_Tall. Dark. And handsome."_

Roxas's brain spun its wheels and dug through his speech history wheels since those words were clearly supposed to mean something to him. Where would he have even used that phrase around Cloud before? Nope, nope, nope, nothing. Who could be described that way? Nope, nope, Zack? No, haven't seen him lately. Nope, nope, he's blond, nope, Professor Leonhart?

Oooooh, Professor Leonhart…oops.

Roxas cleared his throat haltingly as Cloud dragged the last finger from his clothing and pushed him out of the way. "Yes, um, well…I didn't mean that. Well he is, a bit, if you like that sort of thing, but that was more my brain-to-mouth filter malfunctioning—"

"You _actually_ said that?" Cloud growled, narrowing his eyes. "You actually said that. Roxas, my last two girlfriends were _blonde_!"

"I _said_ it was a brain-to-mouth malfunction!" Roxas huffed, following his brother into the building and glancing at his phone again. He had about three minutes.

Cloud turned around and socked him in the shoulder without holding back, complete with the gift of a dirty look.

With a surprised yelp, Roxas retreated out of range, rubbing furiously at the fist-shaped bruise that would undoubtedly appear in a matter of minutes.

"Cloud," Roxas said irritably, trailing a safe distance behind as they started up the stairs.

"Sod off, Roxas," Cloud said flatly.

"Cloud," Roxas repeated with a scowl, stomping along after him and twisting laser eye daggers into his brother's back. "Can you at least wait five seconds while I turn this in?" He brandished his homework ineffectually at the air.

"Sure," Cloud said in a voice that promised he would make like a tree and leave the second his brother left him alone.

Said brother gritted his teeth and clenched his fists, further wrinkling the paper in his hands. He gave Cloud one last nasty glare and sprinted past him to the third floor where Professor Leonhart's mailbox was located, five doors down from Professor Zexion's classroom…

When he got back to the second floor, Cloud had vanished.

xxxxxx

Author's Note: Review? :D


End file.
